Ever embarrassed yourself at hospital?

[QueenPaws]

Come and share while I recover with my Costa coffee
So I go for an ultrasound today, water drunk, mask and sanitiser. There's no traffic so I'm feeling all smug
Get in there and undo my jeans waistband to reveal I am wearing these
Me "oh ffs"
Staff howling

@SignOnTheWindow Haha, glad it wasn't just me!

As for gas & air, I remember desperately clinging to it when I was having DS3 and sucking on it for dear life while moaning to DH and the midwife that I wanted to go home... I was having a home birth

Apparently I swore at the staff after coming out of anesthetic. One of the staff kindly told me that, and I apologized over the next 2 days to anyone I met. They laughed it off! They were so kind.

During a pelvic exam in my early 20s I was seen by a female doctor that did the visual and speculum. During the manual exam I accidentally let out a few vocalization/moan when it hurt a little, and her colleague gave me a death stare. I turned red. Started worrying that they though it was a sex noise...just felt awful

Staying overnight on the children's ward on a fold up bed, I snored so loudly they gave me a private room to sleep in

@borntohula

Me too 🙈🙈 pushing and pooing away

The midwife said oh I can see you took your iron tablets

@Riv12345 my midwife tried to pretend it wasn't happening because I was begging to use the toilet! "If you go to the toilet now, you're having a baby there!"

Not me but my friend had a chiropractor crack her back the other week and it prompted a massive fart. I think it was more awkward the fact that neither of them mentioned it.

Thank you all for sharing these, they're cracking me up!

Mine was when I had a 5 day hospital stay in my mid 20s. I'd never had a hospital stay before. I'd been in a hospital gown since admission from A&E, and it wasn't until day 3 or so that I felt up to a shower. I asked for a fresh hospital gown as I'd felt so grim and sweaty after so long. They looked confused and said yes, they could get me one, but I could wear my own pyjamas if I preferred? I just felt mortified that I'd been in this grim, smelly gown for so long and not once had someone mentioned I could actually wear my own pyjamas - I felt disgusting!! (I just thought wearing hospital gowns was what you were supposed to wear...)

I went into labour with DS4 3 weeks early and hadn't fully packed by hospital bag (Rookie mistake). I was moving quickly so had about 5 minutes to get my ish together before leaving for the hospital. I had everything I needed in washing baskets in the corner of our room so DH and i just flung everything into a suitcase and I scooped my chargers and bedside drawer's contents into the bag (hand cream, etc) and got in the car. Midwife was helping DH unpack when she found a box of condoms in my suitcase and doubled over laughing. Quite embarassing but the giggles helped!

I had a team of 4 people checking a rash on my neck that a doctor noticed during an appointment. She seemed alarmed when she saw it and said she needed to get colleagues to check it. I never once thought to check it myself but 30 minutes later I got to look in a mirror while they were explaining why it was so concerning... It was a lovebite... I had to explain to the 5 medical professionals thinking I had some sort of horrific rash that it was just my husband acting like a teenager again

ARI in Aberdeen used to have a blood donor centre across the road from the front door. And people visiting from the isle could use the staff canteen, which was approximately a two day camel ride from said front door.

I gave blood, then set off to meet my mother in said canteen. Not the brightest move. Got to canteen, felt a bit light headed, so did the logical thing and lay down on the floor and put my legs in the air. In a room full of medical professionals getting their lunch

My mother was so mortified she rolled me over to a wall and tried to pretend I was part of the skirting

Taken in ambulance with horrendous pain, son had packed a bag for me. Got onto ward around 3 am. Plonked bag on floor next to bed, which set off the very loud farting teddy bear he had thoughtfully packed to cheer me up

@LittleOverwhelmed that has really made me giggle.

I went for a hospital appt with back pain . I'd been going regularly for two years . Appts were chats , never examinations. I was seeing a newish boyfriend straight after the hospital so for a joke had dressed in very skimpy pants & nipple tassels . Consultant asked me to take off my top & jeans .... oh the shame .

I had pethadine during labour with my first and oh my god I was high as a kite! Thankfully I can't remember most of the details, but I do remember talking absolute shit to a midwife whilst falling asleep and sliding off the birthing ball. Somehow I ended up naked, the toilet was down the corridor and they made me go every hour. They fashioned some sort of toga out of sheet, and I cringe at how many people saw me pretty much crawling along in
in a dazed and confused state in my toga! I also wee'd on the floor thinking it was my waters, vomited over the bed/floor multiple times and after one of my many toilet trips I told them I thought my mucus plug had fallen out, they found the biggest one ever stuck to my leg! Honestly it was just hideous! I just had gas and air with the next one!

In France. I popped the thermometer under my tongue instead of up my bum. The nurse looked at me as if I were mad.

In the high dependency unit with pancreatitis. Had tube in both nostrils, drips in both arms, catheterised and only semi conscious. Was told much later in that everyone one particular nurse came near me I cried like a baby. No idea why.
Would only let my dad give me a drink when I was starting to recover. No idea why but would take the drink off the nurses and hand it to my dad to hold while I sipped at the straw.
Topped my ridiculousness off before I was finally discharged by freaking out while spiking a fever, pulled out my catheter, feeding tube and drip

Love your underwear!

My embarrassing story is also an ultrasound one- I had been in hospital for quite a while so had stopped bothering wearing bras. Was taken down for an ultrasound and was chatting away to the sonographer about a shared hobby (I had a t shirt about it), he asked me to show him where the pain was and due to me being uncoordinated and distracted I ended up lifting my t shirt so far I flashed my boobs at him. The conversation was a lot more stilted after that

I fainted whilst having blood taken and was having a strange unconscious dream about being on a bus and thought the nurse trying to rouse me was the bus driver.

They put me in a side cubicle to recover and I burst into tears.

I react strangely to General Anaesthetic. Not allergic, just really messes with me afterwards. And apparently, sometimes, during.

I woke up in recovery surrounded by the surgical team- even the most senior ones. They were all fascinated to know what was the meaning of life. Turns out I’d woken up enough during wrist surgery to grasp the surgeon’s arm (nearly giving him a heart attack) and told him urgently that I’d figured it out, and it the answer was actually really simple and extraordinarily beautiful! I’d been so convincing, they’d all stuck around to see if I’d remembered it! They disappeared when I looked at them blankly, and the violent vomming started up.

Or how about in recovery from a minor(ish) abdominal surgery, when I came too feeling truly horrible. The nurse said most people were on their feet within 30 mins and to just pop on my street clothes while she did the paperwork so I could go. My DH was there to drive me. I tried valiantly to get off the bed. I made it halfway into my knickers when I semi collapsed across the floor, bed and chair. The air buildup inside me from the surgery was out of this world. I farted one long continuous sound for at least a minute and a half. It was a textured sound- sometimes mellifluous, sometimes guttural, frequently alien. About halfway through the mega fart, the chucking up began. All over the nurse, DH and my neat pile of clothes.

The nurse’s face was a picture. It hovered between ‘I’m certainly not paid enough for this!’ and ‘Wait till I tell the others at Friday night drinks!’. DH’s face was a mixture of concern for me, and the upholstery of his car. Not necessarily in that order of priority.

I tripped and broke a shoulder some years ago which was incredibly painful. Someone passing by called an ambulance (I was lying on a pavement howling). They administered G and A and morphine. I was off my tits! I mentioned the fact that I needed to get home to feed my baby to which they replied, 'You're going nowhere but hospital love'. I was in so much pain I handed my phone over so that they could call and inform DH. As the phone was ringing the paramedic suddenly said 'Oh, what's your husband's name?', 'What?; I replied (totally chugging down the G and A) 'What do you call your husband?'. To my eternal mortification I responded 'Growly Bear'.

I was off my face on various opiates following the delivery of my first baby. He was in SCBU and I woke up quite dazed at about 2am and very confused I started walking around the ward topless trying to find a member of staff to tell them I had lost my baby and my boobs were broken 😂

Doing a glucose tolerance test whike pregnant with dd1. I hate fizzy drinks, so drinking a pint of lucozade had been a struggle. I kept or down for 90 mins, burping away, however the last burp was not a burp. I showered several ladies waiting for their scans.

5 months later, giving birth to dd1, I was high on the g&A. Told the midwife to hurry up because I was late for my debut on Downton Abbey!! Afterwards I apologised if I'd been rude and she said I was the politiest lady she'd had for a while as I excised myself each time I burped

Calling my GP surgery about my baby boy & couldn't think of the appropriate word for a part of his body...so I called it a 'ball sac'. The receptionist giggled then composed herself & told me it was a 'testicle'. Mortified

The worst part is, I work in the NHS