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Original poster

My friend reckons your allure goes once you are in your 40s

87 replies

orientalknife · 10/02/2021 17:47

I was pissed off with this sweeping assumption and wondered if she was projecting her own insecurity

Of course youth has a certain prettiness and appeal but I think older women can be very beautiful and attractive

OP posts:
GreenLeafTurnip · 10/02/2021 18:26

God this is depressing. I bet should doesn't think the same about men does she?

AprilThe8th · 10/02/2021 18:29

Nah I'm nearly 41 and I've still got it

SandysMam · 10/02/2021 18:34

I think 40 is the age where you can’t pretend to be a girl anymore and being silly and flirty looks a bit sad! But you can still be sexy for sure, just in a more mature way!

Milkshake7489 · 10/02/2021 18:34

My allure is taking a little break on account of my new baby Grin

But sleepless nights will be a thing of the past by the time I'm 40 and I'm pretty sure it will be back!

Seriously though, I know so many women who look fantastic in their 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond. (My mum has never looked better at 55 and my ultimate style icon is an old boss who must have been close to 60.)

Ignore your friend, she doesn't know what she's talking about.

sonjadog · 10/02/2021 18:36

I'm not sure I ever had much allure to start off with...

murbblurb · 10/02/2021 18:37

Silly cow alert. Does she only rate herself by her apparent shagability?

Littlefluffyclouds13 · 10/02/2021 18:40

What outdated rubbish!!!

I remarried in my mid 40s and looked waaaaay hotter/better than when I married in my 20s!
I take really good care of myself, love clothes (and couldn't give two hoots about ridiculous rules like no mini skirts etc) and look bloody great.
Definitely still plenty of allure here and I'm 50 next month!

IrishGirl2020 · 10/02/2021 18:41

🤣 Reminds me of that Amy Schumer sketch ‘Last Fuckable Day’ (on youtube)

OhioOhioOhio · 10/02/2021 18:41

As if things are not hard enough I'm now supposed to have allure. Ffs.

Littlefluffyclouds13 · 10/02/2021 18:42

And as for 'allure' the only man I want to be attractive to is my dh. And believe me it's written all over face every single day Grin
He's mid 30s, so that kind of shits on your friends theory too!

Afonavon · 10/02/2021 18:44

@CoronaIsWatching

I think a lot of the problem comes when some women decide to cut all their hair off as soon as they hit 40 like Susan Kennedy did in Neighbours. Long locks soften the face and add to the allure
I love this reference! I am 46, I’ m guessing you are around my age.
Tiredmumno1 · 10/02/2021 18:45

@Bangable

I love that the first response referenced Miranda, as I read it I was doing it in the voice of Stevie Grin

Onlineshopperforever · 10/02/2021 18:50

If losing my allure means I'm left alone by the office sex pest, then I will quite happily crack on with discarding it.

What I think your friend was probably trying to say is that by 40, most women have actually realised that their importance and role in life is not actually defined by how attractive they are to the opposite sex. So they stop behaving in the ways that they think they need to in order to be attractive to men because they don't actually need to be attractive to men to be a person worthy of existence. To people who don't know better it's called giving up. To me, it's called freedom.

ReggieKrait · 10/02/2021 18:50

Never had any! I can’t miss what I’ve never known.

snowydaysandholidays · 10/02/2021 18:52

Losing my allure was quite possibly the best thing that could have happened to me Grin now I can crack on with being my true self and not giving a rats arse what others think. Liberation is far more exciting trust me!

Faith50 · 10/02/2021 18:52

Nope - mid 40's and I still have allure. I still turn heads, sometimes with men who are years younger.

The poster that mentioned Susan from Neighbours cutting her hair at 40 - golly was she only 40 then?! The cut was far too severe and red if I remember correctly.

snowydaysandholidays · 10/02/2021 18:54

Dh's paunch still has allure

Biscoffaddict · 10/02/2021 18:55

@RandomDent

I don’t think I ever had any.
Me neither! You can’t miss what you’ve never had.
MessAllOver · 10/02/2021 18:56

My DS came home crying noisily through the front door and my allure left quietly out the back door. Never seen it since.

Bearnecessity · 10/02/2021 19:02

My allure departed for most of the last decade and seems to have reappeared recently, I have no idea why...was invisible...for a while there and now I am getting all kinds of courtesies, gallantry, offers of help, frisson moments...even my ds18 has noticed and asked what is going on.

Stompythedinosaur · 10/02/2021 19:04

Just as well that 0% of a woman's value is based on being attractive to men, then.

Strangely I don't see any 40 year old men worrying about their allure!

Sittingonabench · 10/02/2021 19:06

My allure moved out when my husband moved in... we maintained a casual relationship until lockdown... I can only assume it’s having the time of its life in a bar/restaurant/theatre somewhere while I’m stuck inside watching tv and eating leftovers because despite doing nothing all day I’m inexplicably exhausted Hmm

GCAcademic · 10/02/2021 19:09

Not sure I ever had much allure, but I am more confident and happier in my own skin now I’m in my 40s, and no longer give a crap what people think of me. As someone said above, that’s freedom.

YouokHun · 10/02/2021 19:15

Come back @orientalknife and tell us how your friend defines it and how old she is!

PickAChew · 10/02/2021 19:19

Most 40+ men aren't all that alluring, tbh.