If I told you I feel like this, what would you say to me?

[Pickypolly]

Professional job, high up, years of experience.
But, for about 6 months feeling:
Paranoid, like they are all talking about how crap I am but no one wanting to tell me.
Waiting to fuck up and make a mistake at any moment,
Undermined, incompetent, questioning about what I’ve done/am doing raises anxiety levels, makes me be defensive.
Overwhelmed with workload, dreading opening emails because I know it’s more work being piled on.
Not sleeping. Physical symptoms...and I have not had a day off sick for about 15 years, so I’m never ever sick.

Did you never feel like this before you in your life?

No.

Peri-menopause.

You sound very stressed. You should talk to your gp/boss/hr because this doesn’t sound sustainable.

Has your work changed- management, quantity, expectations?

If you had to take a wild guess.. what do you think might be bothering you a lot deep down? Pandemic is obvious candidate, but see if you can think of other possibilities, too.

Stress/burn out. Not uncommon at all (but pretty bloody awful). GP/Occupational Health.

How old you? Very common to have these feelings from peri-menopause.

Has there been a change in how you’re managed/actual issues at work?

How old are you? Perimenopause possibly.

I am peri meno yes, it’s the only explanation.

I’m not going batshit then?!

Is there someone in particular who is undermining/bullying you e.g. boss, competitive colleague?

Pandemic, can’t face it all again. Don’t know how I got through it the first time. Horrific.
New management, poor management in previous manager. Treated badly.

Get HRT if you haven't already. It's a lifesaver.

Still having regular periods though.

Still having regular periods though.

That's irrelevant. You can still need HRT.

i.stuff.co.nz/life-style/well-good/teach-me/113666670/perimenopause-lead-up-to-menopause-very-uncomfortable-and-poorly-understood

Have you never had a day off sick in 15 years?

Palpitations and anxiety were my main symptoms and waking up at night, I'm 48 and started HRT in February and feel like me again

No, I do not do sick at all. No sick time at all until last night. Headache that would not shift so dang up & didn’t go in. I never ever do that.
I don’t even know what the sickness process is.

Imposter syndrome?

Definitely.

@Pickypolly
You have described me two years ago, on the brink of resigning from a City job.
Thank god for HRT.

For me this was peri menopause
I’m avoiding HRT for now as I have a family history of breast cancer. Currently on fluoxetine for anxiety

Are you sure it is you and not 'them'? To be honest, you sound like you are describing a toxic work environment.

Do you drink wine? I found that when my evening drinking crept up, this kind of anxiety started to really affect my life. Feel much calmer after cutting down drastically.

I am peri meno yes, it’s the only explanation

Sounds like classic symptoms of stress (or manifestation of depression)

What you write will strike a chord with many IN High pressuRed jobs