Absolutely at my whits end with my weight

[whatashamee]

So as the title says. Im absolutely at the end of my tether with my weight.
Im 24, and weigh the most I've ever weighed my entire life.

today marks a year exactly until my wedding day. Ideally I want to loose around 8 stone in order to get down to a healthy weight for my height, and my BMI is classed as morbidly obese.

I feel like I've tried every diet to no avail. I love slimming world, but a few weeks in I get sick of it and crave things so badly that I just crack.
I want to look and feel amazing in my wedding dress, but I just can't seem to see any light at the end of this tunnel and I've already mentally come to terms with the fact I'm going to be 'plus size' for the rest of my life, if not bigger. I can't even mentally imagine myself being slim.

I do suffer with depression and anxiety. I don't know if perhaps my lack of self belief and self esteem is holding me back? But I'm feeling so low I don't know where to turn.

If anybody is able to help / even just give be a boost I would so appreciate it. I can't carry on like this, I recognise that. But I also seem to have such a lack of self worth that I don't see the point in trying 😔

Have you tried calorie counting? It's much easier than any of the clubs I've decided.

Calories in vs calories out - I lost 5 stone in 9 months by sticking to three simple rules:

1. Low calories, around 1300 a day
2. Reduce carbs
3. Reduce refined sugar

Also, counselling. Why are you so overweight? What are your triggers for eating? What are you missing emotionally that you are filling with food?

@hilbil21 no I haven't actually. I might look to give it a go. I just really struggle with motivation and give up so easily.
I checked a few months ago, and the calories I could have for my target weight were so little that it scared me and put me straight off the idea.

What have you tried OP? Addiction to sugar and carbs (sugar) make calorie restriction really difficult for lots of people in similar situation

I've tried slimming world, probably around 8/9 times now.
I've also tried weight watchers to no avail.
I haven't ever tried calorie counting because the thought of lowering my food intake scares me. I know that's ridiculous because that's what I need to do in order to loose weight.

Nutracheck app is really good for calorie counting op. Just weigh/measure your portions for a while until you know what you're consuming.
It's really easy for helping you to be aware of portion size and making better choices.

Talk to your gp too, they can support you on your weight loss mission.

My fitnesspal.

Might seem tedious but if you do it accurately it's a big help. And enlightening !

Try MyFitnessPal for counting your calories, it’s excellent and sends you reminders if you haven’t logged your food for the day. I found this the best way as you can still have some snacks so long as it’s within your calories intake. Drink plenty as this will make you feel full and then you’re less likely to want to snack.

The thing that helped me was getting a fit bit. I didn’t realise I needed so few calories.
I’m pretty small so I only need 1300 calories a day, just to stay at the weight I am.
If I want to lose weight I need less than this. It was a game changer for me, I was eating waayyy too much. That 1300 can be gone in one meal, it’s it’s a big roast for example.

I also found a sport I enjoyed, like actually looked forward to and that really helped.

You got this Op, at the end of the day you ARE in control of how you move and what you eat, so you can totally do this 💯

Diets don't work op. Get the book Why We Eat Too Much by Andrew Jenkinson and read it this weekend. It explains why diets don't work for people with serious obesity and that many overweight people who have struggled with loss will have to eat far fewer calories to lose and maintain that an app like my fitness Pal will suggest you need. It explains that we eat the wrong foods - too much processed shit which includes crap recommended by diets like slimming would like Muller light yogurts. It suggests how to radically over haul what you eat.

I yo yo dieted for 20 years. Could always lose but never maintain. My metabolism was shot and I could barely eat over 1200 without my weight set point piling the pounds on. Eventually I had weight loss surgery. Best thing I have ever done. Which I hadn't wasted my 20s and the majority of my 30s being fat and doing diets that would never work.

*wish I hadn't wasted

When I was very overweight LCHF really helped me break the cycle with sugar / high carb foods.

It all comes down to the same though - calories in v calories out.

My fitness pal is brilliant. I started a couple of months ago to support my husband who had stones to lose after putting on lots of weight going through chemo (not everyone loses weight with cancer!). I had about 2 stone to lose and have steadily and easily lost a couple of pounds a week, and it doesn't feel like I'm missing out. I've linked it to my garmin watch and if I want to eat something more I just do more exercise to compensate and give me more of a calorie allowance.

When you first start you'll be gobsmacked at how many calories there are in some things, but it's easy to make healthier choices. We got a decent set of scales to weigh things easily. I swapped bread for sandwich thins, add lettuce to everything, stopped eating biscuits and crisps for snacks and eat grapes and carrots if I want a sugary boost. I've never been able to do a diet before but this doesn't feel like a diet, it feels like a healthier lifestyle change.

In terms of motivation, I was going to say that your motivation is your wedding day, since you say you want to look different by then. But really, just do it for the health benefits. Don't set an unachievable weightless goal, just do a stone at a time and celebrate each one. You can do this!

OP, one of the most important things to keep in mind if you're trying to lose weight is that it's okay to crack. It's okay to have a day, or a weekend, where you eat nothing but chips and chocolate. As long as you dust yourself down and get back on it the next day. Otherwise you just self-sabotage by thinking 'oh I've ruined everything now may as well give up'.

Slimming world or Weight Watchers is a form of calorie counting it's just that they encourage you toward the lower calorie but filling foods to fill you up, like lean protein and fruit and vegetables, and you don't have to count everything but if you did you would be at the same calories level as if you just counted your calories.

Personally I found calorie counting to be soul destroying so tried low-carb instead and have stuck to a low-carb diet ever since. Works for me.

I'm the same OP, wish I had some advice but I'm afraid not.

I'm 36 and weigh 24st

Tried slimming world in 2019 and lost 3.5 stone but it all went back on over lockdown

Hate myself at the moment

Ah bless you. I know love. I’ve been there
I did slimming world and lost 8 stone. It took 3.5 years. Lost 4 stone fairly quickly then it slowed down. But I was happy with that.

That was 6 years ago. And I’m usually just 1 stone back on. But since the summer hols this year, it’s crept up to now 2 stone back on. So 6 stone total loss. Not happy about this. And restarted again alongside exercise to shift it.

Im a creature of habit. So the same kind of meals suit me daily or every few days.

Breakfast
2 tblsp oats
3 tblsp natural yog/soya
Banana
Orange

Lunch

Homemade hummus (chickpeas, splash of oil, lemon juice and a blob of natural yog)
Carrots
Cucumbers etc
Cold chicken (homemade chicken thighs, sprinkled with a seasoning and roasted)
Homemade soup (currently pea and mint (literally just bag of peas, pack of fresh mint, blob of oil, vegetable stock)

Dinner
Tonight is toast and marmalade and a pot of tea. Been fancying it for ages.

Had a cheese and ham/mushroom omelette yesterday with loads of fresh green beans

Bolognaise (homemade) with Savoy cabbage

Vege sausages with mashed swede and veges and gravy

Jacket potatoes beans cheese

Small bowl of pesto pasta

I think I’m a bit free with the evening meal as I’ve been so careful during the day. I just make sure I don’t have large portions.

If I’m hungry in between. I might have a tiny bit of homemade low fat flapjack. Crumbly as hell but I just grab a bit with my cuppa

Or a boiled egg and salt

More hummus and veges

Fruit

When I get bored. I just rotate things a bit

Make a different soup or different hummus. Try different crudités

Obviously there are blips. And that’s life. But this is my go to ‘I’m back on it’ routine I’m never hungry.

I’m either on it or so off it!! Very black and white. And I’m still like that after 6 years! But I’m at peace with it. And I think I just get fed up of feeling shit. Headaches, back aches, lethargy, sluggish, full all the time, nauseas, and depressed about how I feel and look. So I think I’m so fucking determined to ‘get back on it’ that I do.

Although I’m mostly black and white. I think over a period of time. It evens out grey. If that makes sense.

I ‘find’ a stone. Then I ‘lose’ a stone. Alongside with exercise. Swimming 4 times and week if not more. Cycling when I can. Yoga.

But it works for me. And I’m at peace with it. My body acceptance is stable. And I just go with it. I don’t give myself a hard time. When life gets in the way. Or ‘meh.. fuck it.. can’t be arsed’ crops up here and there.

I think the determination to lose weight and look good and healthy. And young drives me. I’ve never felt this positive. Even when I’m still over what I’d like to be weight wise. I’m doing something about it

I hope this helps. Best of luck with it. Slimming world changed my life. Especially trying to be carb free as much as possible. As soon as I start eating carbs. The weight piles on my thighs. Bibbily bobbly legs. So low carb plus exercise really works for me

I personally can't do calorie counting as I just can't stand weighing and logging everything, but I don't like low carb either

Is it something that you and your partner could embark on together?

I also struggled to lose weight and in the end I just stopped worrying about what I was eating and focussed on fitness. I go to the gym 5 times a week in my lunch hour and the weight has just dropped off me.

Everyone I know who runs or cycles or swims or goes to the gym is slim.

Is there something like that that you could do? Something like couch to 5k or join a gym?

Calorie count and weight training! The more muscle you gain, the more calories you burn.