Do you let your child play in the dirt?

[GoldBar]

Just curious to know what other parents' views on this are.

I was out last week with two parents with different approaches (mine is somewhere in the middle). We were sitting having coffee in an outside cafe with a garden and small play area, with grass, dirt and muddy puddles from sprinklers. Parent 1's children (aged 5 and 3) started playing with stones and twigs in the dirt, building piles of them, and ran through the muddy puddles in the grass and held their hands under the sprinklers, getting wet and filthy. Parent 1 didn't say anything. Parent 2's child (4) went to do the same but Parent 2 told them to come back and sit at the table if they were going to be 'naughty' and not play nicely. Parent 1 smiled and said she was ok with her children getting wet and dirty because they do it all the time and she always brings spare clothes. Parent 2 said she brings spare clothes too but she thinks children should be taught to look after their clothes and not get dirty just for the sake of it.

[MindyStClaire]

Parent 1 in a park or garden, parent 2 in a cafe.

[whychangethehabitofalifetime]

I would be a mix of both. I wouldn't let my (5 and 2) year old play in the dirt and mud when we're out having a coffee, no. But I wouldn't say it's not playing nicely or naughty, I just don't want the hassle of cleaning them up unnecessarily when we're out and I wouldn't want them tramping mud into a cafe or onto seats. If we're having a coffee somewhere they they are expected to sit nicely with me (and play quietly if they like at the table).

However if we were at home, or at a park etc then I'd be fine with them getting messy. They're always digging in the garden for worms and getting filthy.

Just a balance, isn't it.

[Foghead]

I’m parent 1 mostly but not if we’d gone out to a cafe or somewhere to eat.

[AbsolutelyPatsy]

someone i knew was letting her child play knicker-less in the dirt, nappy training, mum was proud of herself , i have never got over the vision of the girl sitting in the earth with no knickers on,
the sand on the beach i might have felt differently about... but i guess that is an extreme example

[SquashMinusIsShit]

@Dontforgetyourbrolly

No I don't, but I wish I could. I have cleaning ocd and to give you a bit of background I woke at 3am after a nightmare about dirty houses! I wish I wasn't like this 😕
However ds gets his fix of dirt at my mums and she lets him run feral in her garden lol
When ds was a baby he was always pristine , crazy I know. We do have lots of fun but I wish I could let go when it came to mess / dirt

I hope you are ok, OCD must be so hard to deal with/manage. Your DS will have have great memories of messy play at grandma's when he's older

[Ylvamoon]

Definitely parent 1.

(DS once played happily sitting in a muddy puddle while his nappy got soaked to bursting- he was only 2 but really happy so justlet him be.
Nowadays he likes clean light colour clothes- he is 11 and very into how he looks hair gel and all)

[SquashMinusIsShit]

@AbsolutelyPatsy

someone i knew was letting her child play knicker-less in the dirt, nappy training, mum was proud of herself , i have never got over the vision of the girl sitting in the earth with no knickers on,
the sand on the beach i might have felt differently about... but i guess that is an extreme example

Surely sand would be worse to sit on if it gets in any creases?! It would be like an emory board!

[AbsolutelyPatsy]

oh true @SquashMinusIsShit
just the sand gets the sea water on it

[GoldBar]

@AbsolutelyPatsy. I think that's a step too far. We have a 'minimum pants' rule in public (and usually a t-shirt in the sun to prevent sunburn). I would let my DC run around in their pants at a splash or water park if I had forgotten to bring swim stuff but that's as far as I would go. No clothes is for the back garden only.

[Crockof]

@AbsolutelyPatsy

someone i knew was letting her child play knicker-less in the dirt, nappy training, mum was proud of herself , i have never got over the vision of the girl sitting in the earth with no knickers on,
the sand on the beach i might have felt differently about... but i guess that is an extreme example

What's the issue here, pants are a relatively new invention, what damage is dirt going to do that excrement wouldn't?

[AbsolutelyPatsy]

well the issue for me is the dirt getting in the girls unmentionables

[Comedycook]

I don't care about mud and dirt....I am generally paranoid in those situations about them coming across dog poo, cigarette buts and other unsavoury litter, so would be likely to hover, scan the ground and wipe hands afterwards. I couldn't care less about dirty clothes though

[Lemonmelonsun]

I don't classify soil as dirt


To me dirt is a residue of things like running your finger along a car, the pavement dirt...

Soil is soil? Earth?

Yes and no.. Re soil but in terms of clothes getting dirty, that's never concenerd me in the slightest no matter what they are doing wearing.

[billiebeeme]

I'm def not parent 1. There is a time and a place and a cafe is not it. I don't mind if she gets a bit dirty children often do but I don't want her getting wet and covered in mud and transferring it to the car. The parent shldnt have said it was naughty though.

[whattodo2019]

100% yes. To be honest, my
kids played with mud and stones
much more than toys. Why would t
you

[Redbottle]

Parent 2 by nature but managed to force myself to be parent 1.

[Disneyblue]

As a teacher with experience in early years, children absolutely NEED to get dirty - it's part of their exploratory learning.

[woodfort]

It took a long time for my first child to ever want to play with mud and twigs and things without crying every time he got a tiny bit of soil on him. I tried to encourage it gently.
2nd child is constantly covered in mud and dirt. She isn’t happy if she isn’t dirty. I think it’s great.

[woodfort]

And in the garden they are both naked (and DC2 covered in soil) about 95% of the time. 🤷‍♀️

[Lemonmelonsun]

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER
I actually had an argument with my head teacher at primary school about this, at lunch I was sat with a teeny stick scratching it into a patch of "earth" he kept calling it dirt! I was so confused, I kept saying, it's soil, it's earth!

[Lau52]

Parent 1, the more mud the better. I used to love mud and puddles, snails, worms… when growing up and all my kids been the same. I love watching this kind of play and kids enjoy it so much. Did read once great for building kids immune system so if you don’t mind clean up then just let them explore.

[Lemonmelonsun]

Parent 2 is stifling her childs development, if anyone knows the early years foundation stage, it is actually important to development that children explore their environment and learn through play.
I've also seen the results in my adult dh who was raised in a show home highly controlled regulated environment, it's been horrendous to witness.

So I would have struggled to bite my tongue with parent 2, she is stunting her child's development and calling normal play naughty is also dreadful.
She needs to research and learn about how to parent fast.
I'm personally sick of seeing dh unable to enjoy any present he is given because he's too concerned with getting rid of the wrapping paper quickly. this brain wash training never really leaves people.

[GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER]

@Lemonmelonsun, I think it’s routinely called ‘dirt’ in America. Heathens! 😂

[Topofthepopicles]

100% with parent 1 (unless we are on our way to a wedding or something!)

[Lemonmelonsun]

@IHateCoronavirus

It's not just your natural opinion it's fact based on countless studies, philosophies, papers etc
...children learn through play, all types of play.

It's why I cringe when I also read about mums who can't allow dc to mix up toys when the child doesn't even see them as separate! Or they have to stop and take shoes on and off on a normal dry day coming in and out the garden.