The Yorkshire shepherdess and the snowflake generation

[Marcia1989]

www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-9438725/Our-Yorkshire-Farm-star-Amanda-Owen-gave-birth-eighth-child-husband-ASLEEP-upstairs.html

Sorry for link to the Daily Mail. It was the only non-paywalled article but her comments are also reported in The Times and The Telegraph.

She runs a sheep farm in a remote part of Yorkshire and has 9 kids. She thinks that parents do not raise their children to be sufficiently independent, to look after themselves. She didn't really do home-schooling with them because she doesn't want to be a helicopter parent - she expects them to just get on with it. She expects all the kids to help on the farm and they don't really do devices/TV etc. Having watched her TV series, I agree that her kids seem admirably self-sufficient and mature and I do think generally it's really good for children to have some responsibility. But, I do also wonder whether a lack of individual attention is detrimental to them. And there will be some kids who don't get on with it, and is it really right to just leave them to it?

What does everyone think?

I have only ever come across her on that Ben Fogle programme but I thought she seemed very down to earth and likeable. She seemed very laid back parenting wise but I don't think that that is always a bad thing. She did mention that she had to diversify their income through social media, books etc but I can't knock her for doing what she has to do to care for her family. They all seemed very happy and that's what counts at the end of it all.

She doing the walk as much as the talk though. More than many.
You genuinely have to be nails on a farm.
This time last year most of us were in a panic about having no loo roll. That’s how ridiculous our version of life has become.

I'm neither insecure nor paranoid. I'm sure there are entitled dc about but to suggest there's a generation if them is goady and untrue.

Not on the evidence of your posts. You think she's being 'judgemental' and 'goady' when she's not. That's paranoia. And you're taking it all far too personally.

It’s tv. I take everything I view on tv as, made for tv.

She lets her kids ride horses without hats, I don’t need know anything more about her than that
Fuck all to do to with snowflakes, and more about not wanting your dc to end up on life support. Seen it too often, totally unacceptable since the 1970s

Agreed! I’m one of five and so is dh. We have two, as do two of my siblings and two have none.

Sorry, the last comment was in reply to whoever said most children from big families choose to have one or two!

I think the judgemental and goady are here on this thread.

@mermaidsariel

I think the judgemental and goady are here on this thread.

Yep. I think you're right.

Sad to see so much jalouy and bitching on this thread.

Amanda comes across as strong and independant and is bringing up strong individuals.

They do not give out jobs to the kids in a sexist way....Sid helps out with the cream teas and the eldest lad is a whizz with machinery and working somewhere nearby.

Her kids are fine, unlike a lot of inner city kids confined to a flat and living an a crime filled area.

Amanda is not saying she is right and everyone else is wrong she just comes across as happy to be doing what she loves.
What about all the smug women on TV with their fake faces and endless boasting about how wealthy they are? Boring!

I have enjoyed the books and now the TV. I hope her kids continue to thrive and I wish them all well.

I think she is entitled to her opinions the same as we all are! She's obviously done a great job bringing up her children and her achievements and attitude are admirable.

The impression I get from watching the TV show is that it's heavily edited, and there's a certain amount of staging for the cameras- including the way she dresses. Does anyone really think she puts makeup on and a mini skirt at 5am to feed the sheep when the cameras aren't there? Also, the apparent lack of supervision of the children is not real. As if they let a pre-school child out by themselves to play on a farm!!!It's not real! I also imagine that she has some childcare for the youngest children- there's no way she can complete all the labour on the farm with a toddler in tow- either that or she actually has farm employees to tend to the firm while she looks after her children! I really don't think we see the whole story on the show!

@Geamhradh

In fairness, I think people would warm to her if she wasn't quite so "I'm right and everyone else is wrong/snowflakes/my parenting is right and yours is wrong"

I find the idea of shepherdessing in rural Yorkshire fascinating. And I'd love to see and hear more about it. But no, I'm not interested in hearing a woman diss other people's choices and ways of parenting just because they're different to hers.

Reading the first paragraph, she sounds to be ideal for MN! I wonder which username is her's, is there a sheepwoman or the like?

I do also think she gets a lot of media attention because a lot of men hold her up as some kind of perfect woman - looking sexy while nursing a baby and simultaneously fixing a tractor... not something most of us could pull off.

Anyone who thinks they’re raising their children the right way must have such confidence. Well done to her. Let’s hope it doesn’t ever backfire.

@Veterinari

Allowing the landscape to naturally fix itself would in the short/medium term make it completely no productive and a huge fire risk.

That's interesting @Dobbyafreeelf

In what way would the fire risk increase? Wouldn't increased woodland/shade/dampness help?

I feel like rarely a summer goes by without an uncontrolled moorland blaze, and when the peat catches it burns long and hard

Agree that reforestation is unfeasible but I do a bit of an eye roll when folk mention conservation and uplands. Yes of course there are important SSI but there's an awful lot of barren land too

You would think so but sadly that's often not how it works in the short term. I'm no expert on it but from what I can understand the intermediate species that spring up tend to be things like gorse, bracken and heather which although they grow well in wet conditions they are actually incredibly dry plants. So are effectively a tinder box on top of the ground. These species are very rapid growers too so they quickly outcompete slower growing plants such as trees saplings.

It takes a very long time for grassland to get to a point where it is woodland again. Probably talking 50 years plus in reality. Probably longer in upland areas where wind and weather will really test young trees. What happens is it goes to shrub and would (assuming it doesn't burn ect) eventually turns to woodland gradually. The only way to bypass this would be to plant young bare root trees and thin as needed. But that would be a huge investment in both time and money.

@FreekStar

I think she is entitled to her opinions the same as we all are! She's obviously done a great job bringing up her children and her achievements and attitude are admirable.

The impression I get from watching the TV show is that it's heavily edited, and there's a certain amount of staging for the cameras- including the way she dresses. Does anyone really think she puts makeup on and a mini skirt at 5am to feed the sheep when the cameras aren't there? Also, the apparent lack of supervision of the children is not real. As if they let a pre-school child out by themselves to play on a farm!!!It's not real! I also imagine that she has some childcare for the youngest children- there's no way she can complete all the labour on the farm with a toddler in tow- either that or she actually has farm employees to tend to the firm while she looks after her children! I really don't think we see the whole story on the show!

Much of what you are claiming incredulity about is actually quite normal on farms. I think that's the point she is trying to make...

Many many many pre-school age farm children tag along while their parents and grandparents 'tend' to the farm. They put them in backpacks, wheelbarrows, all terrain pushchairs, ATV cabs etc and everyone just has to get on with it.

I know plenty of farm children who from the age of 2.5 ish are often outside 'on their own' with slightly older siblings/ cousins under the general watch of various adults. They learn from a very early age where the boundaries were, which gates they weren't allowed to go through, and the drill if they heard a tractor coming. Sadly there's still far too many accidents involving children on farms but there's also huge numbers of children that live wonderful free lives. It's about balancing the risk.

There's any amount of videos out there of 3 year olds happily lambing sheep, outside of farming lots of parents won't even expect their 3 year olds to get dressed by themselves these days.

For what it's worth no matter what the time of day I always try and look semi presentable. Like Amanda we farm in a very touristy area and you never know who you might run into.

I wouldn't personally want what she does for my children; I have reservations about the way she and her husband parent their children (but it's interesting how it seems, from this thread, as if 'parenting' is mostly the mother's job?). But I also think she's not wrong in demonstrating that children can be very responsible if you let them.

Upthread someone said As if they let a pre-school child out by themselves to play on a farm!!!It's not real!

Erm ... yes, actually, of course people do. Why do you think people don't? A pre-school child is quite old enough to know where they can and can't go and I've never come across a working family farm where children wouldn't be taught where to play. This is kind of the point.

How about some of her parenting ideas seem admirable and some of them maybe less so? That's pretty normal isn't it?

I think the judgemental and goady are here on this thread.
If judging people who let their kids ride without protective headwear makes me judgemental and goady then please put me first in line for an award.
I have seen first hand, all too often the results of a fall without protective headwear and it ain’t pretty and it is lifelong. An analogy for non riders might be parents choosing to put their kids totally unrestrained in a car. I would put it right up at the top of a massive safeguarding issue, especially in their location with lots of stony tracks.

@Corncorncorn

I feel very sorry for the oldest girl. She's stuck looking after kids she didn't choose to have.

Same as the Radfords really.

@Corncorncorn She's at university not at home looking after her siblings.

All the jealous people on here are very funny!

I love Amanda, and I say that as someone who lives deep in crime riddled London, and I actually think she doesn’t come over as judgemental in the tv show (haven’t read this article). I think her kids seem really capable (the ones we see the most of on the show certainly) and the freedom looks lovely. Do I want that life? No! Do I love watching it? Yes! And it confirmed some things I do with my children, like expecting them to get on and help me and each other. I’m interested in the bedroom arrangements, I can never see how they all fit in upstairs.
They are nothing like the Radcliffes.

I struggle to respect anyone who has 9 children these days in the UK. I have a worry about over-population. Just because you can have loads of kids doesn't mean you ought to, especially if they are used to prop up or create some 'lifestyle' profile in the media.

AO has created followers and a media presence and I give her credit for her business brain, because she's making money from books, talks, and the TV. It helps that's she's 6ft 2" and pretty. But without all the kids and if she wasn't blonde and pretty, no one would know about her.

It's not that many years since the Dales were full of large families like hers, farming small tenancies. All that's changed is the media has latched onto the number of kids she has and made her into a minor celebrity.

And you can't compare their life with most other people who live in towns and cities. So I think she ought to stop pontificating on parenting because she's not set a good example by having that many children anyway, and she doesn't have a clue how other families live, compared to her.

'Absolutely nobody should be having nine kids.'

They seem to look after each other whilst Amanda is busy being interviewed, promoting latest releases, filming etc.

I could unkindly suggest her dc need more interest shown in them rather than being treated like farm staff but they all seem happy and healthy so it obviously works for them. Live and let live Amanda! Respect everyone's child rearing efforts 🙄.

I’m sure she does have a clue. She came from a three bed semi in Huddersfield herself . She’s also active in the community. I agree with her views that many children these days are molly coddled and spoon fed. I don’t think she’s lecturing or feeling smug. She’s just a forthright Yorkshire woman speaking her mind.
Her choice to have so many children is at odds with society today, but she is a brilliant mother. She’s not making money from her kids exactly, she’s finding ways to support her family and give them the best chances in life. Good for her.
Why says that Raven resents helping her younger siblings when she’s home from Uni during lockdown? There are many assumptions here. I would have loved to have been brought up like that. I wish my children had had that sort of upbringing too.