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Original poster

14 year old only eating rubbish when left alone

103 replies

losenotloose · 30/09/2020 18:04

Would this annoy you? I can't tell if I'm expecting too much. Ds1 is having to isolate at the moment due to a positive test in his bubble. We have plenty of food in the house he could eat but he just eats rubbish. As an example today he's eaten plain boiled noodles, a scotch egg, a giant cookie and a packet of crisps. He ate similar yesterday. I buy these things to go in packed lunches and as occasional treats. I'm disappointed that he is lazy to even make a sandwich but also doesn't see the big deal. Am I wrong to just stop buying this stuff? Packed lunches can be boring from now on.

OP posts:
ChrisPrattsFace · 30/09/2020 18:26

Why are you so bothered by it?
It’s totally normal. It’s not like it’s every day.

Sarahandduck18 · 30/09/2020 18:27

Wow you need to reign in your expectations!

“All the treats” is only 2 cookies and 2 packs of crisps?

If he’s normally healthily active he can burn off a few treats.

Stop making food such an issue and power struggle.

How will he learn if you don’t let him make his own choices?

It’s a cookie not cocaine!

vanillandhoney · 30/09/2020 18:27

@losenotloose

I'm really surprised at the comments. No veg, no fruit just processed rubbish but it's fine!
You really need to chill out.

It's not his permanent diet. He's stuck at home bored. Very few teenagers are going to go and make themselves a nice, well-balanced meal. Hell, look at all the adults who put on weight over lockdown because they were stuck at home and bored with nothing to do.

Like I said above, my parents were very keen on "healthy eating" and as soon as I left home, I went entirely in the opposite direction and lived off instant noodles and popcorn for the next few years. Have the healthy stuff in and let him have access to it. Cook healthy dinners. But don't make him feel bad for eating instant noodles and cookies.

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JamieLeeCurtains · 30/09/2020 18:28

Nutritionally, there's not a whole heap of difference between plain noodles and a scotch egg, and a ham & egg sandwich, tbh...

... with which one might eat some crisps.

Followed by a cookie for dessert.

Spiderbaby8 · 30/09/2020 18:28

Does he need to be obese for me to be concerned?

You brought up the obesity epidemic.

Original poster
losenotloose · 30/09/2020 18:28

My parents were overly strict with food/treats and I think it's what pushed me to go totally in the opposite direction when I got the chance!

Yep. Really. Such a restrictive approach to food leads to teens going to town on junk whenever they get the chance. As you are now finding out.

I don't agree with this. For one, I've given a snapshot and assumptions have been made. If you asked my dc they would not say they were restricted. Also, I know many obese dc, my two nephews included, who have no restrictions and it hasn't led to self control.

OP posts:
Original poster
losenotloose · 30/09/2020 18:30

He sounds completely normal. Most teenagers won’t make themselves a delicious plate of steamed vegetables when they are hungry
Why is mumsnet like this? I wish I hadn't posted. Who mentioned steamed veg? I was talking about a sandwich.

OP posts:
Smallsteps88 · 30/09/2020 18:30

Ok well clearly you’d already decided that you’re right and any other response is wrong so I’m not sure what you wanted from this thread.

CakeGirl2020 · 30/09/2020 18:31

Look feed the child some veg with his dinner and chill out

vanillandhoney · 30/09/2020 18:31

I don't agree with this. For one, I've given a snapshot and assumptions have been made. If you asked my dc they would not say they were restricted. Also, I know many obese dc, my two nephews included, who have no restrictions and it hasn't led to self control.

Why ask for opinions if you're just going to disagree with everyone? Seems like you just expected everyone to agree with you?

I mean, you can disagree with my experience all you like, but I lived it and it's certainly what happened!

CakeGirl2020 · 30/09/2020 18:32

Boiling noodles was more effort than making a sandwich surely, so hardly lazy. Have you thought that maybe he just fancied noodles

whirlwindwallaby · 30/09/2020 18:33

If it was for the week and gone in one day then just don't buy more? My 14 year old might go out and buy chocolate (not in iso) occasionally, but I don't keep much rubbish food in. There is icecream where he might have a serving for breakfast after I leave for work and before school, but then he won't have any later, his choice to eat it then.

vanillandhoney · 30/09/2020 18:34

Why is mumsnet like this? I wish I hadn't posted. Who mentioned steamed veg? I was talking about a sandwich.

What's so healthy about a sandwich? I mean, they're only healthy if you fill them with healthy things. Cheese and ham with butter on white bread isn't healthy, but chicken, salad and vegetables on wholemeal would be, yet they both fulifil your vague "sandwich" criteria.

lazylinguist · 30/09/2020 18:35

Oh come on, OP. Plenty of adults have pretty poor control over their food choices and he's 14. Teenagers are notoriously lazy and lacking in impulse control. It's normal. He's temporarily at home with the freedom to choose what he eats. Yes, you've given a snapshot, which is why this is not something to get to stroppy about - it's a brief, temporary issue. A lighthearted "Oh at least eat a bit of fruit, and leave some snacks for the rest of us!" would be sufficient I think.

IamTomHanks · 30/09/2020 18:35

You're right OP. I highly suggest locking him in a room and feeding him kale through the cracks till he is suitably anorexic to be let out.

When that time comes give yourself a massive pat on the back.

DonLewis · 30/09/2020 18:35

I have a 15 yo. He wouldn't make a sandwich. Maybe some scrambled egg.

Left alone, self isolating, he'd probably have a couple of crumpets and a cookie.

You could always do what you normally do on a school day, either get him to make his normal packed lunch in the morning, or make it for him and leave it in his lunchbox in his room?

Original poster
losenotloose · 30/09/2020 18:38

You're right OP. I highly suggest locking him in a room and feeding him kale through the cracks till he is suitably anorexic to be let out. Right, so I have cookies, crisps and scotch eggs in the house but I'm clearly so obsessed with healthy eating my dc are going to become anorexic? Had mumsnet always been this mad?

OP posts:
JamieLeeCurtains · 30/09/2020 18:38

@losenotloose, would a sandwich involve always adding, say, tomatoes and green salad? On granary bread?

Original poster
losenotloose · 30/09/2020 18:40

I was just using a sandwich as an example. Bloody hell!

OP posts:
IHaveBrilloHair · 30/09/2020 18:40

Remove all of the unhealthy food from the house and then he can't eat it.
Actually, start a thread asking what foods are unhealthy snurk

Branleuse · 30/09/2020 18:41

my 13 year old is the same. Only eats crap if given the chance.
I often do stuff like make him a bowl of loads of different fruit for breakfast, and make him snacks of the veg he does like, such as raw carrots, cucumber, tomatoes and carrots with tomato sauce or hummous, and make sure he gets those in, and then try not to worry about the rest.
He also has school dinners and eats crap there too. Im fighting a losing battle,

Original poster
losenotloose · 30/09/2020 18:41

18:35DonLewis thank you for your normal response!

OP posts:
IamTomHanks · 30/09/2020 18:42

@losenotloose

You're right OP. I highly suggest locking him in a room and feeding him kale through the cracks till he is suitably anorexic to be let out. Right, so I have cookies, crisps and scotch eggs in the house but I'm clearly so obsessed with healthy eating my dc are going to become anorexic? Had mumsnet always been this mad?
I don't think Mumsnet is the mad one...
FubsyRambler · 30/09/2020 18:42

I think you’re making a good point, OP, but instead of getting irritated with MNetters, plan your next steps with DS. Including the clarity of telling him if he eats all the lunchbox treats, he gets to be turfed out into the wilderness to go and buy more.
Did that to DS a few times, a brisk trot to the supermarket burned off the calories and I ignored his wails about wolves and vampires waiting in the darkness.
It balances out eventually, but it is annoying.

Smallsteps88 · 30/09/2020 18:42

People really do have such bizarre and messed up ideas about and relationships with food.

Swipe left for the next trending thread