The most insensitive comment youve heard?

[pallyfally]

A year ago today, my then DP of 4 years told me I was pathetic for crying when I had a very early miscarriage. I left soon after but it hurt me in a way I can’t really remember now but know at the time I was flooded with pain by his comment.

A friend of mine had just finalised her divorce and we had gone for a girl lunch with three others. One of our friends said ‘what’s it like being back on the shelf and knowing you won’t be coming back down?’ Friend was 35 at the time, she was so upset.

Just got me thinking how awful people can be sometimes. I think it says a lot more about them and how they are feeling than the person the comments are directed at. Still shocking and shit though!

[MattBerrysHair]

This isn't as bad as some examples on here, but it floored me at the time as it was so unexpected.

Dsis has cerebral palsy and learning difficulties and to make sure she was well-provided for our grandad left her half his estate and split the remaining half between the other 7 grandchildren. Growing up my family was always on benefits and lived in council houses etc. I was helping dsis talk to estate agents and solicitors during a house purchase, for which she used the inheritance as a deposit, and I was telling MIL about it. I said "grandad had left dsis a large amount of money, 90k!" MIL just looked at me coldly and said "actually 90k isn't a lot of money". Well, It's fucking loads of money when you've never had any!

[May172010]

Celebrating my lovely friend’s 30th birthday in France with 3 other girls. Me and one girl were married and my friend and two other girls were single and really wanted to meet someone. I knew this was a sensitive subject. The married girl said two things that annoyed me so much “Gosh, I would hate to be single this late in my life (we were all early 30es...) and would be so desperate to meet someone. Followed by, I would hate to be an “old mum” (she was pregnant)”. WTF! I had a go at her. Who says that to a bunch of single women when you know they really want to meet someone. My lovely friend was so upset.

[OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow]

Nothing like the cockheads upthread, but two stick out, when my df unexpectedly died, mums neighbour was there next day and said “Well, you’ll meet someone else.”
And when I had my boy twins, my dfil, first thing he said “Oh god, more boys.” And no he wasn’t being light hearted.

[Kirstyinnorway]

My baby died when I was 21 weeks pregnant. We got zero support from my in-laws which was bad enough for me but awful for my poor DH. We tried to have a calm conversation about it but they didn’t think they’d done anything wrong. They told us “it’s unhealthy to keep speaking about this. You’re going to lose all your friends. You need to just move on”. It had only been 4 months. Then MIL said “you have to remember that we’ve lost a grandchild too.” I genuinely saw red and told her to fuck off - the first time I’ve ever sworn in front of them. I don’t regret it. The pain that caused was physical.

[Ideasplease322]

When I was at school my former told everyone her uncle doscrobed me as the ugliest cow he had ever seen. I was 14.

When I cried, she asked why I was upset because it wasn’t as if I was an oil painting.

I have never told anyone that. Needless to say the friendship did not survive

[Ibuiltthiscityonrocknroll]

Midwife when I’d just GIVEN BIRTH to first born dd via cs and milk hadn’t come through properly so was trying a bottle of formula: ‘oh, I see you’ve got the polyfilla out already...’

[MasksGlovesSoapScrubs]

Sorry to hear some of these they are awful.

I have OCD and severe anxiety with health anxiety chucked into all as well, brilliant.

'You really need to stop being such a fucking freak and get over it.'

By a family member

[nearlynermal]

"I wouldn't feel so bad about dying if I thought somebody loved you." Thanks mum.

[HowFastIsTooFast]

Nowhere near as bad as some of the thundercunts mentioned above, but apparently my maternal grandmother declared 'oh my heart sank to my boots when I they said it was another girl' on being asked about her new grandchild (me).

Nobody will be surprised to hear that my younger half-brother was her clear favourite grandchild

[mrssunshinexxx]

Mil a couple weeks after my mum had died and I had just had my first baby ' I feel like I won't get to be a grandma now because of what's happened'

[Iggypoppie]

@nearlynermal your mum sure had a way with words

[OhTheRoses]

Must remind self to say "aren't some people cunts" every time I hear stuff like this. They might start a thread

[NeverAMillionMilesAway]

@WhodidyousayIshouldbe

After miscarrying for the first time (at 16 weeks), a female colleague said "well it's not like it was a real baby".

I'm still trying to work out what it really was.....

I was facing some medical issues that meant I would likely struggle to conceive.

"Well, with your face, it's not like it was ever going to be easy anyway"
I THINK/hope said as a joke without really thinking about what they were saying, but at the time, it really hurt.

[Iggypoppie]

My best friend, mother who'd just given birth to two dc in around a year.

"I'm so glad I managed to have my second before I turned 40. I'd hate for my ds to be an only child".

Says to me, 40 year old, single, mother of 1 (not by choice).

[AlexCabot]

I'm adopted so I've heard loads.
The one that stuck the most was someone who said at my sister's wake "Well it's not like you were proper sisters".

I'm the only one of my siblings who is adopted so I've heard a variation on this several times but I was 17 and my sister had died suddenly at 25 years old.

[whydoIhavetodoeverything]

When I was newly diagnosed with breast cancer and someone said that I could cure it by humming at it

[Anotherlovelybitofsquirrel]

Jesus. Some, most are horrific.

'Why are you so upset, you haven't seen her for ages". My mum when a good friend died, I hadn't seen for a year or so due to distance.

[NeverAMillionMilesAway]

@WhodidyousayIshouldbe, I'm not quite sure how I quoted your post when I replied- I honestly didn't mean to and I am sorry.
I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Moreira]

Christ some of these are awful.

@Spaghettio I’m so sorry you know such an insensitive idiot.

[Fiona1987]

Coworker of mine got proposed to. She said to another colleague in the office who was also engaged but not in a hurry to get married and 31 at the time: "You have to hurry, you're getting old now"

I hated the bi*ch. She got away with so much bad behaviour in the company, it was mind-boggling.

[norbert23]

I was 7 when my mum died and have lost count of the number of people who've told me that it's not so bad because i was too young to understand. Bizarrely I think most people think they're being nice / comforting.
My dad also got the "you're lucky your wife died and you don't have an ex to deal with" comment once and that was awful.
Big hug to everyone xx

[staruponawish]

When I discovered my ex husband had left me because he had been having an affair with a woman 14 years older than me. My father: "Oh, she must have been better in bed than you." Seriously, he seriously said that to me.

[ChristmasArmadillo]

“I figured something like this would happen to you someday, your life has been too easy and it never stays like that.”
Helpful. And I actually highly doubt the individual in question had, in fact, figured I’d have a stillborn daughter or such like.

[Level75]

Male 'friend' to my DH. Discussing infertility as friend's wife struggling to concieve #2 after an easy first pregnancy. We'd had 5 rounds of IVF without success trying for #1 - 'Its not as bad for you because you don't know what you're missing out on'.