Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Weeing behind a bush in the park

115 replies

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 20/06/2021 20:49

To be clear up front; I am neither the person weeing nor the person complaining . Just seen this on a local FB page and thought MN might like to debate this one.

Local park, where there are toilets but not predictable if/when they will be open.

Busy local FB page, someone posted along the lines of 'if you were the woman weeing behind a bush in xxx park today when my children might have seen you with your trousers down, I hope you are ashamed of yourself'

Very mixed responses.... before I share them (or my personal thoughts), what do you think?

OP posts:
avamiah · 21/06/2021 02:55

I used to run many years ago and I did half marathons and was lucky that I got to run the London Marathon Once.
Let me tell you that when you need to go you have to go and i have been behind a bush, tree many times and been very discreet, it’s no big thing.

Kittensat36 · 22/06/2021 03:12

I went for a walk on Sunday and despite having gone before I left, I had to go twice. I can go from the first twitch to doing the pissodoble in 5 mins. No idea where the nearest loos were - possibly at Tesco a 10 minute bus ride away. Did get a bum full of Holly for my trouble.

I often have issues with this, get to the supermarket on my way home and have to go before I start. Was challenged once by a guard - "mAdAm, they are for customers only." I said of course, absolutely, but I went first because I thought he'd be a bit upset if I wet myself in the veggie aisle and left a puddle. He had to concede my point.

MyMabel · 22/06/2021 03:19

Hm, I’ve wee’d in bushes, in the first ect. But I can’t imagine how you get in the situation where you can run off to find somewhere a little more secluded than a park that has children running around.

If it were a man stood in a bush in a children’s park with his genitals out weeing, there would uproar.. rightfully so. Should be the same for women.. at the end of the day it is indecent exposure in a ill-picked area.

AutoGroup · 22/06/2021 06:22

I'd do it in a country park type place if necessary, although I'd hope to find a spot where no one would see. I'd avoid if at all possible in a town park with swings type scenario.

I do have a friend who will literally go anywhere if needed and I don't like it, but I also think people who will never have a wild wee are a bit odd.

Soubriquet · 22/06/2021 07:02

When you gotta go, you gotta go

I would rather squat behind a bush, then take two sulking children all the way home early

Livpool · 22/06/2021 07:10

Who would care about this?! Leave the poor woman alone. I doubt it was her fun thing to do that day.

DS is 5 and has done it a few times. Just because it is easier for men/boys isn't the fault of a woman who needs to go.

The person who posted it on Facebook is a weirdo

Original poster
RockingMyFiftiesNot · 22/06/2021 07:43

If it were a man stood in a bush in a children’s park with his genitals out weeing, there would uproar.. rightfully so. Should be the same for women.. at the end of the day it is indecent exposure in a ill-picked area.

I never said it was a children's park. But a man who gets caught short can wee more subtlety and easily hidden than a woman. 'Indecent exposure at an ill picked area' - well I hope to goodness you never find yourself in a situation where the public toilets are closed and you are desperate. Easy to be holier than thou if you've never experienced it.

The post seems to have been deleted from the FB group. I don't think it went the way the lady who posted it expected it to.

OP posts:
TroysMammy · 22/06/2021 14:48

I'd try not to wee behind a bush in a park but weeing in the woods where there are usually less people and more foliage is fine. I've even got a wee cup so I don't get wee over my feet.

However I wouldn't judge and definitely not post on Facebook if someone was caught short and were trying to be discreet about it.

BarbaraofSeville · 22/06/2021 15:25

@MyMabel

Hm, I’ve wee’d in bushes, in the first ect. But I can’t imagine how you get in the situation where you can run off to find somewhere a little more secluded than a park that has children running around.

If it were a man stood in a bush in a children’s park with his genitals out weeing, there would uproar.. rightfully so. Should be the same for women.. at the end of the day it is indecent exposure in a ill-picked area.

Umm for it to be indecent exposure hasn't there got to be intent to intimidate or threaten?

Men expose themselves because they get off on knowing that this upsets or frightens people who see them.

Almost no women having a discreet piss because otherwise they'll likely wet themselves are doing it to commit indecent exposure, simply that women's biology makes it far more difficult to urinate discreetly.

I would definitely judge anyone looking to shame the actions of what was likely to be a desperate and embarrassed woman. She was probably trying to hold it for ages before she gave in and went like that.

Many women find insufficient public toilet provision seriously limits their freedom.

NiceGerbil · 22/06/2021 15:28

I've seen men having a piss in public loads of times. I've also been flashed at more than once.

Small clues to tell the difference are:

Has he got his back to the area where people might be, and is standing close to s tree or wall?

If it's on the high street or somewhere not very subtle, is there s load of water strangely appearing and leaving s stream down the pavement?

Clues like these can indicate that he's urinating.

Is he standing facing you or others, almost certainly women/ girls. And his penis is erect? Very possibly with a hand wanking it?

Clues like these can indicate that he's committing indecent exposure.

I mean women are pretty stupid obviously.. But we have special handbooks for girls given to us early on so that we can try to tell the difference with this sort of thing.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 22/06/2021 15:31

I think it's a bit grim to be honest.

Toucantweet · 22/06/2021 15:50

Ha ha - the delights of Sale, M33 Wink
The park is huge with lots of mature bushes, trees and secluded areas (in addition to the unreliable loos!). Plenty of opportunity for a discreet wee if desperately needed - well away from any play areas. The woman who posted the comment was rightly shot down in flames..... and no, I wasn't the poster or the pee-er!

Chesneyhawkes1 · 22/06/2021 16:01

I've done it and I'll do it again. Pelvic radiotherapy left me with a weak bladder. Sometimes I get little notice and can't hold it as well as I used to.

Sparrowsong · 22/06/2021 16:04

You haven’t lived until you’ve seen someone, buttocks akimbo, curling one out in full view of everyone outside Tottenham Court Road Odeon!

Peeing behind a bush is nothing.

Original poster
RockingMyFiftiesNot · 22/06/2021 16:13

@Toucantweet

Ha ha - the delights of Sale, M33 Wink The park is huge with lots of mature bushes, trees and secluded areas (in addition to the unreliable loos!). Plenty of opportunity for a discreet wee if desperately needed - well away from any play areas. The woman who posted the comment was rightly shot down in flames..... and no, I wasn't the poster or the pee-er!
Ha that'll teach me to be more careful about what I post on MN!
OP posts:
3Britnee · 22/06/2021 16:16

@RockingMyFiftiesNot

To be clear up front; I am neither the person weeing nor the person complaining . Just seen this on a local FB page and thought MN might like to debate this one.

Local park, where there are toilets but not predictable if/when they will be open.

Busy local FB page, someone posted along the lines of 'if you were the woman weeing behind a bush in xxx park today when my children might have seen you with your trousers down, I hope you are ashamed of yourself'

Very mixed responses.... before I share them (or my personal thoughts), what do you think?

I'd think do those children not remove their trousers to piss 🙄
Oblomov21 · 22/06/2021 16:33

No big deal to me. I certainly wouldn't tell woman she should be ashamed. I can't even remember the last time I did it, 30 years ago?, but really what is the thing. Bet anyone passing could see practically nothing, at all. So why the big deal?

user1471538283 · 22/06/2021 16:54

I'm the least likely person to ever do this but I have twice. If there are no facilities and you've got to go youve got to go. I would rather use the facilities though.

dottiedodah · 22/06/2021 16:59

For the life of me ,I cant see any problem here! There are no toilets open in the park near me .They are locked all the time! This begs the question that if caught short what do you do? Children are hardly going to be traumitised for life FFS!

YellowFish12 · 22/06/2021 17:02

I'd rather NOT see someone weeing behind a bush, just like I would rather not wee behind a bush myself - but if it is a choice between that and wetting ones self, I would much rather the bush was used!

I see men pissing against trees or walls all the fucking time.

coffeeandjuice · 22/06/2021 17:08

Whoever posted that oh fb has a complete lack of understanding of what we're all enduring one way or another this year. They definitely are in the camp of trying to make them self feel big by making others feel small.

I've had to pee in a bush this year, it's hard not to when all the sodding toilets are closed and there's a baby pushing on your bladder. (This was winter).

Maybe I should find the fb post and "out" my self as a covid- bush pee-er in solidarity to the poor woman who's had to endure this humiliation

Katkinsgreyy · 22/06/2021 17:14

I usually carry a shewee with me if I know I'm going to be out somewhere with no access to toilets.
It's not ideal but it is certainly better than feeling uncomfortable.

Original poster
RockingMyFiftiesNot · 22/06/2021 17:23

Maybe I should find the fb post and "out" my self as a covid- bush pee-er in solidarity to the poor woman who's had to endure this humiliation

Yup, I've had to wee in a park before now - well hidden - so i really felt for the woman. I can only hope she didn't see it on FB. Initially views were mixed, but when I went back a little later they were overwhelmingly in favour of the wee-er. Couldn't find it when I went back again to post in the thread myself, think it might have been removed. The complaining person obviously wasn't anonymous so perhaps had been educated and withdrew gracefully.

OP posts:
NiceGerbil · 22/06/2021 19:44

Thing is that women are in a difficult position here.

The urinary leash is a well recognised thing.

Public toilets were being closed all over the place even pre covid to save money.

Men can and do have a quick pee in public which is much easier and less exposing for them.

Women, not the same.

We also have all this extra stuff that makes us need to see more often.

Pregnancy
Post childbirth incontinence of various levels and for various periods of time
And as you get older women tend to need to wee more often as well

So the choice if it's a no no means s lot of women restricting their lives just in case they get caught short

It means I suppose that if you have a toddler and a baby, then for some taking the toddler to the park is not possible.

And that's rubbish.

If we're not going to get facilities so we can go to the loo, then it seems obnoxious to say we can't go al fresco either! In a park behind a bush. She didn't want anyone to see. She got caught short. Alternative is to wet herself which is surely way worse.

Yep he was horrible. And I bet he wouldn't have Facebook shamed a local big strong man like that for the same thing.

Original poster
RockingMyFiftiesNot · 22/06/2021 19:49

Yep he was horrible. And I bet he wouldn't have Facebook shamed a local big strong man like that for the same thing.

It was another woman who posted on Facebook !

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread