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Original poster

Should DS go to school on no sleep?

80 replies

33feethighandrising · 28/06/2021 06:48

DS (age 12) has just woken me up to get ready for school and has said he hasn't slept all night.

He's autistic and often has trouble sleeping, but I strongly suspect he's been on his phone all night.

He says he wants to go to school and it's not the first time.

But, surely he shouldn't go to school if he's been up all night?

(I'm not sure I believe him he's done it before. I think I'd have heard about it as he likes to talk about how little he sleeps).

I'm going to have to go back to taking his phone off him as he obviously can't be trusted to have the phone in his room and I do understand what a temptation it is, plus we've been to the doctor about it) but I'm not really asking for help with that - just, would you send him in today?

I don't believe him he's been up all night before btw as I can't think of a morning when I didn't have to get him out if bed at 7:30.

OP posts:
ViewFromTheSteeple · 28/06/2021 06:53

Can you not look at his phone history to check his activity? That way you know whether this lack of sleep was self inflicted?

Temp023 · 28/06/2021 06:53

Send him in, of course,

bloodywhitecat · 28/06/2021 06:55

Yes he goes to school.

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Original poster
33feethighandrising · 28/06/2021 06:55

@ViewFromTheSteeple

Can you not look at his phone history to check his activity? That way you know whether this lack of sleep was self inflicted?
I tried, but he's been on apps not his browser (probably YouTube) so there's no history on the browser and I'm too tired to work out how to see the app history - does anyone know?

He's woken me up a hour early which I'm not at all happy with!

OP posts:
SpaceRaiders · 28/06/2021 06:56

I’d send him in.

Bagelsandbrie · 28/06/2021 06:56

Of course send him in.

My son is 9 and has complex autism / learning disabilities and attends complex needs school. He usually sleeps 1-3 hours a night. If I kept him off every time he didn’t sleep he’d never go in! Grin He does have melatonin to help him sleep but it doesn’t always work.

I would say if your son is aware enough to know that he has school and that if he sits up on his phone all night he’s going to feel tired the next day then it’s a good learning curve for him to go to school!

princesslarmadrama · 28/06/2021 06:57

No 12 year old can be trusted with a phone at night autistic or not. Take it away or a night and send him in.

BertieBotts · 28/06/2021 06:59

Yes of course! Why wouldn't you send him in? It's his own fault if he's tired.

If you put Google family link on the phone it tells you what has been used. Otherwise look at the battery page in the settings and it will tell you which apps have been using the battery so which ones have been being used.

LynetteScavo · 28/06/2021 07:00

Yes, he should go to school.

No 12yo should have their phone overnight.

roadtosomewhere · 28/06/2021 07:00

Well I was going to say no don't send him in, but on reading your post yes.,He needs to go to school.

Original poster
33feethighandrising · 28/06/2021 07:02

No 12yo should have their phone overnight

As I said in the OP, I am already going to take the phone off him at night. Please can this thread not turn into 100 posters telling me to do this? I don't need advice about that, I'm asking about sending him in today.

OP posts:
TheLovelinessOfDemons · 28/06/2021 07:02

Yes send him in. If DD decides to stay up until 1, she still has to go to school.

Cattitudes · 28/06/2021 07:03

Under those circumstances I think I would send him in. School can send him home if they are concerned. If he had been up all night coughing (pre covid) or with anxiety about bullying my respose might be different but it isn't as if he is doing work that lives depend on and he might learn from the experience.

Lockdownbear · 28/06/2021 07:04

I'd send him in. However I'd also be looking at a way of locking his phone to stop him faffing all night.

Google Family Link works on tablets. I imagine it will work on phone too.

Original poster
33feethighandrising · 28/06/2021 07:04

@TheLovelinessOfDemons

Yes send him in. If DD decides to stay up until 1, she still has to go to school.
He hasn't stayed up till 1 though, he's literally not slept at all.
OP posts:
herewegoagain26 · 28/06/2021 07:05

Yes I'd send him in too, natural consequences. Staying awake all night playing on his phone = a long, tiring day in school.

Original poster
33feethighandrising · 28/06/2021 07:07

If you put Google family link on the phone it tells you what has been used

I have family link, linked to his Google account but it doesn't give me any info. DD's profile does tell me what she's doing. I must have not set it up properly on his.

I will today, thanks for the reminder, that's useful

OP posts:
Ilovecrumpets · 28/06/2021 07:09

I think it depends how no sleep will affect his behaviour at school?

I have a son with ADHD and I wouldn’t send him in on no sleep at all to his mainstream school. The potential behaviour effects and then impact of that ( on his classmates but also on his own self esteem) isn’t worth a day at school.

0None0 · 28/06/2021 07:09

Of course he goes in to school. Why wouldn’t he?

plentyoftea · 28/06/2021 07:11

Definitely send him in, he's not ill he just hasn't slept because he chose to be on his phone - the consequence of that is he is v tired at school. Next time he may realise it's best not to do that - whereas if you don't send him in then that becomes an excuse that can be used anytime he doesn't want to go to school.

Budgetating · 28/06/2021 07:17

I must have not set it up properly on his
Or you did and he managed to change it.

I'd send him in. But my DS is always trying to figure out ways to get out of school and if he knows staying up all night will get him a day off school, he'll try it again.

Mumdiva99 · 28/06/2021 07:19

Of course send him in. He's not driving or operating dangerous machinery.

If he stays home what will he do all day?

If school think there's an issue they can call you.

bonbonours · 28/06/2021 07:21

Yes send him in. We use screen time app which locks down phones so they can't be used overnight. It also shows you on your phone what apps they have used and for how long.

covidcloser · 28/06/2021 07:23

I kept mine off on more than one occasion when he hadn't slept all night. He is also autistic and would have been an absolute waste of time sending him to school in such a state. It probably happened 5/6 times over his whole school career, no lasting effects. Best decision all round at the time.

NCnotmyusualone · 28/06/2021 07:23

Send him in. If you look on the battery part in the phone settings it tells you how much it’s been used in the last 24 hours.

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