How awful would your friend’s choice of name have to be before you said something?

[PlanterGents]

DFriend is pregnant with a little girl that’s due and couldn’t think of a name the entire pregnancy (for boy or girl), so found out quite late that she was having another girl.

Anyway, I saw her alongside a few other friends today and she was saying how she really wants something soft sounding yet alternative and unusual. She then announced the bloody name and I was a bit so laughed it off.

Everyone went a bit quiet and then someone else piped up that it’s her choice (the name). I said ‘that isn’t a name, it’s a common word’. Friend then smiled and changed the subject.

Have now had a text from friend that she really loves the name and hopes I’ll come round to it?!

Obviously this thread is completely outing so I’ve name changed so nobody can connect me to any other threads. I’m sure a few of our friendship group use MN, as I’m sure it’s come up before. So if you’re reading this, I’m sorry for upsetting you but I’m shocked! Sorry

Everyone's focusing on Maybe but what's their last name? That is where the real issue could be!

I love an unusual name, I really like Maeby. My kids don’t have unusual names right enough but there’s really not many that would make me think - eh?!

Ridiculous name

YANBU, I would have said something too

Surname is Knott

@TheYearOfSmallThings

I have a big mouth and when a friend said she was considering Leanne as a name, I said "God, no! That's a really rough name!".

Luckily she didn't fall out with me (or use that name in the end). She did put a flat veto on "Michael" when I was considering it for DS, which I accepted.

That’s completely different as Leanne is a perfectly fine name (if a bit dated to the 80s!) and it’s your classist opinion that it is horrible. Whereas Maybe is a word that could lead to ridicule if used as a name.

I actually think, if you can set the meaning and use of the word aside, it is pretty. Unfortunately, it is such a commonly used word that it’s impossible to set aside those things. Shame.

I think Mabel is very pretty. I have also heard of Somerby being used as girls name, which is cute too.

Maybe is bad enough to meet the threshold for intervention imo. However, having made your feelings clear once I don’t think you need to keep mentioning that you hate it unless she asks. For the sake of the poor child though I hope she reconsiders!

Actually, reading through this thread it seems to me that the British are rather conservative when it comes to names.

There was an episode of ROHOG on the other day and, in the Distinctly Average round, the question was 'how many different names were registered for babies born in the UK' for one particular year. It was something like 70,000! Even if you count the different spellings of Mohammed, May/Mae/Mai, Eve/Evie etc. as separate, that's still flabbergasting.

I agree that, if it weren't a homophone for a common word, standing on it's own, Mabey (possibly short for Mabel) sounds perfectly nice. Then again, any girl called Iona - also a lovely name - could be ripe for teasing, especially if her surname (maiden or married) is a noun.

Maebe Knott

Maebe Wright

I'd worry more about teenage boys rating the girls as to how likely they are to sleep with them: "those all say no, so no chance there but that one's a Maybe har har har."

But hopefully teenage boys will be less vile 15 years from now (eternal optimist).

I read an article where the woman’s son was called “whistle”. I honestly don’t know how someone’s thought processes conclude that names like that are perfect for their child!

Your friend is entitled to use whatever name she wants, but you are also allowed your own opinion on it. I think there are nice ways to say it’s not something you would have chosen but it’s up to her. It’s not your responsibility to talk her out of it.

She's obviously concerned you won't like it.

If she's asking what you think, I might guide her towards it being two names, so May Bea [surname], perhaps point out that most Beatrice's are know as Bea/Bee to friends.

Otherwise, say nothing. Little Maybe will have options to drop the Be bit when older.

@TerribleCustomerCervix

I’d be tempted to tell her that I’m sorry about how I reacted, but honestly it’s her baby and she doesn’t need me or anyone else to “come round” the name!

If she needs her friends’ validation so much maybe an unusual name isn’t the right one for her.

This is a really good response

[quote PattyPan]@SevenAndMe I would be more concerned about it holding them back in adulthood - not quite the same but a friend of mine changed her surname when she became qualified in her profession because she didn’t think she would be taken seriously and it wasn’t even as bad as Maybe.[/quote]
Yes, I think this is more the issue.

Kids are generally accepting of unusual names, but imagine the sheer annoyance of going through adult life with a name like Maeby. Having to explain it to everyone you met for the first time, every time you called a call centre or tried to arrange a doctors appointment.

I took on DH’s unusual surname as part of a double barrel- I’ve experienced how annoying it is to be constantly explaining and correcting people, apologising for its complicated spelling and explaining how to pronounce it. Five years in, I’ve pretty much dropped it because it was such a pain in the arse, and at least I had that choice!

I quite like Maeby with mae for short

I was in a playground the other day and a mum was yelling to her child who was called Maverick, I cringed every time she said it.

Persephone. I know a child called Persephone. Makes me cringe.

Maybell is nicer. Not pronounced like Mabel.

@IsAnybodyListening

Persephone. I know a child called Persephone. Makes me cringe.

Why? Persephone is a perfectly normal name. Unlike Maeby / Maybe.

Yep, I have met a couple of Persephone's - normal (albeit posh) name, right? Wasn't she a Greek goddess? (I think she's also known as Cora, but I'm not up on my Greek mythology so I might have this very wrong!)

Maybe isn't a name like that though.

It’s a really bloody stupid name and your friend is setting her up for a lifetime of bullying and teasing. Hope she gives her a decent middle name use.

There was a woman at the park today with children called Thursday, Poem and flower.

I'd assume flower was just a nickname TBH. Thursday and Poem I don't mind.

To go back to the OPs original question I'd only comment if I thought the name was offensive in some way.

You'd assume Flower was a nickname, but Thursday and Poem were actual, normal names?
Ok.