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MARY POPPINS I AM BLOODY WELL NOT

81 replies

MarchionessofActon · 20/11/2020 13:31

I’ve been a nanny for ten years, with this family for 3.

The children aren’t young anymore, they are 6 and 9, but it’s still my full time job even though they’re at school. Believe me, there’s plenty to do during the day.

Their mum was never one for enforcing boundaries or being firm (that’s my job) but since March she’s been working from home and the children have got really used to having her there, and she is prone to being a complete soft touch with them which makes my job harder but there we go.

As many six year olds are wont to do, the youngest gives her the run around at bedtime (I do all the actual bath/bed/story bits, I leave when she comes up to say goodnight) I’m sure you know the sort of thing, anything to delay the actual going to sleep, like, ‘my bum is itchy’ (means Mum will get him up to come and have the worm medicine) or ‘Olivia didn’t want to play with me today’ (mum will spend upwards of forty minutes talking about friendship issues and conflict) ‘I don’t like the crease in my duvet’ (Mum will spend ten minutes re-making the bed and checking for imaginary creases)

I can tell when they have an actual issue, don’t get me wrong, but I’m experienced enough to recognise delaying tactics when I see them.

Anyway, smallest one has been going to sleep quite late. My boss asked me to stay over the time I normally leave because she hasn’t been able to get her to stay in her bed all week. So I do, and after a few firm ‘get back in your bed and close your eyes’ and zero indulgence of invented problems she was spark out asleep.
I went downstairs and told my boss who was very grateful. And I go on my merry way home.

An hour later I’m having dinner with my husband when my boss texts me and informs me that said child has woken up. She said

‘Priscilla was unfortunately not in a deep sleep as you thought she was and has now woken up and will not get back into bed. I think next time it would be great to be super vigilant to ensure the sleep she is in is a proper sleep and not one where she wakes up after a short time. I’m afraid she will be quite tired and grumpy tomorrow. I just thought I should let you know’

I just said ‘ok’ because my husband and I were laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of it.

Honestly, I know I’m good at my job, but enduring a child remains asleep from my flat five miles away when I’ve clocked off for the night...clearly beyond my capabilities and I have failed at being the Mary Poppins standard that is expected of me Grin

I am being lighthearted about it but it is another thing to add to the long list of times when parents come to expect the impossible.

Please do share any incidents of your employers or co-workers being utterly ridiculous in their expectations...

OP posts:
FieldOverFence · 20/11/2020 13:45

My mind is just boggling here at parents who can't get a 6 and 9 year old to bed at night without needing their childcare provider to do overtime Shock

I do remeber an office colleague who worked for me in customer service wanting me to guarantee the he wouldn't have to deal with angry customers. We were a broadband provider, angry people was part of the gig .... I did ask him would he like me, his manager, to screen income calls and only give him the pleasant one ?

MarchionessofActon · 20/11/2020 13:53

I imagine you get a lot of unreasonable expectations in customer service! But usually from the customer, not the employee 😂

Oh the not being able to ‘do’ bedtime is very normal in the families I’ve worked for, I’ve seen it so many times!

OP posts:
ILoveYourLittleHat · 20/11/2020 13:58

‘Priscilla was unfortunately not in a deep sleep as you thought she was and has now woken up and will not get back into bed. I think next time it would be great to be super vigilant to ensure the sleep she is in is a proper sleep and not one where she wakes up after a short time. I’m afraid she will be quite tired and grumpy tomorrow. I just thought I should let you know’

This is one of the best things I've read on MN.
And I am super vigilant. I just thought I should let you know OP Grin

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Sometimesonly · 20/11/2020 14:01

I am a TEFL teacher and a student once complained that he had been watching a film at 11pm and there was a phrase he didn't understand in English so he wrote me an email. As I didn't write back straight away maybe teachers should also give their students their phone numbers for these emergency situations. Grin

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 20/11/2020 14:02

I will bet my house and all my savings, and my first-born child, that mum is also on MN. Grin Based on your description of her.

Santaisironingwrappingpaper · 20/11/2020 14:06

What sort of bed has Priscilla? Maybe a few cable ties would sort her out....

Coffeeoverload · 20/11/2020 14:07

Oh god. Those parents sound like twats. Sorry OP Flowers

MarchionessofActon · 20/11/2020 14:14

Hilariously I think they think I employ some sort of sorcery with the children when I do bedtime, that they can’t possibly posses because of not being a professional nanny.

Every time I tell them it’s just a case of being firm and a refusal to put up with any silliness, they say ‘oh but you’re so modest, we know there’s more to it than that!’

They pay very well, and always on time, so there’s a LOT I let go.

OP posts:
Grimbot · 20/11/2020 14:14

Shock that’s just incredible. You are a lot more patient than me to just reply ‘ok’ to that text.

I had quite a few moments when I worked in a bookshop. One that springs to mind was a very well dressed man with a phd full on screaming at me at full volume because I couldn’t order a book for him as it wouldn’t be published for another 6 months and wasn’t available for preorder. I was just a bit Hmm that a grown adult could actually full on lose it about something so trivial. But I had several similar incidents from other customers. I am always very nice to retail staff as a result.

I later worked as a PA and all I can say is it very much prepared me for my current role as a stay at home mum as there were daily tantrums from a lot of the senior staff I worked with Grin

SingingSands · 20/11/2020 14:16

I think you've gone above and beyond in staying until the little darlings are not only put to bed, but asleep! Do these parents do any actual parenting?!

I received an email the other day from a lawyer (I am a PA). Haven't been in the office since March, nobody has. Anyway, email says "Documents relating to matter XYZ. I assume you know where they are, can you deal with them?"

Firstly, I don't work for this person. Secondly I have no knowledge of or exposure to this matter. Thirdly: No, I don't know where the documents are. So sorry, my crystal ball isn't working Hmm

NannyR · 20/11/2020 14:18

As a fellow nanny, I can totally sympathise with you! I've worked for very similar parents over the years.
The not wanting to put your own kids to bed thing is quite common but it does baffle me - I've had jobs where I would be doing bath, stories, school reading books etc whilst the parents were downstairs enjoying a glass of wine, in my experience that is the time when kids really open up about things that are bothering them or things they are excited about, as a parent, why would you want to miss out on that time?

At the other end of the spectrum, I've been in my current job nearly three years and I was talking to a nanny friend the other day about it - the only thing I could think of that annoys me about the job was that they don't separate whites and coloured laundry and the white clothes are always grey, and that was literally the only bad thing!! They are such a nice, easy going, respectful family to work for.
So the nice jobs do exist out there!

Toddlerteaplease · 20/11/2020 14:19

@Santaisironingwrappingpaper

What sort of bed has Priscilla? Maybe a few cable ties would sort her out....
Nearly so at my coffee out. GrinGrin
Toddlerteaplease · 20/11/2020 14:21

I wondered about the parents not wanting to do bedtime. My dads favourite part of our childhood was reading us bed time stories.

Inmyownlittlecorner · 20/11/2020 14:24

I was once told not to take the child I was nannying for near any roads. This was in Central London near The Natural History Museum. On a main road.

MarchionessofActon · 20/11/2020 14:26

Oh it’s very common in the households I’ve worked in that the nanny does bedtime always. And these guys have a weekend nanny too, so it’s very rare they have to do anything like reading, nit check, hairwash, nail clipping etc etc! In my old job I had to present the bathed and pj-ed children to the parents in the living room to say good night and chat very briefly about the day’s accomplishments just before I took them up, just like a Victorian nanny might have done!

OP posts:
NancysDream · 20/11/2020 14:36

Supercalafragifuckinggotobednow and a spoonful of go away it's bedtime should do it.

NancysDream · 20/11/2020 14:37

Mary poppies drugged them to sleep with magic medicine, so I'm not sure anyone should be parenting that way any way

TokyoSushi · 20/11/2020 14:39

Fabulous!

MarchionessofActon · 20/11/2020 14:40

That’s true, although most job adverts usually cite Mary Poppins as the ideal nanny they’re looking for! It annoys me every time. She. Was. A. Fictional. Character. With actual magic at her disposal.

Haha Inmyownlittiecorner I can absolutely imagine a parent saying something like that.

OP posts:
KindergartenKop · 20/11/2020 14:47

So what do they actually do with their kids?

TableFlowerss · 20/11/2020 14:47

That’s a mental story. Don’t know why they bothered having kids if they can’t cope - literally.

Christ, parents up and down the land deal with this each night. Those kids will grow up imo to have issues, because on the one hand they have parents, but those parents don’t actually parent them.....

Audreyhelp · 20/11/2020 14:55

Oh my I work for parents like this . I got a text saying did you realise he was only pretending to be asleep .?

Playdead · 20/11/2020 15:00

Wow. All I can say is wow. I didn't realise there were still people like that out there.

Can you renegotiate your working hours?

dottiedodah · 20/11/2020 15:21

Just trying to get my head round 40 minutes of "friendship issues and conflict here!" Maybe DC will be going for a job in UN? No wonder she finds it hard to stay asleep! I used to work in a Nursery ,and so many parents would not wish their child to have a Daytime Nap! (Very hard to keep a 2 year old from dropping off though!) I think your employer is being ridiculous TBH!

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 20/11/2020 15:22

I think you need a 'Sleeping Mallet'