Overwhelmed by messy house - any tips?

[whatdoidoallday]

Please be kind

My house is a total mess - stuff everywhere, dust everywhere no organisation to it. Where do I start with it? I'm totally overwhelmed.

I have no excuse as I have two school aged children and don't work. The house has always been on the untidy side. But having everyone at home and homeschooling two children one with SEN (and emotionally very demanding) has taken it's toll and the house looks like bomb's hit it. Now the children are back at school I really need to sort it out but when I walk into a room I'm totally overwhelmed and don't know where to start. I keep drinking cups of tea and procrastinating! Any tips on how to get on top of it or has anyone been in this situation and dug themselves out of it?

Do you like podcasts or have playlists? I find if I'm listening to a podcast it's less of a chore. Agree with those who say do a cupboard at a time. If I do a whole room I end up not having enough time and have piles of stuff leftover. Our tip is really good and has recycling points for books and some small furniture which is useful when the charity shops aren't open. And don't beat yourself up, I can't imagine how hard it's been over the last few months.

For me, its not the clearing out, tidying and cleaning thats the problem, its actually disposing of the stuff you've cleared out thats the problem 😳

I'm quite ruthless and can fill bags of stuff that can go, but then I cant seem to deal with having to sort that into stuff for charity shop, stuff for tip, etc. much less load it into the car and drive around numerous places trying to find a charity shop that will take it!

I’m in the same situation OP and so was my neighbour until she decided to do a proper “audit”. She labelled every drawer and cupboard with a number, made a corresponding list, and gave herself a strict time limit on each one - a bag for charity stuff, a few bits listed on eBay, everything else put back with a couple of “don’t know what the fuck to do with this” items put in a storage box.

She reckons by the end of it about a third of her drawers/cupboards were empty, which allowed them to be repurposed for other things. She made a few quid on eBay, gave loads away or binned it, and her house looks loads better!

She told me this about 18 months ago, but I too just keep shutting the cupboards and making cups of tea.

Dance music! Ten mins per room!

Then tackle the remaining as 'projects', break it down into steps.

Just to add to what others have said - make sure everything has a place. If you know where stuff goes once it’s all done it’s so much easier to keep on top of. Even the days when there’s things out everywhere if you know where each item is meant to go it’s so much quicker to tidy up. It’s the things without homes that soon make a house untidy and cluttered.
I once heard if you haven’t got time to be tidy there you certainly don’t have time to be untidy - and actually that makes a lot of sense.

Can I suggest that you don't bother to sell stuff unless it is actually worth it? My experience is that brands like boden will sell on eBay but high street/primark stuff isn't worth it.

I helped a friend declutter in the summer and we bundled up kids clothes and sold them via a local mums WhatsApp for a couple of quid then the rest went to the clothing bank at the tip. She had a Tripp trapp high chair and that went for good money on eBay,

I see so many people keeping stuff to sell and it's a waste of time and energy. You have already spent the money so get it gone and have the headspace instead.

As a few people have said upthread breaking it down into categories is the best way to tackle the overwhelm.

I often feel overwhelmed by housework, so I try and break it down into more manageable chunks.
I always start with clearing out storage areas first - drawers/cupboards etc - so as you're clearing through other stuff you've got somewhere to put the stuff you want to keep! We have loads of storage in our house - all bedrooms have built in double wardrobes, which up until recently were full of junk. I slowly cleared through so now when I tackle other bits I have somewhere to store the decent stuff

Hire a skip or Hippo bag, if finances allow. I did this a few years ago and got rid of loads of clutter. It’s easier because you don’t have to factor in trips to the tip and when you can find time to go - you just bag the stuff up and chuck it into the skip.

Do one room thoroughly first. Start with a single drawer and a 15 minute timer. Have your mug of tea as you go.

Write out a timetable and split your rooms evenly across the days, taking into account days you might be more busy, so make those the 'easier' rooms. Then each morning when you get back from the school run get stuck into doing those rooms - tidy away stuff, clean and really get it looking good. Don't get bogged down by other rooms needing attention (apart from obvious things that are more daily tasks like cleaning kitchen worktops, washing, toilets and sinks etc). I find it really helpful because instead of a whole house demanding attention on any one day, it's a manageable couple of rooms.
Some things that are really helpful to me too are:
Everything has a home/good storage
Everything kept is either loved or used and no unnecessary duplicates
As much as possible is kept away in cupboards etc and no Knick knacks unless they're in a display cabinet or something.
No item of clothing is kept out unless in laundry room
Keep like with like

Oh and keep your phone in your pocket or Fitbit on so you can count your steps as you go!

My house was a massive mess when I threw my xh out.
Love it! Tidier already!

Yes. That was one of the biggest perks of getting rid of him.

Some charities, I believe, are still collecting stuff if you prebook a collection (a deadline could also be a good motivator). I saw this one recommended and saved the link, but not tried myself yet: www.icollectclothes.co.uk/donation-info

And all of his bloody millions of stuff.

We've got 3 DC, and to be honest, I found myself completely overwhelmed by the amount of stuff in the house and moving it all to keep things clean. We then had to clear FIL's bungalow after he died which was back breaking, and both DH and I said "we've got far too much stuff in our house that we don't need".

So we went through the whole house - one room at a time, so it wasn't overwhelming. We were really brutal - we had box after box of ornaments, knick knacks and things we'd been given or gifted - and I'd say around 80% of it went to the tip or charity shop, and we packed some bits we felt too guilty to get rid of into storage boxes that are in the rafters above the garage.

It was really liberating, tbh.

Buy decent, strong bin bags with strings, maybe even the garden ones. And aim to fill one a day. Nothing put me off sorting faster than fighting with cheap flimsy bin bags that ripped when I put too much in them.

Yes. That was one of the biggest perks of getting rid of him.

How are you getting on op?

I’m interested too, in how op is doing. Op I did it this way: I did my cleaning cupboard first (the size of a wardrobe) as I loved having my precious beloved cleaning cupboard when I used to keep the apartment lovely (before I got slammed with severe depression). It helped motivate me as it wasn’t a massive job but wasn’t small either- just the perfect amount to get into the groove of cleaning, but not overwhelming, and give me something I previously had loved dearly, back.

Then I cleaned and did my kitchen (top to bottom literally; as I was given advice by a pp on my own thread- start from the top. So the high cupboard, I cleaned it out and decluttered and cleaned and put stuff back in an organised way, then started left to right- if you look at my pics I did the microwave through to the sink at the end. Then the bottom cupboards then floor). I found that doing the kitchen first helped me get excited again for cooking, and routine of keeping on top of cleaning in there which helped me keep motivated to do the rest of the rooms.

Then the lounge to create a tidy rest area. Then bedroom last (by that time I was really massively struggling but forced myself to push through- with the help of my lovely fiancé otherwise I would never have coped by that point!)

I still have to do the small two rooms that are the shower room and the toilet room, and I still need to finish decorating (doors and window frames and some repairs too). So I’m by no means finished but the rooms we spend most time in are, at least, decluttered, clean, and very much usable now. Which helps my quality of life, my motivation to cook and keep on top of it all, and get (and keep!) a routine. So I’m taking a “big cleaning” break for now and when I have the energy (hopefully next week) I will do the last two rooms and the repairs and decorating.

I’ll post my kitchen pics (please don’t judge they were gross! Lovely now though- aside from the painting I need to do on the window frames and door!)

I’m cheering you on op you got this!

My kitchen after

Some more after of my kitchen..

And it’s all stayed that way ever since because I worked too hard to let anything slip.. Including my lounge and bedroom!

Sending you motivation

Thanks for all the responses .

I made a start on the living room. Only did a few hours as I had to collect the children from school. But it does look better already. Hope to get it finished off early next week.

Some great advice on the thread.

You can do it OP. Just do start to clear in small chunks, make sure you have plenty of black bags, start with one drawer would be my advice.

We have recently moved from a very large 5 bed house to a 3 bed bungalow, we had so much stuff. I was ruthless with getting rid of stuff. The best thing ever. I got really into clearing and it made our move much, much easier.

Make a start OP.