Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

What excuse can I give for being in hospital for a couple of days?

96 replies

EuroSpark · 01/05/2021 10:09

Please don't flame me! I'm having a facelift later this month which is going to require a two night hospital stay, after which there's going to be bruising for a while.

I don't want anyone to know except family so what can I say to friends about my hiding away? Work isn't a problem as I've taken annual leave but my friends know I have this leave coming up. They'll know I'm not actually away anywhere so what can I say?!

Thank you.

OP posts:
tara66 · 01/05/2021 11:33

In growing toe nails can be a big problem. i think a certain beautiful cook used it to isolate. But doesn't the bruising etc last for some time ?

Standrewsschool · 01/05/2021 11:37

“Having a procedure”.

Covers a multitude of sins

megletthesecond · 01/05/2021 11:38

They're going to notice. My aunt had one a few years ago, it's not a wind tunnel look but it's clearly not just fillers.

Impacted wisdom teeth do mash your face up quite a bit so it would work for a while.

toconclude · 01/05/2021 11:39

@WorraLiberty

Honestly OP, I'd be working on my self-esteem if I were you.

It's no-one's business how you spend your own money. The sooner you make peace with that the better.

THIS

Either you feel you can, ultimately, justify it or not. If not, trying to lay the blame on others - who you say, OP, won't actually care - is a bit dishonest.

victoriaspongecake · 01/05/2021 11:41

But surely you want them to notice or the procedure hasn’t worked and you’ve wasted your money?

Embracingthechaos · 01/05/2021 11:42

100% go with the wisdom teeth.

It's something hidden so no one will know there's been no changes there, it will explain any swelling or bruising, and it's kind of boring so most people will forget pretty quickly and not ask you for any details.

Original poster
EuroSpark · 01/05/2021 11:48

I'm doing it for me not for anyone else so no, I don't want them to notice.

I don't think it's dishonest to want to keep something I feel embarrassed about to myself.

I agree with all the remarks about self esteem - it's a long standing problem stemming from childhood, and one I'm trying to (and have tried) to address. I don't expect the facelift to fix the problem, I do think and hope it will help though.

OP posts:
dontgobaconmyheart · 01/05/2021 11:49

No judgement here OP and all the best for it and a swift healing process but I don't get the need to lie. They'll find out, you will look different, noticeably so and if you start lying about having had medical operations and are quiet, you'd think most people would 'pop over' to check on you. Bruising may well last longer than your annual leave and it is hardly appropriate to claim you've had an accident etc. I'd worry the stress of the tangled web would be worse than just saying (when or if asked) that you've had some work done, because you have. When people say you look nice/younger/different are you going to pretend it's new skincare or something vague? I'm not sure it will be believable or that that is a helpful thing.

I'd be a little hurt if a good friend felt they needed to lie to me about something like this, especially if the rationale was that they didn't think I was mature or reasonable enough to not be jealous about the money spent. I'd have wanted to support a friend and see if they needed anything afterwards!

sunsetsand · 01/05/2021 11:51

Honestly, all this fuss and apparent embarrassment about spending your own money "in these difficult times" Confused

You've saved it, you spend it. Why are your friends popping in unannounced every two minutes anyway?

toconclude · 01/05/2021 12:02

@EuroSpark

I'm doing it for me not for anyone else so no, I don't want them to notice.

I don't think it's dishonest to want to keep something I feel embarrassed about to myself.

I agree with all the remarks about self esteem - it's a long standing problem stemming from childhood, and one I'm trying to (and have tried) to address. I don't expect the facelift to fix the problem, I do think and hope it will help though.

It's dishonest to try and put your embarrassment onto someone else though. Own it and make your decision.
Hollywolly1 · 01/05/2021 12:04

You could say you are having a sinus operation because that would leave bruising.,just an 💡

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 01/05/2021 12:05

Wisdom teeth removal as an excuse is all very well until you actually need your wisdom teeth removed Grin

Or if you've already had them removed .

"I thought you'd had yours done 70 about 20 years ago. You had a face like a hamster"

Erm , they grew back honest ! Wink.

Hollywolly1 · 01/05/2021 12:06

Actually you know what life's to short so what if your having a face lift,if you just say it why would anyone care shouldn't they be delighted for you when its your wish.
It's like this everyone has something

Bluetrews25 · 01/05/2021 12:08

Please be aware, OP, that changing your appearance NEVER works to change how you feel about yourself. I worked in Eating Disorders for long enough to figure that one out. It doesn't work in cases of body dysmorphia, either.
By all means have your facelift, but only if you want to change your appearance. If you want the surgery to change how you feel about yourself you will be very, very disappointed. And probably sick at the savings you wasted in the attempt that might be better spent on therapy.
I'm concerned for you, OP. Flowers

itsgettingwierd · 01/05/2021 12:10

Totally agree re comments about self esteem.

You sound totally lovely and empathetic to people's varying needs.

But you also have to accept you are entitled to save and spend your money how you choose.

And I really hope it does help you feel more confident about yourself. But please work on it on the inside as well as the outside. Because you sound beautiful on the inside and it would be lovely for it to shine more.

And I'd absolutely have some facial work done (teeth and jaw) if I had the cash and will be saving for it as soon as other debts are paid off. So no judgement here!

MrMucker · 01/05/2021 12:13

@Sparklingbrook

Wisdom teeth removal as an excuse is all very well until you actually need your wisdom teeth removed. Grin I had all mine out and only stayed in one night. The bruising was all down my neck after.
Good grief-do they use mole grips or something?
pinkmagnolias · 01/05/2021 12:13

Gyne related or say you are a close contact and have to isolate.

LadyLolaRuben · 01/05/2021 12:13

It's best to lie closest to the truth as possible. Id say I was having dental surgery like impacted wisdom teeth all being removed at once under a general anaesthetic. Then it's around the same part of your body and will account for any slight swelling etc later on

Pepsimirror · 01/05/2021 12:14

How will they know you’re gone? Do they check up on you all the time? I’m confused.

OhShitShit · 01/05/2021 12:14

As someone who has TWICE had people spring a surprise facelift on me (one my grandmother, one my boss) however natural you think it will look... it won’t be unnoticeable and in the early weeks there’s a definite facelift... vibe. You won’t just look rested to people who know you. You’ll look like you’ve had work done.

Anyway then they’ll be shocked and won’t know what to say when they finally do see you, and it will be awkward for all of you.

Just tell them.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 01/05/2021 12:15

Good grief-do they use mole grips or something?

I had a lovely thumb print bruise on my jaw . I had mine done under Local Analgesiia so I was aware of my jaw being held and the effort involved

Hawkins001 · 01/05/2021 12:16

You have been selected for a two day medical trial, that's confidential, Make a fake letter, and a couple of bits of medical information about the trial, ect. Then it would possibly cover your main bases.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 01/05/2021 12:17

I can spell Analgesia , I just have dodgy typing skills Blush

MrsMoastyToasty · 01/05/2021 12:17

"Corrective surgery "....something like a nasal polyp removal.

Georgyporky · 01/05/2021 12:21

I'd tell the truth - you're self-isolating !
They'll assume it's CV.