What would you say to your 18-year-old self?

[bearlyactive]

This has probably been done before, but a group chat of mine was talking about this earlier and I didn't know what to say!

What would you say?

Don't settle down at 19 with that absolute wanker you are about to meet, he will take everything from you. Just wait and everything will work itself out.

You are enough - don’t change yourself for others.
Save, save, save.
Put yourself first.
Don’t be afraid to cut toxic people out of your life.
Don’t marry a man with children.

Have more confidence in yourself, stay in the army an become a nurse.

To fucking save money, and start a pension as soon as you start earning.
I didn’t, I’m 43 and shitting myself!

Love yourself, plan your future, keep decent friends and stay away from Booze!

It'll all be alright in the end. You're ok.

Travel even more for longer and further. Have a few more flings just for the sake of a good fuck.

You are making the right choices. Enjoy them and don't waste so much energy on doubt and worry.

You are NOT fat ....... yet.

Apply to that other uni, you will get the grades!

Don’t be flattered by the attention of you know who, he is a knob.
Yes he shagged her, trust your instincts. He’s a knob.
Do not move in with him!!! He’s a knob!!!!!

Step away from the weed.

You have a fab figure wear the bloody teeny tiny dress, wear the lipstick and ditch those crappy tunics.

You are enough.

Don’t go to Tenerife.

You need to be more confident and resilient. You are far cleverer than most people you will meet in life, you just don’t believe it now. You need to feel okay with failure and struggling sometimes or you’ll spend far too long starting new things and giving up too easily.

Don’t bother trying to get anywhere a virus and dp’s cancer will wipe you out financially

Educate yourself about food and nutrition. And find an exercise that you like.

Do more raving and take more drugs and have more fun while you can and your body is more still working and it's the 90s. This won't last.

Don't leave uni and fall into any old job. Do a masters. Learn some interview skills.

You have ADHD. You are not stupid.lazy or useless. Get diagnosed and treated as soon as the worlds onboard that inattentive ADHD is a thing.

Get some treatment for your mental health, it's only going to get worse.

Drink some bloody water ffs. Eat more vegetables. Do some exercise. Reduce your stress. Meditate. Your physical health is going to get really shit so try to get ahead of it.

Some of these are sad and resonate with me.

I would tell myself:
"You are not ugly like the school bullies told you"
"Stop sleeping with guys who show you an inch of interest"
"Do not choose 'that' degree. It will not assist you in gaining entrance into your desired field"
"Make the most of eating like a horse and staying trim"
"Get some counselling for your abandonment issues"

I was suicidal, I'd tell myself to go ahead and do it-it's really not been worth it.

Don't be a dick about doing your a levels.

Otherwise crack on as you are, I very much enjoyed that time in my life!

Study hard, stay single, start a pension, don't have kids.

I'd tell her how much she will achieve and to believe in herself.

I'd tell her not to marry that conceited yet insecure man who gives so little and instead go for someone warm, chatty and fun. I'd tell her what a great Mum she will be.

Id tell her to take up fitness and healthy eating and drinking.

You think things are bad now (and they are) but it is downhill from here ...

Don't believe it when people say "You are marrying him, not his family".
And don't be afraid to do something for yourself once in a while, you don't have to please other people all the time.

When I was 18 everyone I knew - my entire peer group in my city, seemed cooler, more intelligent and more switched on than me. It made life very exciting as I seemed surrounded by incredible people.

As I've got older I've come to realise that so much of that was just the swagger of youth, and so many people I sort of worshipped have sort of screwed up their lives.

I'm now married with two lovely teenaged children, living a happy life with my DH. But my world is a much more boring place not feeling surrounded by people I thought were way better than me. In fact it's sometimes quite isolating to be the one that things worked out for, if you see what I mean!

Stay away from CEO's and surgeons... they are sociopaths and will not give you the stability you are looking for. You make it all on your own in the end. Nobody looks after you better than you. Well done on the pensions and investments, you fucking smart cookie!

for all of you who've had a rough time

That what has happened to you before this point and what will happen after this point will make you a much stronger and more resilient person and you will be able to give that strength back to other people that need it. It will be a bumpy ride but you never stop smiling.