I’ve discovered today that it is wrong, very wrong, to eat chocolate hobnobs with the chocolate side facing down

[Americam]

I mean, don’t get me wrong, I managed to force myself to eat them. But it’s not a natural way to proceed.

I don’t know why I didn’t turn them the right way up either - all I can say in my defence is I felt duty bound to prove that it was a rule that applied to each and every hobnob, not just the odd one here and there.

There are youtube clips showing biscuits on a mesh conveyor belt going through a shallow bath of chocolate which coats the bottom of the biscuit. I watch this sort of thing for hours sometimes.

@ahoyshipmates

Did they address the chocolate on the top or bottom issue?

Yes, they did.

Would you like me to tell you?

Most certainly. Can you confirm if the rumours about the chocolate placement are malicious?

You have all missed the point entirely. The chocolate goes at the bottom because if you can't see it the calories don't count.

@Chocolatier9a

The chocolate obviously. needs to face down so that there is maximum chocolate to tongue contact. What is the point of putting all that lovely chocolate against the roof of your mouth?

Tut!

You can lick the chocolate off much more elegantly if it’s on the top. I had such a job of it today.

Is this one of those life secrets that the whole world has known about forever and not bothered telling me?

No it's the kind of knowledge that is gained after a lot of practise. You just haven't reached that level of self taught through practise biscuit eating knowledge. Perhaps some work experience at Mc Vities would be useful for you OP?

They've got to be bottom-up to be eaten though.

Chocolate has no place on a hobnob anyway.

@Bitofachinwag

Is this one of those life secrets that the whole world has known about forever and not bothered telling me?

No it's the kind of knowledge that is gained after a lot of practise. You just haven't reached that level of self taught through practise biscuit eating knowledge. Perhaps some work experience at Mc Vities would be useful for you OP?

Yes please. But is 56 too old to do work experience?

The chocolate has to go on the bottom so that the DCs think I’m eating plain biscuits - more for me!

I'd imagine you had to eat at least one whole packet before coming to your conclusion OP?

I cannot Now unsee what I have seen on this thread. Chocolate on top anything else is new age subversion. Thank you for a ruined evening.

Taste buds on tongue, they’re way better chocolate down (like toast, butter down)

Yes please. But is 56 too old to do work experience?
Not at all. You need to prepared properly for all those pensioners' tea and biscuits meet-ups, bingo, flower arranging club meetings etc you'll be going to soon. Just imagine the embarrassment if you were thrown out of the village hall for eating your biscuit upside down. You wouldn't want that to happen, would you?

I'm sorry what? On the bottom?
You're all talking mad dog shite.

Where do we stand on dunking?

Dunking chocolate biscuits is wrong, who wants melty chocolate. If you aren't quick enough it might slide off.
Unless it's Cadburys chocolate fingers. That's allowed.

Oh come on people. If it was a plain hobnob the non-chocolate covered side aka known as the bottom would be the bottom. But when it's covered in chocolate that then by default becomes the top and the original top side is demoted to bottom. Easy peasy.

@ahoyshipmates

Where do we stand on dunking?

What temperature is your tea? If it's very hot the chocolate melts before the biscuit part has a chance to reach ultimate dunkedness. Dunking is best reserved for plain biscuits really.

I think you posted in the wrong section because YABVVU! Hobnobs are just really sad flapjacks and its always gotta be chocolate side down, that's where taste buds are!!

I'm on a self imposed sweets ban

So I'll have to live vicariously through you all. Tell me more about this biscuit factory ahoyshipmates. Fwiw, I also vote for choccie side down for maximum tongue exposure. Has anyone tried Aldis chocolate covered cookies? Enrobed, they're called. Delicious.

Ok just fucking stop.

You are all wantonly disregarding the threat of the tragic loss of chocolate should the biscuit suddenly crumble.
Chocolate on top, crumb loss is far better than chocolate chunk loss.
Come on. Think people, think.
Rolls eyes and mutters behind mask…FFS.

@YouLookSoCool

I'd imagine you had to eat at least one whole packet before coming to your conclusion OP?

Yes, only one packet.

One packet today that is.

@Muminabun

I cannot Now unsee what I have seen on this thread. Chocolate on top anything else is new age subversion. Thank you for a ruined evening.

I’m sorry mum. It’s best you know now though, you don’t want to get to my age and have to do work experience

@warmfluffytowels

Chocolate hobnobs don't taste as good as they used to

I agree. However...

This thread fills me with dread. We only just got rid of Trump & the threat he posed to world peace. Now you lot are threatening it again, like the Lilliputians & Blefuscans, with their argument about eggs.

@Bitofachinwag

Yes please. But is 56 too old to do work experience? Not at all. You need to prepared properly for all those pensioners' tea and biscuits meet-ups, bingo, flower arranging club meetings etc you'll be going to soon. Just imagine the embarrassment if you were thrown out of the village hall for eating your biscuit upside down. You wouldn't want that to happen, would you?

I’m not going to any of those things, you only get two biscuits at a time.