Been in tears since 10am. I have a son with SEN and am battling to get him support and feel like I'm on a never-ending rollercoaster of phonecalls between CAHMS, GP, school etc etc. Trying to do my best for my son but it's an uphill struggle. We're seriously considering getting him assessed privately. I'm so stressed and worried. Also my own financial stress to contend with.
I also have a difficult relationship with my own father, we think he has the onset of dementia as he's very awkward to deal with (has never been easy to be honest but is slowly getting worse).He's getting very forgetful and contradicts himself constantly , also says people have said things when they most definitely havent and gets really angry and agitated when people try and tell him he's wrong . Last week he swore blind my old school friend lived on the same street as she did back in the 80s when o actual fact she'd moved to Ireland with her family long ago. He just wouldn't accept it and snaps "ok shut up, whatever" when we try to explain. He comes from a long line of personality disorders and volatile tempers, his brothers and dad were the same. Could be lovely but with that split personality lurking under the surface that would erupt the minutes things didn't go their way. He's been divorced from my mum for a few years now but still in regular contact. So today I took dad for an optician appointment, we agreed previously that I'd drop him off as close to the opticians as I could and go and find somewhere to park and he would go in for his appointment. He would then ring me when he was done and I'd drive back round and pick him up. He can't walk far you see. So I went off to sit in the car in a car park not too far away when a withheld number calls me saying it's the optician and can you come and collect your dad. I thought it odd as dad has his phone on him. Drove round and dad had a face like thunder standing outside, marched over to the car, yanked the door handle so hard and shouted "my mobile ran out of battery, the staff had to call you to tell you I was ready" . People were looking as they walked past, I felt very embarrassed. Proceeded to scream at me the whole journey home (20 min) with profanities. Turns out he's tried to ring me, his battery was flat and somehow this is my fault. I said calmly please don't shout at me, it's not my fault and he said "it f well is" . I always find shouting back makes him louder. I was shaking. Dropped him home, he slammed my door so hard on his way out.
I've come back to my house sobbing and shaking.
I'm sorry this thread is a bit rambling and disjointed. I just needed to get it out. My mum panders to him a bit but she knows what he's like, she just said it frustrated him when he couldn't get hold of me. I still don't see how screaming abuse at me is going to help matters!
It's made me feel so.low, anxious and worthless. If it wasn't for my son and little dog I would give up.