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The most stressful scenario known to woman,

25 replies

BlackTee40 · 08/09/2021 13:21

must be getting up after you've farted and it's ahem gone elsewhere, you think you've got it all out surreptitiously, BUT YOU CAN'T BE SURE!

OP posts:
Mariell · 08/09/2021 13:26

Never happened to me thank goodness mess. Are you ill or is your diet lacking in fibre?

FooFighter99 · 08/09/2021 13:42

@Mariell

Never happened to me thank goodness mess. Are you ill or is your diet lacking in fibre?
OP means the gas (not poo) and yes, been there, done that!!
grey12 · 08/09/2021 13:46

Definitely NOT the most stressful scenario. But a "oops" moment..... or when you think it's going to be silent and it isn't Blush or when you're alone is a supermarket aisle and then someone comes along! GO AWAY! Let my fart smell dissipate first! Angry

Burnamer · 08/09/2021 13:49

Ha ha ha! Earlier this week I was wondering (inspired by the thread about the poster not knowing men don’t use toilet roll when they wee) what men would be shocked to learn about women and this was the thing I thought would be most shocking to them.

ZenNudist · 08/09/2021 13:52

Da fuck? I am female and never knew this could happen?

WeatherwaxLives · 08/09/2021 13:54

This has only happenned to me since I've had DC - the first time it happened was a WTAF moment!!

Worst is if you're in company, suddenly you're desperately trying to hold it in, you know if you get up to try to get to the loo you're not going to make it, and then it sneaks out and disappears. Then you're stuck, you darent move. Anything could happen!

ColitisSucks · 08/09/2021 13:56

@ZenNudist

Da fuck? I am female and never knew this could happen?
Neither did I till it happenned to me!!

It's only ever happenned when I've been sat on a solid surface - like a vinyl chair - and I've been squeezing so hard to keep it in that it has no choice but to go forwards, rather than back.

WeatherwaxLives · 08/09/2021 13:57

Bizarre extra n's there - weird autocorrect!!

Shirleyphallus · 08/09/2021 14:00

It sort of rolls up through the lips doesn’t it?

JasonMomoasgirlfriend · 08/09/2021 14:01

Lol yup

ButterflyAway · 08/09/2021 14:03

So not making the comment I want to here, but I feel you Grin

BlackTee40 · 08/09/2021 14:07

😂😂😂

OP posts:
JustGiveMeGin · 08/09/2021 14:10

All I'm going to say is yep!Blush

VladmirsPoutine · 08/09/2021 15:24

What does that mean? Getting up and its gone elsewhere?

bigbaggyeyes · 08/09/2021 16:30

Happens to me if I fart in bed, lying in my back, I then roll over and 'woah release' Grin good job my dh works nights and I'm alone in bed most of the time.

BlackTee40 · 08/09/2021 16:37

@VladmirsPoutine

What does that mean? Getting up and its gone elsewhere?
Just be thankful you don't know Grin
OP posts:
JasonMomoasgirlfriend · 08/09/2021 16:38

@VladmirsPoutine

What does that mean? Getting up and its gone elsewhere?
Into your vagina.
OrlandointheWilderness · 08/09/2021 16:38

Oh god 😂! Know what you mean, it doesn't happen often but it is a what the fuck?! Moment when it happens!
My bf was slightly surprised when I told him that having a bath meant drainage for about an hour afterwards 😂

mamamilkmachine · 08/09/2021 17:00

@OrlandointheWilderness have you ever watched raised by wolves? A girl on that programme called the bath scenario the "afterbath" it really made me chuckle

BlackTee40 · 08/09/2021 18:58

Thankfully I've never had that happen, mine seems to seal itself when dunked under water.

OP posts:
SingleStrongWoman1 · 08/09/2021 19:00

This reply has been deleted

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peachcherries · 08/09/2021 19:04

If I didn't have Crohn's disease then I totally would agree...however I would love wind to be the only consequence! With Crohns or UC it's the constant fear of losing control! Give me a good fart over shitting myself any day 🤣

Shitfuckcommaetc · 08/09/2021 19:05

Ah yes, I think the term is 'queef'

BuntyCarmichael · 08/09/2021 19:14

Almost as bad as the yoga fart GrinGrinGrin

BlackTee40 · 09/09/2021 08:56

😂😂😂

That happened to me once too, but luckily it was silent, it just stank 🙈

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