Self Medicating With Food...Diabetes, Support?

[73kittycat73]

Hi, I've tried to word/start writing this a few times, so I hope it comes out OK...But, today I have finally realized that I eat junk/sweet food to self medicate.
I have type 2 diabetes and have been 'getting away' with it for a while, but I'm starting to feel the effects of eating sweet food. If I eat chocolate before bed for example, I get terrible cramps in (Mainly my left) calf. Recently I have cut down on chocolate as it was making me feel like crap after eating it. I take depression and anxiety tablets and they make me tired so I thought it was them. However I have really noticed recently that eating it makes me so wiped out afterwards.
Today I was bored so ate a bit of cheesecake. Boy did I feel like shit afterwards. I was still feeling a bit rubbish a few hours later so I decided to dig out the old blood sugar testing kit. My blood sugars were17. In the dangerous category. (A non diabetic person should be between 7.1 to 10.0). It has given me a shake, and a wake up call.
I went to my Sainsburys delivery (Due Sunday.) and have taken all the sweet things out, including Pepsi Max. I drink 2ltrs of the stuff a day (I get 'cotton wool' mouth from the medications I take for depression/anxiety and just water does nothing.). I have read conflicting articles on whether Pepsi Max spikes your insulin so have taken them out my list too. I tried finding a decent drink that wasn't full of sugar or artificial sweeteners, I couldn't find any! So I have ordered some fizzy water and orange squash (With sweeteners.) to have it very diluted for some flavour.
However, like I said, it's only just clicked that I self medicate with food (Sweet stuff being the most.). I know I'll be back to craving even later tonight, or definitely tomorrow, so I was wondering if anybody would like to join me on cutting down on junk food. We could come on when we are craving, or just for some support generally. If you're doing it to loose weight that's fine too.
I hope I haven't gone on...I just wanted to be honest (With myself too.) and start a new, healthier, way of eating.

Just had a light bulb moment. I was in 'all or nothing' thinking. I could accept that life/losing weight isn't linier and there will be times when I over eat. Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and try again.

Just realised that basically what you said to me in your posts. Sorry about that. Not long woken up! Hope you are all having a great day?

@73kittycat73 - take each day as it comes, really. You're completely right this isn't linear - my weight has been static for weeks. But I've also not been as straight about my intake as I should be. I can be honest with myself and own my disappointment. We're on a journey here as we learn to take responsibility for ourselves and make big lifestyle changes that some other people don't have to make. It can feel unfair, but its also our reality. A piece of cake isn't going to hurt!

@BorderlineHappy it's odd isn't it. I had this last year, it's liberating when you want it to happen as it frees you from feeling obligated and gives you freedom to look at what's next. I am 100% happier in my new job. If you don't want to happen, it can feel like it owns you for a bit, so watch out for colleagues who may not be in the same space as you!

Thank you for your kind words travailtotravel. Very wise.

@73kittycat73 Enjoy your mums birthday,then get back on the saddle once its all over.

I made some more cauliflower rice and this time i added the fried onion.
Oh it was so nice.

I dont mind eating the salad most days but it was nice to eat a "normal" dinner.

Steak,cauliflower mash and broccoli.
Im sitting having my coffee now.

@travailtotravel - I think you meant the work thing for me. Thank you. There’s one of us going which will probably be me. I’m off work but have spoken with the others. This isn’t the first time we’ve been here sadly. At the moment I’m just overwhelmed by all the buried feelings about everything I’ve been subjected to over the past few years.

I love cauliflower mash. I'm not being great this month. We went away for the night last weekend, are away for the night tomorrow, it's my birthday next week and dds so her party Saturday and then in a few weeks we're going to a vineyard in the evening for food, drinks and music. Ah well every little helps, we don't need to be perfect all the time.

Ooh apols to @BorderlineHappy, I did mean @PaperMonster!

It takes a while to recover from and unfetter yourself from all of it so do take time!

Thanks BorderlineHappy. That fried onion and cauli rice sounds delish! I order some salad for next week to try with the new Linda McCartney Chicken Style Pieces I found on Asda. Never had them before. I hope they are in stock. I usually like Linda McCartneys food so looking foward to trying them. Enjoy your coffee!
Sorry to hear you feel bad PaperMonster. Is it posable to seek legal advice on how you've been treated? I hope there is a good outcome for you. (((hugs)))
Looks like you and me are both off the wagon WreckTangled! I hope you enjoy your day away. Happy Birthday for next week!
Isn't it amazing how quickly you lose fitness? A while ago I was out walking everyday. I haven't for 2-3 weeks (Weather, and my dodgy tum.) and went out for a walk today. My goodness I was shattered! I thought I'd been doing OK what with the yoga (No balance!) and daily mini workouts. Not so! I plan to walk again tomorrow and Sunday. No wonder I was struggling through Yoga!

Yes, I haven't been walking as much and I've really noticed it. Just goes to show walking really is so good for you. I managed to leg press 34kg today which I'm pleased with, I think I could go higher but I don't want to push it with my dodgy hips also I really didn't want to go to the gym, I wanted a nap instead, but I went and am obviously pleased I did.

I think you're amazing to keep going with your yoga, it's really not easy trying to do all of those moves!

Congrats on the leg press, well impressive! And well done on going to the gym. That's really good commitment.
Thank you for your kind words about yoga. I have been practicing the moves I find most difficult. I really have terrible balance. I think some of it during the class is fatigue too.
Yup, need to start walking again.

Thanks @73kittycat73. I haven’t the energy to pursue it all and sometimes the union was involved but they made all the really good union members redundant and some of it goes back years.

Had a really bad night with my arm for some reason. Plus I’ve run out of Metformin. So I need to ring the GP on Monday - also I’m overdue my HBA1C. I do think it will have increased again as I know i’ve not been as strict with myself. It’s like I can only deal with one ailment at a time - and all my energy is going on my arm at the mo!!

I’m going to go for my usual walk today, which I’ve not done for a couple of weeks. There’s a few nice days forecast, so will get back into it!!

Ever get a day when you're not in the mood for food.
Only junk.
That's me today.
I've already had some chocolate and some low cal crisp but it's just not doing anything for me.

@BorderlineHappy oh yes. I have those days. I’m afraid I give in to them at the moment!

Today I made pancakes with arrow root. I don’t make them often, but I really like them with pecans and drizzled with the Skinny Sauce maple syrup.

I made the kids pasta bake and has some of that.

@BorderlineHappy I’ve been craving Cheerios since I had a bowl last week when we came back from hols and had no food in - hell they were good!!

Sorry to hear that about your job PaperMonster. Maybe you are better off out of it? Would they give you a redundancy package?
Did you say Cheerios? I love Cheerios, specially the honey ones! Haven't had them for months... One day...
I have most days BorderlineHappy where I'd definitely like to survive on just chocolate and sweet stuff. I have a real sweet tooth. Shame we can't isn't it?! lol
Went for another walk today and spent the rest of the day in the garden. My mums' cake turned up and we had a slice each. My brother and his kids are coming round tomorrow to (Hopefully!) eat the rest. It was very nice.

Ah @PaperMonster sorry bout your job.

I dont think you realise how carb heavy your diet is,until you have to cut right back.

Im having a diet coke,with ice and lemon.

Oh my @BorderlineHappy I was really craving a Coke last night!! And I hardly ever used to drink it anyway!!

Re job - yes, I’ll get a bit of redundancy but not much. I work in education so there’s not much money about!!

@73kittycat73 that sounds like a lovely way to spend the day! I did much the same myself, sadly without the cake!! But did have a lovely time doing stuff with my daughter.

I've never tried coke with lemon before. I must admit, Pepsi Max is my cola of choice (Haven't had any but a sip for weeks now though.).
Are you going to look for another position PaperMonster, or get your arm sorted first? It must be quite scary facing redundancy, I hope you are OK?
Glad you had a nice day though. Same again today for me.

Thanks @73kittycat73 - not the first time I’ve been made redundant so feeling ok with it all really. I need to get this arm sorted though as it is really debilitating- I need help dressing!! So I’m sort of looking - if I could get something from September that would be great as long as my arm’s fixed!

I’ve been sitting in the garden - had to come in to cool down! No breeze today! What’s it like with you?

Found 2 nice low calorie and low carb drinks in Tesco.
Low calorie ginger ale and soda water with lime
Stuck them in the freezer until slushy,lovely.

Well good luck for finding something for September then, and to healing your arm. I got quite burned today, tops of my arms. I think it happened when I went for my walk as I was in the shade in the garden. I have some sun block but hate wearing it as I find all sun cream thick and gloopy, goes tacky when on. I suppose that's a silly reason not to wear it though, and it's better than sun burn! We had quite a breeze by evening, was scorching earlier on. Supposed to be even hotter tomorrow!
Soda water with lime sounds nice. You'll have to let us know how it tastes. Sounds very refreshing. Have you managed to catch any sun?
Is Wreck on holiday? I thought I read something about being away for a few days? Could have my wires crossed though. It's 1.37am and I can't sleep. :(

Hope you got some sleep in the end. I’ve been out for a walk with a friend today - eight miles. It’s a bit overcast here so ideal for a bit of a walk! Sorted out my GP appointment, my HBA1C appointment and my Metformin prescription. On it today!!

Hello, I'm here. Dh and I went to London this weekend without the dc, it was so lovely. We had Greek for dinner and, although I was happy to eat what I wanted, it was all pretty low carb apart from the pitta so was a really good choice.

It's 29° here today so pretty warm. Went to the gym this morning. It's my birthday tomorrow and we're going out for dinner then I MUST eat better again.