When I’m prime minister...

[ASimpleLobsterHat]

the first law I’m making is to ban garden lights - I’m fed up of all our neighbours here lighting up their gardens like they’re the bloody Blackpool illuminations - all through the night. There is no need and it must be terrible for wildlife, as well as my sleep.

What about you, what would your first act as prime minister be?

Ending the practice of putting clocks back in winter.

I will ensure a return to Cabinet Government. There would also be additional policing provided in Midsomer, the murder rate is unacceptable for such a small rural place.

True StarlightLady, why people still choose to live in Midsomer given the huge risk to their lives is beyond me

I want to be Queen.

the Queen....not Brian May et al. I am not the least bit musical.

Divide every village/town/city into two zones - one for dog owners, and one for non-dog owners, so that non-dog owners didn’t need to dodge dog shit on the pavement or be disturbed by dogs barking through the day.

The Midsomer crime rate is no laughing matter.

In addition, country wide, I will introduce spot checks of men, to ensure their underwear is of an acceptable standard. Things need to be improved!

To be fair @StarlightLady I buy Dh underwear ,and I did buy him a packet of underpants in very questionable colours from Sainsbury's as they were half price 😂

@AgentProvocateur I like the idea of dog zones!

Introduce a dog keeper's licence, which cannot be obtained until a proper dog 'driving test' has been passed. I'm so fed up of ignorant irresponsible dog owners giving the rest of us a bad name!

Ban those bloody stupid car headlights that blind everyone on the roads.

@x2boys - so he would only pass the spot check because you buy them for him! At least he would pass, but this is a serious matter. The strictest penalties should apply.

Litter droppers & owners of dogs fouling, apart from a fine give community service.

Ban chewing gum

Bring back the death sentence for people who lick their fingers when turning pages

Make all workplaces scent-free, so nobody is allowed to wear perfume to work

Extend the smoking ban even further

Blocking bits of the road with bins to keep a car parking space for one’s car - immediate £1000 fine and imprisonment for repeat offenders.

Stop giving money to people that don't want to work. Have them do jobs that benefit the community and give them a wage instead. They don't wanna work, they don't get paid.

Ban ear piercing for babies and those huge jo jo bows for girls hair..you know, the ones that are actually bigger than the childs head!!

Cancel HS2 ... immediately and without further discussion.

Ban hunting properly
Ban bright headlights
Increase Sunday shopping hours
Make prescriptions and sanitary products free.
Change the law so insurance companies have to insure you even if you're are high risk like in a flood zone.
Increase spending in the Nhs.
Ban testing on animals.
Make nursing home care free.

£200 fine for each dog poo left plus £100 of that to be paid to the person with evidence you did it. Like a TV license you will be put in prison if you dont pay.

As prime minister I will also give myself powers to take car keys off anyone I think drives like a twat.