Should I talk to the teacher about shouting?

[Plumedenom]

I don't want to be that parent. But.
DD started in her first year of elementary school this week. Today was the first day full time. Last week when they were doing half days, she told me one teacher was nice and the other was not nice because she shouts all the time and tells them off. I took all this with a pinch of salt and we talked about teachers being different, having different styles but it doesn't mean she is telling them off, and that the teacher has just come from a class of much older children so there was some adjustment for the children and some for the teacher etc.
Today I went to pick older child up for the dentist and I could hear a teacher through an open window shrieking at the children. It stopped after 2 minutes and I thought maybe it was a one off. I waited another couple of minutes for DS and it started again. I asked the teaching assistant who answered the door and you've guessed it, it's my daughter's teacher. Now I have the dilemma. I heard a kind of shouting I would never do myself, that made me feel sick for these five year olds. Do I address it with her or give her the benefit of the doubt? I have no idea what is best in the long run. At the start of term she was all "come to us immediately if you have any worries"...but my faith in her has been seriously knocked I'll be honest. It was not nice, my blood was hoping listening to how she was talking to them, but o don't want to be that mum. I also don't want to let what really sounded a lot like emotional abuse in a school go unchecked. This is not an English school, there's no open door policy. It's very old fashioned, but that doesn't excuse the shouting I don't think.

So basically, how the hell do I handle it? Daughter's friend came out with a headache saying he didn't want to go tomorrow. Another child has told his mum he doesn't want to go, but I guess that's normal the first year. Another girl was crying on her way in the other day. I'm not sure if it's all perfectly normal or not.

I would go straight to the head teacher. That kind of behaviour is inexcusable. I had a teacher like this when I was a child and it was absolutely horrible. She was constantly shrieking and shouting at us.

I'm definitely not going straight to the head. I want to give her a chance to correct her behaviour, especially as this will most likely be her teacher for the next five years.

That happened at my dd's school once. A parent helper happened to walk past a classroom where the teacher was shouting, so she went and got the head to come and listen.

The teacher left at lunchtime, never to return.

I wouldn’t address it with the teacher personally, I don’t think that would help. I would report it to her superior, not sure who the appropriate people would be as you say it’s not an English school.

I’d be worried overall though as surely the other teachers/headteacher must know this is happening? It’s not good practice and you’d think it would have been pulled up quickly.

I would also go to the headteacher rather than directly to this teacher.

Head teacher job this for sure. You've witnessed it so it has to come from you. Please do this. I suffered a similar teacher at that age and I'm sure it's caused me emotional damage.

This could be your child's teacher for the next five years?

That would be extremely damaging.

Former teacher here- it is disturbing how many adults there are working in schools who are simply not cut out for the job.

One year with a teacher like that is one thing and bad enough, their whole primary school life would be really very damaging to them in many ways...

I agree that it would be difficult to say to the teacher personally.

Rather you need to talk to member of the senior leadership team, if not the headteacher themselves.

This is unacceptable from the teacher, he/she clearly needs support for behaviour management and training on how to use their voice.

Teachers that shout as a behaviour management techniques find it very hard to change. They usually adopt that approach as they are not good at engaging their class or dealing with poor behaviours...

A good SLT or headteacher will address it immediately with the teacher.

You go to the head teacher if it’s a complaint about one of her staff members. It’s not your place to address it directly with the teacher.

Who cares about being 'that mum'. This sounds U and I would complain.

I’d also go straight to the head.

Which country are you In?

Definitely address it with the teacher. I had a teacher like this in primary school and I never forget it, he ruined that school year. My mother eventually went in to speak to head and it stopped

I know (iirc) which country you're in- same as me.
And if so, I also know why you're not going to go to the head.
The class has 2 teachers, right? Can you speak to the other one? Otherwise, you'll be having a meeting with the teachers and all the parents soon- usually mid-October when class parent reps are elected. That might be a chance to bring it up, once you know the other parents better- most classes have a parents' WA group- (for better or worse) do you? Maybe sound out the others.
Good luck.

Be that mum.
Take it to the headteacher.
Good luck.

You sound like your more worried about what people think of u than u are of actually addressing the issue. Grow a pair and take it to the headmistress or master.

You need to take this up with the head. I had a teacher like this and the whole class hated her. I would tell my mum I didn't want to go to school because of her but I still got sent and mum didn't do anything about it.

I’d go straight to the head too, that’s horrible behaviour.

This needs to go to the DSL at the school, so they can investigate impartially.

Basically @Geamhradhh has figured out the dynamic pretty much immediately. As I say, it's not an English school, they don't even have a recognizable head teacher. They have a head of several schools who is completely absent and detached. The culture is one of discipline and shouting, I think probably in general I this country, not only in this small school. That's what my experience has been so far. It is not typical, but it's accepted behaviour. It's sad but when I asked my son about it, he said "one of my teachers shouts like that too, but she tells us she does it for our sakes". Which made me sad because it just sounded so much like abusive gas lighting. So basically it's institutional abuse. I think approaching the other teacher or in a class setting could be my only approach. Or just letting her know personally that I'm onto her and hope that's enough to tamper it down a bit... Or she just gets more sneaky and gaslighting herself. It's a minefield.

You are not her boss, it isn't your job to give her a chance to change. You make a complaint to the head (or governors of the head doesn't act), you tell the head the facts and let them manage their staff.

We were explicitly told to go first to the teachers to resolve our problems and that the head would immediately want to hear that we had talked to the teachers before going higher. I repeat, the head hasn't even been to the school yet this year.