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Original poster

My worst nightmare nearly happened this morning 😞

460 replies

purrswhileheeats · 27/07/2021 17:51

I was reversing out of my driveway and almost ran over my neighbour's child, he was directly behind my car. He's no more than three years old and the only reason I saw him was he was waving his arms in the air and I saw them in my rear view mirror. He's so tiny I wouldn't have seen him otherwise as he was below the level of the back window IFYSWIM. My neighbour was loading stuff into his boot so I beeped the horn and shouted to him, he ran over, grabbed the boy and took him inside.

I was shaking and crying (sorry, that's so MN) when I got to work. They're a new family on the estate, only moved in a few months ago. The dad must've known the boy was playing outside while he was loading the car but didn't bother to check where he was.

I'm waiting for them to come home so I can go and speak to them. It's so horrible, I feel sick thinking about what could have happened.

OP posts:
LublinToDublin · 27/07/2021 20:17

Anyone who allows their child to scoot down a pavement unsupervised with multiple dropped kerbs is a fucking idiot.

Only because selfish car drivers have made it dangerous. They are the fucking idiots in my book Clymene

AlwaysLatte · 27/07/2021 20:21

So scary. We have a long track up to the main road, the track is also a public footpath and it's amazing how many times people run around the corner down the track without checking first, especially as my car is electric so very quiet. I nearly hit a dog once as someone just let it off the lead as soon as they got the track, and I drive super slowly there. Deliver drivers pelt down there sometimes and I dread to think what could happen one day.

Ohfuckitall · 27/07/2021 20:23

What is wrong with you? I don't know how much clearer to make this? I am not speaking of runners

You are clearly trying to shift responsibility for you hitting someone on a pavement to them for moving too fast. Hmm That could be an adult or a child.
I understand you perfectly. What you fail to understand is that there is absolutely no excuse for you hitting someone with your car when they are on a pavement. That's exclusively on you.

MotionActivatedDog · 27/07/2021 20:23

The bottom line is both parties have it within their power to do something that will make this scenario much less likely to happen again. The parents can keep hold of their child and the OP can reverse into her drive. It’s the responsibility of both parties to do what they can to reduce the risk.

user1497787065 · 27/07/2021 20:23

Surely the risk is there whilst reversing into one's drive in exactly the same way as reversing out.

I can't believe the number of people who walk behind a reversing vehicle in a supermarket car park.

Mamanyt · 27/07/2021 20:24

I'd start reversing into the driveway. I live in an apartment complex here in the US, and my section is filled with kids. About 80% of the tenants reverse into their parking spaces for just that reason...and one can get away from even a watchful parent in a heartbeat.

MotionActivatedDog · 27/07/2021 20:26

Surely the risk is there whilst reversing into one's drive in exactly the same way as reversing out.

No it isn’t.

1)There is far less chance that there will be a child on OPs drive than in the road.

  1. OP being on the street means she is already visible to any child or adult on the street so they can stand back/grab their child.

  2. OP pulling up past the drive is her opportunity to check for anything that is on her drive before she reverses.

zaffa · 27/07/2021 20:27

@Ohfuckitall

What is wrong with you? I don't know how much clearer to make this? I am not speaking of runners

You are clearly trying to shift responsibility for you hitting someone on a pavement to them for moving too fast. Hmm That could be an adult or a child.
I understand you perfectly. What you fail to understand is that there is absolutely no excuse for you hitting someone with your car when they are on a pavement. That's exclusively on you.

How many times?! I accept responsibility for what I do in my car - show me where I don't? I took steps to improve my visibility - show me where I didn't?! But that does not change the fact that as parents we are responsible for keeping our children safe, even if we feel the situation we are keeping them safe in shouldn't be a risk. That's life, and I'd rather deal with the reality and take steps to keep her safe than live in your world and pretend the risks don't exist or I shouldn't do anything to mitigate them.
TheVolturi · 27/07/2021 20:28

It's obviously your fault op for daring to reverse off your own drive! You should smack yourself on the head with a rolling pin and chant I will always reverse onto my drive and never off it! Ffs mn!
I hope you are OK op Flowers

zaffa · 27/07/2021 20:29

@MotionActivatedDog

The bottom line is both parties have it within their power to do something that will make this scenario much less likely to happen again. The parents can keep hold of their child and the OP can reverse into her drive. It’s the responsibility of both parties to do what they can to reduce the risk.
I cannot agree with this more. At the end of it, I'd rather take action to ensure my child was safe even if legally it wouldn't be my responsibility if they were hit by a car. Frankly I'd rather do anything and everything I can to ensure my DD is not hit by a car, even if legally it is not my responsibility to do so.
LublinToDublin · 27/07/2021 20:30

Surely the risk is there whilst reversing into one's drive in exactly the same way as reversing out
No it isn't. As has been explained on here.
When you drive up to your house you can see who is in the immediate vicinity before you start reversing. You get to look all the way down uour drive too.

When you reverse out, you are seated further away from the leading part of the vehicle and have limited sight of the road / pavement to either side.

lannistunut · 27/07/2021 20:31

The parents let the little boy potter around the front of their house when they're tinkering with their car, they usually keep an eye on him. This morning was not a time for that, it was 7.30am and most people on the complex are leaving for work around that time.

Oh you've annoyed me rather with this OP, of course a child should be able to play on a pavement, and 7:30am does not mean 'I can reverse without a care because it is commuting time'.

You need to reverse onto your drive.
You need to take a good look around for kids before you enter the car.
In short - you need to accept you live in an area where there are children playing and do what you can.

It was a horrible shock and I am sure you meant no harm but you are rather blaming the child when it is you at fault, really. Have a Brew and work out what you can change going forwards.

Ohfuckitall · 27/07/2021 20:32

I accept responsibility for what I do in my car - show me where I don't?

Literally all of your posts. Responsibility does not look like this: 'I'll try not to hit you with my car when you are on the pavement but if I do its because of how you used the pavement.'

Walkaround · 27/07/2021 20:33

Why are people referring to pavements when the OP has specified there is no pavement, so the child was either on the road or on the OP’s private driveway, neither of which is quite the same thing as a public footway? If the child was on her drive, she could just as easily have reversed into him driving onto the drive as off it.

DemBonesDemBones · 27/07/2021 20:33

@LublinToDublin

I'm not very good at maths but...

'When you reverse out, you are seated further away from the leading part of the vehicle and have limited sight of the road / pavement to either side.'

Aren't you exactly the same distance away from the back of your car either way?!

bumblingbovine49 · 27/07/2021 20:34

To be honest, this is why I reverse into my drive without exception, even if it is awkward, and it sometimes is. In live on a quiet street and children and animals run past the front of my house often . I feel very unsafe reversing out , however careful I am, I have too many blind spots

Clymene · 27/07/2021 20:34

Children shouldn't play around moving vehicles.

It's really not that hard.

zaffa · 27/07/2021 20:35

@Ohfuckitall

I accept responsibility for what I do in my car - show me where I don't?

Literally all of your posts. Responsibility does not look like this: 'I'll try not to hit you with my car when you are on the pavement but if I do its because of how you used the pavement.'

Could you link the quotes where I said that? No? I'm sorry but I can't engage with you any longer, because your argument is irrational and based on a number of ridiculous assumptions you've made about me that have no grounding in the reality of anything I've said.
lannistunut · 27/07/2021 20:36

@Walkaround

Why are people referring to pavements when the OP has specified there is no pavement, so the child was either on the road or on the OP’s private driveway, neither of which is quite the same thing as a public footway? If the child was on her drive, she could just as easily have reversed into him driving onto the drive as off it.
But people must walk somewhere between the houses, they surely are not expected to drive to the next door house? So even if no official pavement, that means it is one of those estates where it is shared space - in which case the child is entotled to be there too.
Biscoffbiscou · 27/07/2021 20:36

This reminds me of years ago I was jigging a baby (bf‘s family) and bouncing it in the air. I was just about to do one of those big “woooo” throws in the air and catch, tilted my head up, and realised we were standing directly under a low-hanging ceiling fan.

I put the baby down and didn’t pick up any more children that week. Still makes me feel weird now when I think about it. Buuughghhhh.

lannistunut · 27/07/2021 20:37

@Clymene

Children shouldn't play around moving vehicles.

It's really not that hard.

It wasn't moving, until the OP started to reverse towards the child Confused

Cars shoudn't drive at moving children IMO.

BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand · 27/07/2021 20:38

@AdelindSchade

This thread has made me think actually. I am going to make sure I alway reverse into spaces.
Good to hear!

If just one person drives that little bit more safely in future, it will have been worth it for all of us who have been banging this drum.

Reversing out of drives isn't such an obvious safety issue as e.g. speeding, and so many people do it that it's considered acceptable, but it shouldn't be.

It's actually been quite shocking to see how many posters react the opposite way and deny any responsibility for hazard awareness/avoidance. Driving over a pavement - the pedestrians always have right of way (quite rightly), so the onus is on the driver to have been as safe as they could possibly be.

LublinToDublin · 27/07/2021 20:38

Aren't you exactly the same distance away from the back of your car either way?!

I said from the leading part of the car .

As the car heads up the drive to the pavement and possible children etc. if you are reversing, you are further away than if you were driving forwards. Therefore you have a poorer view of potential danger. Clear now?

Original poster
purrswhileheeats · 27/07/2021 20:39

This is the first time I've been ripped apart like this, I usually stick to the Litter Tray and post photos of kitties.

I accept that it would be better/safer to reverse onto my driveway and I will try this. However it is the parents' fault that their little boy was unsupervised and ran behind my car as I was reversing slowly and carefully out of my driveway. They should have been more diligent. I'm not being made to feel guilty or responsible for what could have happened but it's all gone round in my head today.

I have no gripe with my Romanian neighbours other than they need to keep a better eye on their young boy.

OP posts:
LublinToDublin · 27/07/2021 20:40

If you are reversing into your drive from the road , you have full view of the whole area, therefore safer