Do you let your child play in the dirt?

[GoldBar]

Just curious to know what other parents' views on this are.

I was out last week with two parents with different approaches (mine is somewhere in the middle). We were sitting having coffee in an outside cafe with a garden and small play area, with grass, dirt and muddy puddles from sprinklers. Parent 1's children (aged 5 and 3) started playing with stones and twigs in the dirt, building piles of them, and ran through the muddy puddles in the grass and held their hands under the sprinklers, getting wet and filthy. Parent 1 didn't say anything. Parent 2's child (4) went to do the same but Parent 2 told them to come back and sit at the table if they were going to be 'naughty' and not play nicely. Parent 1 smiled and said she was ok with her children getting wet and dirty because they do it all the time and she always brings spare clothes. Parent 2 said she brings spare clothes too but she thinks children should be taught to look after their clothes and not get dirty just for the sake of it.

[texasss]

Mine decided to build sandcastles last week... in a stable. Apparently it's like a beach 😑

[Newbornandupwards]

I'm def parent 1. Too sad when parents won't let their DC get muddy. I'm a trail runner in my mid 50's and love nothing more than getting covered in mud though!

[81Byerley]

My Grandson wearing goggles to look in puddles.

[GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER]

We used to live among a mostly Mediterranean community in the Middle East, where it was definitely a sign of bad parenting if your children weren’t clean and nicely dressed at all times. In particular, running around barefoot, as ours often did, was particularly scandalous, even when it was safe.

However as one of the women, who was from a much wealthier background than most of them, told me, a lot of those parents would have come from families where even a generation or two ago, being shoeless was a common sign that you couldn’t afford any - nice clothes ditto.
Hence the ingrained attitude.
They also looked askance at mothers like me and the relatively few others from N European countries, who would appear on our compound in the afternoons in very likely tatty old shorts, T shirts and flip flops, instead of being nicely dressed with proper shoes and jewellery.

This was all years ago now though - attitudes may well have changed.

[BogRollBOGOF]

I'm a parent 1. Also do Guiding and Scouting... we often have the girls being reticent about getting their uniform dirty and we often have to remind them that that is what their uniform is for.

There might be some times that a child is not dressed for a reason, I have walked past play areas and said "not today because..." (it was probably funtionally walking through the park as a direct route rather than intention to use it for recreation). I have always cringed when a parent has chosen to take a child into an area for play then constantly badgered the child about getting dirty. Places like trampoline parks and a child in a giant, floofy dress that inhibits movement.

If parent 2 had said "I don't want you to get dirty because we're going to..." it's different to just telling them off for getting dirty and saying it's naughty.

Messy and physical play is important

[Lemonmelonsun]

Bog mine have managed to climb trees, jump, run in large princess dresses 😂👸🤣 a well as any other kind of dress...

[rantymcrantface66]

I actually feel really sorry for the child of parent 2. Naughty - my goodness!

[tbtf]

You can bet your bottom dollar that Parent 2's DC is a girl and isn't allowed to climb in the frilly dresses she's put in either

[Merryhobnobs]

Parent one... Unless sof course it is completely inappropriate plCe or time... But that is rare.

[JoborPlay]

Places like trampoline parks and a child in a giant, floofy dress that inhibits movement.

Both my kids have very strong feelings on what they wear so the very practical leggings/ shorts/ t shirts often get passed over for party dresses, despite conversations about practicality. I usually take a more practical outfit with us but can count on one hand the times DC have chosen to wear them.

[Bitofachinwag]

@81Byerley

My Grandson wearing goggles to look in puddles.

[GoldBar]

My Grandson wearing goggles to look in puddles.

Really like that idea!

[TheLovelinessOfDemons]

Parent 1. Put your DC in clothes you don't mind getting dirty. What I don't like is that DS2's after school club has a mud kitchen, so I have to scrub his school shoes twice a week and his PE trainers once a week.

[allofthecheese]

I used to be more like parent 2 but DH is totally parent 1 and I've slowly started to accept the easy-going way! I think it's because my own mother is an extreme version of parent 2.

[Loyaultemelie]

I'm parent 1 mine are permanently filthy. If there's mud, dust, puddles or a sheugh they'll find it in a mile radius. We occasionally powerhose them if being exposed to polite company (thankfully all but one of their friends are equally free range, that friend is always slightly horrified by how we let ours get filthy without stressing about clothes or shoes, her DM always has her dressed beautifully though so I can see why)

[Weepingwillows12]

I am somewhere in the middle. Happy for the kids to get muddy and wet if they are wearing the right clothes, which is most of the time, and I can get them changed if needed so I might say no on the way to the shops as dragging grumpy wet kids around would be hell. I think its important for puddle play but actually sometimes I cant be arsed with the clean up job.

I know one parent 2 type but she dresses her little girl up in totally impractical clothes that look pretty and are all designer. I get why she doesnt want to ruin them but do feel sorry for the girl sometimes.

[TheLovelinessOfDemons]

My DM and my aunts are like this, wiping DD2's face after every spoonful when she was a baby, which just causes mealtime battles, saying with nervous laughter "He's got his hands in it", when DS1 was a baby, whether he was eating cheesy mixed vegetables or Marmite fingers. I'm not sure how else he was supposed to eat the Marmite fingers.....

[TheLovelinessOfDemons]

@caughtinanet

Which culture doesn't allow children to get dirty? What a shame for those children

When my youngest was at primary they'd done some kind of activity with an outside provider and when I picked my child up the leader apologised profusely for how dirty the school uniform was, the teacher who known me for some time by then just laughed and said she really doesn't care about a messy uniform. I said to the leader, why would I? I have a washing machine

Whatever culture the children I've seen in pristine white belong to. Why would anyone dress their small child in that?

[lljkk]

Parent 0? Like Parent 1 but I don't bring spare clothes in case of dirt.

I've observed some parents in parks or playgrounds scolding preschoolers for getting even a little dirt on their clothes. I can't relate to decision to put them in "best" outfits for pushing a scooter across the park.

[35andThriving]

I am a parent 2.

[Kanaloa]

It depends where we are and the age of the children. At preschool age out for lunch I wouldn’t allow my kids to deliberately get themselves mucky.

The next day, at the park, they can swim through the mud. Needs to be a good balance I think.

[Kanaloa]

I would also dress them in the appropriate clothes at the park, so their overalls/rain clothes, rather than allowing them to get good clothes dirty.

[Maggiesgirl]

I'm parent 1. My Ds was always mucky, and thankfully DDIL brings up DGD the same.
I was a CM and the day that my minders still talk about 20 years later was the day we went to Lulworth cove and they made a slide up the edge if the cliff. It was about 4ft high, and made of clay. One of the girls found a empty plastic bottle and was tipping water down it, so it became liquid clay. The 6 children were aged between 3 and 10.
It was October half term and we had gone in waterproofs. It was really warm though so they had stripped off to their jeans and jumpers.
They had to go into the toilets on the way back to the car and strip down to their knickers and put their waterproofs on before I would let them back into the car.
I have never seen such mucky kids. They had a whale of a time though.
I did make them all have a shower and put clean clothes on when we finally got home though. ( The 3 year old ended up in the kitchen sink, she was tiny)

[Bunnycat101]

Depends on circumstances really. I send my children to forest school and when playing outside I expect them to get messy. But, if I was out for lunch somewhere, I’d expect them to be sitting down nicely. If there was a play area then fine but I wouldn’t be ok with then getting wet and muddy during lunch.

[Crazysheep]

Parent 1. I have fond memories of attending an outdoor play group with my DC. I was digging a new planting area while DD sat in another planter eating the tomatoes off the plants. For some odd reason despite having been raised like this she still panics when she gets dirty. I tell her daily it's fine, we have a washing machine and I'm a stain removal expert. A dirty kid is a happy kid in my eyes.