If I said "get some cheese spread"

[PomBearWithoutHerOFRS]

What would you get - Dairylea type, or Philadelphia type?
What would you call the other type?

Spready cheese in a tub could be either.

Why didn't you just say Dairylea or Laughing Cow or whatever?

I remember the orange cheddar spread in a jar from the 70s too, lived it. I'm partial to the Mclellands Seriously Strong spread now, Dairylea and Laughing Cow are a bit bland for me.

Primula.

Dairylea, or maybe that one in the tub - Cathedral City? Those are cheese spreads. Anything else is cream cheese.

Neither. I wouldn't know what you meant. Philadelphia is cream cheese. Cheese spread isn't a thing in this house. Are we missing something?

In this house it would mean Philadelphia. But we have various descriptions of cheese that make sense to us but not to anyone else...
Cheese spread... Philadelphia to go on crackers
Cream cheese.. someone is making cheesecake
Cheese sticks... Portions of cheddar for picnic or packed lunch
Orange cheese... Red Leicester slices
Spicy cheese... Chilli cheese slices
Cheeseboard cheese... Blocks of cheese, brie, roule etc
Great Cheese.. bag of grated. Small child name that stuck

We would be more specific for anyone else, but would expect each other to get right cheese otherwise.

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult

Dairylea, philadelphia is soft cheese.

This.

I would want the Philadephia type, though, and blow a fuse at being given Dairylea.

Dairylea.

This is the best Primula, I had it every day in my lunch sandwiches
www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/primula-cheese-spread--with-shrimp--tube-150g

I've possibly missed the point but is there any reason you couldn't have been specific and named the actual cheese spread that you wanted him to buy for you?

"Philadelphia in a tub" or whichever brand name you wanted is much easier than leaving it to guesswork.

Dairylea/primula/laughing cow

I would have to ask for clarification, it's not something we buy. DH doesn't eat cheese and I only buy the blocky stuff.

Any cheese is revolting. You asked me the wrong thing. You made your OP sound totally different to what you actually asked for.

For not me.

Dairylea. Philadelphia is Philadelphia.

I think the OPs case is even stronger with "spready cheese" because it is clear she wants cheese that is spreadable and there is no way anyone could ever describe Philadelphia as actual CHEESE. It's Cream Cheese that in no way tastes like CHEESE.

The word cheese looks weird now and I'm wondering if I spelt it right.

Those spready cheeses should be banned because they are all vile but seeing as they are available and the OP was clear what she asked for, SINBU!!

@PomBearWithoutHerOFRS

I asked for "spready cheese, in a tub, not the triangles cos I can't unwrap them". I shocked myself with the rage I got when he got back, it's taken a while to realise it's a "final straw" thing. (And why I avoided AIBU cos I possibly probably am)

If you are going to say all that, why not just be specific about what cheese you mean?

I’d assume it was the primula type cheese or the stuff you get in a squeeze metal toothpaste tube. Philly is soft cheese surely?

I’d have got delicious soft spreadable goats cheese.
Dairylea is for children.
Philadelphia is soft cheese not cream cheese. Cream cheese is a glorious treat of fatty luxury. Philly is bland and tasteless

I'd think primula.

First thoughts were primula or dairylee. The other type is soft cheese.

I can't stand the bought stuff so I make my own with grated strong cheddar type cheese, a small sweet chopped onion and mayonnaise mixed in a food processor.

And the award for most wanky, earth mother post of the week goes to ....

My XP wouldn't eat cheese. Unless it was in a triangle. At all. Or cheesecake (because it had cheese in it) or any form of food that had any type of cheese (like cheese sauce). It wasn't the taste, he just didn't like the idea of cheese.

He'd eat Tiramasu by the bucketload. When I pointed out that marscapone is a type of cheese, he was aghast.

But he eats like a toddler anyway.

Primula is spready cheese, The prawn one is yum...

although you could spread Philly, chop some chives in it and sprinkle with salt and it's a damn good sandwich.