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Do you let your child play in the dirt?

179 replies

GoldBar · 24/07/2021 07:03

Just curious to know what other parents' views on this are.

I was out last week with two parents with different approaches (mine is somewhere in the middle). We were sitting having coffee in an outside cafe with a garden and small play area, with grass, dirt and muddy puddles from sprinklers. Parent 1's children (aged 5 and 3) started playing with stones and twigs in the dirt, building piles of them, and ran through the muddy puddles in the grass and held their hands under the sprinklers, getting wet and filthy. Parent 1 didn't say anything. Parent 2's child (4) went to do the same but Parent 2 told them to come back and sit at the table if they were going to be 'naughty' and not play nicely. Parent 1 smiled and said she was ok with her children getting wet and dirty because they do it all the time and she always brings spare clothes. Parent 2 said she brings spare clothes too but she thinks children should be taught to look after their clothes and not get dirty just for the sake of it.

OP posts:
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HeyGirlHeyBoy · 24/07/2021 09:13

'Unmentionables' Grin

Parent 1 all day every day. They'll be clean and worrying what they look like, being judged by their clothes for long enough. So important for all the reasons mentioned above and I would be Hmm at parent 2 saying something my children were doing was naughty when it absolutely wasn't and I'd make that clear to my children too. But children being dressed beautifully isn't something I'm interested in or impressed by. Different strokes for different folks. I know I probably annoyed friends when I allowed my dc to climb fences and trees etc when theirs weren't allowed but I have a friend who won't allow running on concrete so I go along with it sometimes and sometimes not.

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Crockof · 24/07/2021 09:15

@AbsolutelyPatsy

well the issue for me is the dirt getting in the girls unmentionables

Her vagina? Again poo gets there, and humans evolved without clothing, I really struggle to see the issue.
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GrandPrismatic · 24/07/2021 09:16

I’d love to be parent 1 but I’m naturally more parent 2 (although less arsey about it…I wouldn’t make the kids feel bad for it…sounds like she was being a bit passive aggressive telling parent 1 she thought her kids were naughty through her own child which is pretty horrible)

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AbsolutelyPatsy · 24/07/2021 09:18

@Crockof

well this particular ground may well have had dog poo, duck poo, cig butts,
it has stayed with me but her mum was so relaxed,

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AbsolutelyPatsy · 24/07/2021 09:18

and @Crockof

our own poo gets there, not others, and not other species

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EssentialHummus · 24/07/2021 09:19

I mean, I'd quietly hope that DD wasn't in her nicer clothes that day, but I'd let her get on with it.

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Lemonmelonsun · 24/07/2021 09:21

My dc have always worn nice clothes (usually costing a few £ from charity shops or car boot sales, I love gorgeous second hand etc) but whilst they usually wear what they like, and dressed up I've never bothered about them doing what ever they want in this e clothes probably because they were so cheap no matter how dressed up they were!

We've never really been into sort of hiking clothes..

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Bitofachinwag · 24/07/2021 09:24

Dirt=soil? Yes I let mine play with soil.

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DontBuyANewMumCashmere · 24/07/2021 09:30

Where does everyone stand on letting their kids touch/play/drink old water?!

I have a nearly 2yo who is obsessed with drinking any dirty water he can. He is given plenty of proper drinks through the day but given the chance to drink tap water from a cup, or dirty water that's been in a puddle out of an old watering can, will choose the latter every time!
I try to stop him when I can but if he's a bit further away I can't physically prevent him every time.
The poor boy is either going to get pretty sick soon, or have the immune system of an ox! Blush

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Arthurianna · 24/07/2021 09:35

I would say to my Dc if you want to get wet/dirty then you need to be wearing the right clothes first.

I prefer putting protective clothing on before the activity and keeping clothes dry, rather than having to change.

If Dc refuse the right clothes, then they can't always do the activity.

So if you have chosen to wear your trainers and not bring your wellies, then you can't walk in puddles, even if your sibling is smugly skipping through them in his wellies.

If you want to go on the slide and it's wet, you need to put your waterproofs on first.

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noblegreenk · 24/07/2021 09:36

I'm the same a parent 1. If kids want to be kids and get messy/dirty, then I let them. It's their way of exploring the world.

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AbsolutelyPatsy · 24/07/2021 09:37

perhaps parent 2 had her reasons for keeping her children clean

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JoborPlay · 24/07/2021 09:39

I'm definitely parent 1. Even in party clothes.

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Brown76 · 24/07/2021 09:42

I’m in between. I like them doing it in the woods when wearing wellies etc but I’d stop them if we were in a cafe/wearing new shoes etc.

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Shutupyoutart · 24/07/2021 09:44

We have a saying that I have to sometimes remind dh of "a messy child is a happy child" It's how they learn , through play and explore the world around them so I'm totally parent 1 unless it was a wedding or something like that. Feel sad for parent 2s child being labelled as naughty for wanting to play and explore

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JoborPlay · 24/07/2021 09:44

@AbsolutelyPatsy

well the issue for me is the dirt getting in the girls unmentionables

Her vagina? What's unmentionable about that? And that's what baths are for.
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FlatteredFool · 24/07/2021 09:51

A child that gets grimy and muddy is a child who has had fun and is allowed to learn through exploration of their environment.

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riotlady · 24/07/2021 09:53

Parent 1. I was a very cautious child when it came to anything physical or sensory (fussy eater, scared to jump off things, didn’t want to touch any “unusual” textures like mud) and it makes me really happy to see DD exploring the world so confidently and curiously

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avocadotofu · 24/07/2021 09:54

I'm parent 1 too. Who cares if their clothes get dirty??

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AbsolutelyPatsy · 24/07/2021 09:54

however there are children who dont like to get dirty

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MackenCheese · 24/07/2021 09:57

Parent 1....and for goodness sake stop dressing little children in expensive clothing that you then need to worry about!

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BiddyPop · 24/07/2021 10:04

Parent 1

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allwrongitsallwrong · 24/07/2021 10:07

Parent 1 - a mucky kid is a happy kid!
Its sensory play, creative play, social play, fine motor skills and gross motor skills play. Its building up their immune systems. Its helping children to enjoy and appreciate the natural world.

So no, its not getting dirty ' for the sake of it'. Cannot understand parent 2 at all.

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Cocopopsss · 24/07/2021 10:07

I am in between leaning towards parent 1. Yes kids clothes can be changed but sometimes it is a faff. Also I guess I am from a culture where clothes are an expense so although I don’t put special or expensive clothes on my kids all the time or if we are going to the park etc it would seem wasteful to get clothes dirty just for the sake of it. But that’s my mindset that needs changing. Also it my culture, having a messy kid in front of others is a sign of failed parenting 😆 but I “failed” on that part ages ago.

Lastly my youngest has eczema so mud, water etc would make it worse and I do limit him.

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allwrongitsallwrong · 24/07/2021 10:09

but she thinks children should be taught to look after their clothes and not get dirty

The clothes are for the child, not the child for the clothes.

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