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My fucking neighbours

278 replies

CindersCatsSister · 31/01/2021 21:10

We have just finished a kitchen extension. 6 month build with all the attendant stresses. Older neighbours (late 60s) next door have for the hump because we raised the floor meaning that now they can see into our kitchen. We can’t see into their house at all. They’ve been on at us throughout the build to have the window frosted over, I’ve said no, I’m putting in plain glass and if needs be I’ll put some film over it.
Build finished 5 mins ago, I’ve been up to my ears in fucking homeschooling and working and life and all the bullshit and she sends her husband over to shout at us because there’s no film on the window and ‘I don’t want to see you in your kitchen, it’s like a shop window’. Said window is 135 x 50cm. Also, it’s facing onto their garden which is about 20 metres from the window. So it’s not in their face. I don’t necessarily think they’re wrong, if it’s pissing them off it’s pissing them off and ITS ON MY FUCKING LIST but just FUCK OFF YOU CUNTS WHY DOES IT MATTER??
Many thanks, I feel better now.

OP posts:
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GypsyRoseGarden · 31/01/2021 23:44

I'd put a one way mirror glass in the window - so all they can see is themselves, and you can look out and be completely unaffected - everyone is happy

I don't like fighting with neighbors - makes me unhappy and then I obsess over it and drive my husband nuts - we are in the middle of a project now - we regularly leave a very nice bottle of wine, and some type of food (choc/cookies/pie/cake ) on our neighbors door steps to say thanks for putting up with us (and the trucks, builders, etc) and giving an update as to how much longer it will be - its only a small thing but I hope at least it shows we are aware of how we are impacting everyone and grateful for their patience - I hope it helps a bit - we haven't had any issues so far (fingers crossed)

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 31/01/2021 23:50

I'd get mirror windows, so you can see out and they get the glare of the sun shining back at them.

sneakysnoopysniper · 31/01/2021 23:52

I would copy a "cease and desist" letter from Google in which you state that if they continue to harass or contact you further on this matter you there will be further action. Let them chew on that.

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TheNationsFavourite · 31/01/2021 23:53

Reminds me of former retired neighbours. He banged on the back door at half eight one morning to say a fox had got into our bin and scattered some paper on our mutual verge. DH had gone to work in the dark 2 hrs previously and not noticed it. I said I would get the DC sorted, off to school/nursery and then sort it out.
I got back and thought fuck it, I'll not be dictated to by him, I'll go out when I'm ready. I was also running a busy business from home whilst he was sunning himself in the conservatory, catching up with the Mail.

At 11am, I went out there and he had collected it into a carrier bag and hung it on our back gate. Wanker.

LondonStone · 31/01/2021 23:54

@BungleandGeorge Ah yes, I see what you mean.

Obviously the diagram isn’t to scale and I don’t know OP’s house so I can’t really comment on the exact situation. I just meant, all things considered, I would potentially be saying no politely.

In my last house the kitchen had about 1.5m between window and fence and I never a problem with light personally. Maybe my garden faced a good direction for sunlight or something but it was fine, bright even. The fence was a ugly huge brown thing (so not nice to look at) but it was a rental so couldn’t make any changes.

BungleandGeorge · 31/01/2021 23:55

I don’t think people are doing you any favours telling you to antagonise them further. I’d have a chat with your solicitor about your/their rights and make a decision from there

HazelBite · 31/01/2021 23:57

Don't put film on your glass it gives you a real sense of being shut in, they put it on our windows at work (as a security measure) and it was awful.
Buy some of those blinds that let the light it but stop people seeing in or you looking out less permanent than film and you can raise and lower them when required.
We have them at home, they weren't expensive and let in loads of light.

BungleandGeorge · 31/01/2021 23:59

[quote LondonStone]@BungleandGeorge Ah yes, I see what you mean.

Obviously the diagram isn’t to scale and I don’t know OP’s house so I can’t really comment on the exact situation. I just meant, all things considered, I would potentially be saying no politely.

In my last house the kitchen had about 1.5m between window and fence and I never a problem with light personally. Maybe my garden faced a good direction for sunlight or something but it was fine, bright even. The fence was a ugly huge brown thing (so not nice to look at) but it was a rental so couldn’t make any changes.[/quote]
The diagram shows the window on the boundary and since it’s an extension I presume it’s right up to the boundary. If there’s a gap of even 0.5 metres it doesn’t really matter as light will get in. If it’s on the boundary and the neighbours put a brick wall the other side it’s obviously a disaster!

SquirtleSquad · 01/02/2021 00:01

I'm so confused by the two or three posters here calling you and your friends horrible Grin

MrJollyLivesNextDoor · 01/02/2021 00:08

Ugh frosted film is horrible, I wouldn't do it

In an effort to diffuse the situation I would

  1. Try my best not to call them fucking lunatics to their faces
  2. Investigate some sort of suitable blind
  3. Drink wine

Not necessarily in that order! They sound bonkers

16purplecolour16 · 01/02/2021 00:08

This is why I’ll work till I drop; to keep my predisposition to ‘busy-body obsessive about nonsense’ well in check.

oakleaffy · 01/02/2021 00:09

@CindersCatsSister

That was the frosted version
Oh they are being fussy. A friend moved to new bungalow was sitting on the loo when a man rode by on his horse...at eye level with friend. Friend just bought film and put a stained glass panel in front of it.

Some people out the back had those massive bi fold doors on the back of their house...and that WAS like looking at a Zoo exhibit....
Luckily they put up curtains.

Which reminds me of this very human video.

....... {Oscar winning}

oakleaffy · 01/02/2021 00:13

Anyone with overlooking/overlooked neighbours.....

Give this a go... It stayed with me months after watching...Others might like it , too...It was suggested by a you tube algorithm, but glad it was suggested.

''The Neighbour's Window ''

darklady64 · 01/02/2021 00:16

Grin this reminds me of my MIL complaining that since the neighbours had had their extension built, she could see them wandering about in their kitchen in the nude. I tried it from the position she said she could see them from. You had to squeeze past a table into the window bay and then press your face against the glass and peer sidways! Bless her Hmm

SnapCracklesPop · 01/02/2021 00:16

I feel sorry for them. They just had to put with building work through lockdown when they are stuck at home, and they have to deal with a very unreasonable neighbour

who dares complaining about the stress of her own extension Hmm

It wouldn't kill you to put something.

Reinventinganna · 01/02/2021 00:19

You realise that you must only enter your kitchen whilst wearing a snorkel and tutu from now on?

LakeGeneva · 01/02/2021 00:22

Oh Christ some people do get like that when they're retired. My parents are the same: came to visit and moaned non stop about how they could see into next door's kitchen (it's a terrace, the kitchens face each other, this is normal) and also how they were "kept awake" by said next door leaving the kitchen light on. Like, wtf? I'd been there 18 months at that point, never noticed it, probably because I don't sleep standing up in the kitchen. I guess if that's all you have to focus on then that's where your focus goes but jfc.

Mamanyt · 01/02/2021 00:25

OK...long, rambling story coming up here. This reminds me of going to Woodstock in my youth (yes, I AM THAT OLD). There were a bunch of us skinny-dipping in a pond when the cops showed up. They told us, rather shame-faced, that we needed to put on swimwear, there had been a complaint. We looked around, and there wasn't a house we noticed anywhere. SO, we asked who had complained. One of the officers pointed up the hill at a house about a quarter of a mile away. Seems a little old lady lived there, and had complained. When asked if she was sure we were swimming naked, she replied, "OF COURSE! If I climb up on my kitchen counter with my binoculars, I can clearly see them!" I have to wonder if the families are related...

ZoolInMyFridge · 01/02/2021 00:26

But if building control have signed it all off with no frosted glass, then what can they do?? If it’s lawful - then don’t change it! And give them the planning depts number.

oakleaffy · 01/02/2021 00:29

@Mamanyt

OK...long, rambling story coming up here. This reminds me of going to Woodstock in my youth (yes, I AM THAT OLD). There were a bunch of us skinny-dipping in a pond when the cops showed up. They told us, rather shame-faced, that we needed to put on swimwear, there had been a complaint. We looked around, and there wasn't a house we noticed anywhere. SO, we asked who had complained. One of the officers pointed up the hill at a house about a quarter of a mile away. Seems a little old lady lived there, and had complained. When asked if she was sure we were swimming naked, she replied, "OF COURSE! If I climb up on my kitchen counter with my binoculars, I can clearly see them!" I have to wonder if the families are related...
That must have been magnificent! {Woodstock} Some people do like to get 'Outraged'.

A nightmare would have been Altamont... The dark compared to Woodstock's 'Light'.

PeggyHill · 01/02/2021 00:31

I would write "fuck off" in marker pen across every window that faces their house

Ringsender2 · 01/02/2021 00:33

I think you and your husband, AND your kids, should re-enact this picture as often as possible whilst pressed up to the window facing outwards

My fucking neighbours
BungleandGeorge · 01/02/2021 00:35

@ZoolInMyFridge

But if building control have signed it all off with no frosted glass, then what can they do?? If it’s lawful - then don’t change it! And give them the planning depts number.
They can do whatever they like on their side within planning rules. Planning permission doesn’t give you rights over their land
CausingChaos2 · 01/02/2021 00:38

Are you going to use mirror film or frosted? I imagine frosted would feel very hemmed in.

ChaToilLeam · 01/02/2021 00:40

Don’t pander to their bonkersness. If you don’t want film on the window, don’t have it. Let them grump.