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Original poster

Would you read a diary if you found it?

77 replies

PandoraIadoreya · 08/02/2021 06:04

I've kept a diary for a few years now and just awake thinking that I should probably hide it now my teens are aware of it. It made me wonder whether people would read a diary if they found one? I'd like to say I wouldn't but, given the opportunity to really know how someone thinks, I'm not sure whether I would be able to resist in real life. Ditto for email /social media hacking, if I had the skills (presumably it's more complicated than just clever guessing of passwords) then I would be tempted.
Has anyone ever done this? Were there consequences? (And tips on hiding my diary too!)

OP posts:
Sunflowergirl1 · 08/02/2021 06:08

I think it is always tempting but having read many in a professional capacity I would say beware what you would wish for. If it is a family member you will probably read things you wound like and then it is impossible to put it back in the bottle !

I have seen everything from what they thought of people to extremely intimate details of their sex life which doesn't make easy reading

Aquamarine1029 · 08/02/2021 06:13

I would not read someone's diary, with the only exception if it were my child's and I sincerely believed they were in serious peril. This never happened, they are adults now and never kept dairies that I know of. I simply could not invade someone's privacy just because I was nosy.

Paranoidandroidmarvin1350 · 08/02/2021 06:14

No. My parents read mine during a hard period in my life. They then used it against me. Never read someone’s inner thoughts.

HurricaneBitch · 08/02/2021 06:29

No I wouldn't, I think it's a pretty low thing to do.

vampirethriller · 08/02/2021 06:36

No. My mother found mine when I was a teen and read it, then repeated bits to her friends and my aunt. I would never read anything private.

Fifipop185 · 08/02/2021 06:40

No way. My teen DD has one that she writes in when she feel anxious. I innocently found it in her room while helping her to search for a lost earring, and wouldn't dream of reading it. It would be a massive breach of trust and her privacy and I'm not sure I'd want to know her inner thoughts about some parts of her life.

Hoiking · 08/02/2021 06:48

If it were a total strangers, then yes. Someone I knew, never.

TabbyStar · 08/02/2021 06:51

No. DD has one that she leaves out but I don't read it. My DM read mine, and two XPs. It's horrible. Even though the last one was about 16 years ago it still worries me about what I write. I do "hide" mine in that it would probably be easy enough to find, but it's not laying about to tempt anyone.

BigPaperBag · 08/02/2021 07:13

No. My husband kept a gratitude journal for about 6 months after he had counselling and even though he told me it was fine to look it still felt to personal so I didn’t.

Peanutbutterblood · 08/02/2021 07:19

No I wouldn't my mum read mine. Shes never admitted it but I know she did by comments made at the time and honestly it changed our relationship

My boyfriend also read it which annoyed me to

Cowgran · 08/02/2021 07:19

Part of me wants to say yes I would read it as I think that's the most honest answer. And yet I know what it feels like to have mine read. And I also read the diary of someone I was keen on many years ago and reading what he wrote about me was pretty upsetting. I remember my mum saying to me at the time, that if you read someone's private thoughts, you have to be prepared not to like what you read.

But if I was you, I would probably hide it.

Original poster
PandoraIadoreya · 08/02/2021 07:40

@Sunflowergirl1 what job is that? Law enforcement? Are diaries used by police against people? That's awful!
I know morally that invading privacy is a bad thing (obviously) but I've always wanted to closely understand someone. Just one person! That's why I would be tempted. Yes maybe a strangers diary would be 'easier'. I sometimes wonder about posthumous publishing of diaries (Anne Frank, Ann Lister).

OP posts:
Popsy321 · 08/02/2021 07:44

No. I couldn't give a shit about the ramblings of someone else's life 😁

picklemewalnuts · 08/02/2021 08:09

Asking us whether we would isn't really going to help you understand what your teens would do.

Your teens would read it, I'm sure, then at the first sign of something intimate say 'ew' and hide it in disgust. You'd have to hope they didn't come across anything earth shattering before that.

They won't be looking in your sock drawer or under your mattress. Unless they borrow your socks?

pistachioglace · 08/02/2021 08:10

@Paranoidandroidmarvin1350

No. My parents read mine during a hard period in my life. They then used it against me. Never read someone’s inner thoughts.
This. I threw away my childhood and teenage diaries because of this, I really wish I'd kept them.
Lutwey · 08/02/2021 08:16

10 year old me, found my best friends diary when we were on a school holiday together and wrote I like butt's in it. But adult me wouldn't read or write in it! It's private and basically would feel like eaves dropping on someone's therapy.

DaisyDreaming · 08/02/2021 08:20

It would depend on the type and whose it is. I read a bit of my nans as I didn’t realise what I had found at first and she was moaning about my grandpa and I decided I didn’t want to see any more. On the other hand I didn’t know my great nan and used to enjoy reading hers which was mostly about her travels

TreacleHart · 08/02/2021 08:25

My mum died a few years ago, and she used to write diaries . I have 6 or so .
I never looked at them as was still feeling fragile about her passing , but a few years ago I was thinking about past days out / family occasions so looked at those dates. In them she had wrote about her day , by writing things like ' and treacle can you remember ...and ' Treacle if you are reading this, it was the best day ever '
It was like she was writing them with me in mind for when I read them.
I still can't really read them , but I will never part with them .

Ithinkhedidit · 08/02/2021 08:26

Oh I thought you meant if you randomly found one like in a park or in the back of a cupboard of a house you'd just moved into. I'd quite possibly peruse a stranger's diary with mild interest but I certainly wouldn't read one that belonged to someone I know.

Summersummer22 · 08/02/2021 08:28

I wouldn’t. It depends though how much of a nosy person you are I know of a couple of people that I think would definitely read my diary IF I had one. Can you lock it away in a safe and hide the safe?

Bunchup · 08/02/2021 08:37

Another one whose mother snooped at her teenage diary.

Pity really, as it was full of typical 14 year old entries like 'my mother is such a fucking BITCH!!!!!!!'

I rather think she wish she'd kept her snout out.

ClashCityRocker · 08/02/2021 08:46

Oh god I'd never do it now - but did find and read my dad's diary as an early teen.

I really wish I hadn't - at the time the marriage was breaking down and he kept getting caught watching porn (this was in the days where you had the big Internet extension cable that plugged into the phone line...). I mean, there weren't sexually explicit details, but all the emotional ones. It felt so wrong and changed the way I related to both my parents at that time. So I'd really never do it again.

Summersummer22 · 08/02/2021 08:57

@Bunchup

Another one whose mother snooped at her teenage diary.

Pity really, as it was full of typical 14 year old entries like 'my mother is such a fucking BITCH!!!!!!!'

I rather think she wish she'd kept her snout out.

I bet she did 😂
Embroideredstars · 08/02/2021 08:58

@vampirethriller

No. My mother found mine when I was a teen and read it, then repeated bits to her friends and my aunt. I would never read anything private.
Me too! That put paid to my ever writing another one SadAngry

I dont know what possessed her to confront me about it either, reading it was one thing if something worried her (was probably 12/13) talking about it quite another!

Actually thinking about it now I'm 45 and having a bad day, that's really awful. My ds is nearly the same age. I dont remember what I wrote but I know she shouted at me told me I was awful and how her best friend agreed with her! I feel angry and upset all over again! Such a breach of privacy, if she was worried and upset about it she could have broached it so differently... she shouldn't have made me feel guilty for my inner thoughts, it's no wonder I've struggled for years with worrying what people think of me and whether I'm being a "good" person Sad

tootsytoo · 08/02/2021 08:58

No never. It's rude