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Original poster

Boys with long hair

110 replies

LST · 28/07/2021 17:18

Why do people feel the need to pass judgement of bots who choose to have long hair?

It's happened a lot. Especially with older family members but I and ds just shrug those comments off. When a complete strangers tells him he'll 'need that cutting before he goes back to school' I just find it takes the piss!

No real reason for the post really apart from a bit of a rant. As you were!

OP posts:
Babdoc · 29/07/2021 09:48

Long hair was actually the fashion for boys when I was young, back in the 60’s. DH had hair past his shoulders when I met him in ‘75.
I remember going to see the musical Hair in the west end, in ‘69, and loved the lyrics of the title song:
“My hair like Jesus wore it
Hallelujah I adore it
Hallelujah, Mary loved her son
Why don’t my mother love my
Hair?”
Eloquently put!

illuyankas · 29/07/2021 09:51

"It doesn't matter what people think. It's when they share what they think my ds should do with his hair that bothers me"

If you keep smiling and nodding and totally ignore it, people soon stop. I had some school parents asked me if I ever cut my ds's hair short when he was younger, I just told them it's up to him, and I liked it long too.

kurtney · 29/07/2021 09:52

My DS has had long hair since he was about 5 (now 17). When he was younger he got mistaken for a girl by many and called 'gay' and 'Jesus' when he got to secondary school. His response was that there was nothing wrong with being a girl or being gay. None of it made him want to cut it and as he got to about Y10/11, his peers started thinking he was cool and now a lot of his mates have grown their hair out as well.

If it doesn't bother him, try and ignore it. We did. We offered to cut his hair if he wanted but said it was his choice and that we loved his hair.

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Beauty
x2boys · 29/07/2021 09:57

My fourteen year old has been growing his hair since the start of the pandemic, its shoulder length now
All my boyfriends when i was younger had long hair, i was into rock music.

Iwantamarshmallowman · 29/07/2021 10:02

And you always get some idiot who will insist on calling him 'The little girl' when he's very clearly a boy.

fuckingsickofcovid · 29/07/2021 10:03

Tbh people can bugger off, how anyone can look at this hair and say it's not beautiful is beyond me, I'm always being encouraged to cut his hair, to which I answer 'it does get cut, we take the dead ends off regularly'.

Boys with long hair
SpiceRat · 29/07/2021 10:03

The inane comments aren’t even reserved for children. My DP has comments all the time because his hair is long, it’s usually from chav idiots, especially feral teenagers.

grey12 · 29/07/2021 10:07

DH also decided to grow his hair and it wasn't without unwelcomed comments. Ignore!

Todaytomorrowyesterday · 29/07/2021 10:08

When I met my husband he had hair down to his bum! That was a shock when he chopped it all off early in our relationship!
My brother is currently growing his hair (he has curly hair like our Dad & me so it’s currently big hair rather than long hair Grin ) but he looks good!

Though we do have a friend who son (11) has let his hair grow long - he hates it and already taken the scissors to it so he has a very odd looking fringe currently - but she won’t let her son have it shorter as he wants - she can’t possibly cut her sons gorgeous hair. That’s sad as he hates it!! Hopefully before he goes to secondary in Sept she lets him have a choice - he currently lives in hats.

TheChosenTwo · 29/07/2021 10:10

Ds has got what I would consider to be ‘long’ hair.
I hate it, he likes it. He has the same conditions my girls did at his age (9), the front either gets tied up or pushed back with a band so it doesn’t get in his eyes or he gets the front trimmed. He went for the trim and also a tidy up round the neck line.
He doesn’t like it really short like how I used to have it cut before he had a real preference. Lockdown was great for him because there was no prospect of him going to the barbers Grin
I think I dislike it because he looks really scruffy, he has 4 crowns so his hair just grows at totally odd angles and keeping it shorter makes it all look tidier. But it’s not my hair and he has it how he wants, I don’t tell him i don’t like it!
Family members say to him that he needs a haircut and he just says “nah” to them all.

TheChosenTwo · 29/07/2021 10:11

Conversely dd has her hair short Grin

x2boys · 29/07/2021 10:12

@Todaytomorrowyesterday

When I met my husband he had hair down to his bum! That was a shock when he chopped it all off early in our relationship! My brother is currently growing his hair (he has curly hair like our Dad & me so it’s currently big hair rather than long hair Grin ) but he looks good!

Though we do have a friend who son (11) has let his hair grow long - he hates it and already taken the scissors to it so he has a very odd looking fringe currently - but she won’t let her son have it shorter as he wants - she can’t possibly cut her sons gorgeous hair. That’s sad as he hates it!! Hopefully before he goes to secondary in Sept she lets him have a choice - he currently lives in hats.

It takes a, while with curly hair 😂, my son went through the big, fluffy hair stage.
iklboo · 29/07/2021 10:47

DS's hair grows out instead of down so he looks like a mushroom & he prefers it short. One of his classmates has the most gorgeous long, red hair, almost copper coloured. He ties it up for school.

BearSoFair · 29/07/2021 11:13

DS1 had long hair until 14 or 15, never had any problems from other kids at school but several shitty comments from adults! Most memorably SIL who took me aside at a bbq when he was about 12 and quietly asked if I was worried that he might 'go gay' Hmm

BogRollBOGOF · 29/07/2021 12:28

DS tends to be about shoulder length.

  1. he likes it
  2. it suits him and the weight of longer hair keeps it neater than a shorter cliché boys style as his hair sprouts in odd directions
  3. he hates having his hair cut so 3-4 trims a year suits him, especially as it's thick and fast growing.
  4. it hides his knobbly head (although it has improved with age)

DS2 is a little shorter, kind of a longer pixie style rather than longer bob. Still the longest in his class.

It's great at identifying them running around at a distance from their distinctive hair movement... unless we're in Cornwall and suddenly all the boys are shaggy Grin

It's a boys= short hair, girls= long hair area although most people don't comment.
ILs do. Hmm At least my two don't have the corporate family hair cut!

It's a shame when young boys get their hair clippered off just because that's what you do with boys whether it suits them or not. Or little girls with fine straggly hair growing it as long as possible, when it would look neater trimming the raggy ends and keeping it tidy as it grows and thickens. Work with what suits the child rather than clichéd gender rules for the sake of it.

FunnyWonder · 29/07/2021 13:57

@BogRollBOGOF I can relate to the hair weight thing. DS has a double crown and short hair on him sticks up at ridiculous angles like a spider plant. Only the weight of long hair works. And he likes it long!

BudrosBudrosGalli · 29/07/2021 14:54

Personally, I don't like long hair on boys. But it is none of my business and their choice, so I would never say anything.

Crankley · 29/07/2021 16:08

@BudrosBudrosGalli

Personally, I don't like long hair on boys. But it is none of my business and their choice, so I would never say anything.
I feel the same. I think long hair looks awful on young boys but none of my business.
Demilunary · 29/07/2021 16:10

@BudrosBudrosGalli

Personally, I don't like long hair on boys. But it is none of my business and their choice, so I would never say anything.
But do you dislike long hair on girls, too? Surely it doesn’t look much different?
Reallyreallyborednow · 29/07/2021 16:30

Personally, I don't like long hair on girls. But it is none of my business and their choice, so I would never say anything

Original poster
LST · 29/07/2021 16:31

Why do people dislike long hair on boys? Genuine question

OP posts:
GoldBar · 29/07/2021 16:36

But do you dislike long hair on girls, too? Surely it doesn’t look much different?

I dislike long hair on both younger boys and girls as it gets very tangled, messy and unkempt unless cared for properly which many children aren't able to do (and the parents don't always do it). It also seems to get in the children's way a lot. When kids get a bit older, they get less food in it and do less activities which involve trailing their hair through the mud and dust. They can also look after it better themselves (both boys and girls).

But this is personal preference which I would keep to myself...it is incredibly rude to comment negatively on anyone's appearance, adult or child.

Comedycook · 29/07/2021 16:38

On these boards I've noticed a trend. Boys have long hair which is doted on by their mother's and if it's cut, the mothers weep endlessly over it. As for their daughters, long hair is tacky and impractical so the poor girls are marched off to the hairdressers for a sensible bob cut asap

Nohomemadecandles · 29/07/2021 16:40

DS2 had long hair until he chose to have it cut about 6 or 7 years old.

My grandmother tutted. My mum said he couldn't see where he was going (he could).

A stranger (elderly-ish lady with a burning rod up her backside) said he needed a haircut.

"Jesus had long hair" said DS1 giving her a proper Paddington stare! I bit my tongue and walked them away desperately trying not to laugh. I don't know to this day where he heard that. Grin

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 29/07/2021 16:40

My youngest ds doesn’t have what you’d call long hair…it’s around 4 inches long. But it’s long for a boy. His choice..his older brothers have short hair by choice. We don’t get comments so much now hes 9 but in his early years he was sometimes called a girl by accident.

Made me laugh when a fellow school mom came up to me at school to invite him to her DS birthday party a couple of weeks ago. We know each other to talk to in passing but not friends. Her son had been talking about wanting to invite my boy…obviously the kiddo knew DS’s name but mom didn’t recognise it. So her son said he’s the boy with lots of orange hair. Apparently that nailed it and she knew exactly who he was Grin.