So what age did your DC first say they hated you?

[Helgathehairy]

Just turned 7 year old DD did for the first time today, which, to be honest I didn’t expect for a few more years!

My 13 year old tells me to eff off (with a little grin on his face) frequently, but neither the 15 or 13yo have told me they hate me. Am I doing something wrong?! 😂

It's not a given. Ours are 21 and 18 and have never said it and I don't think they ever would.

9
Dramatic flounces are just kids being kids.

DS is 3 he swings between saying "I'm not going to marry you anymore, Mummy." "I'm NOT your friend anymore." and "I hate you!!!" All accompanied by dramatic fall to the floor tantrum. I just step over him and say something along the lines of "And I love you too". He is fine again minutes later. Odd child.

About 6 I think. Not something they say often thankfully

When DS was 5 he brought me a piece of paper on which he had carefully and neatly written, “I hat yoo”.

He’s tried “you’re the worst mum ever” a couple of times, but as I tend to shout “trademark!” In response, he’s given that one up.

Ds 7 was a few weeks ago. Dd 11 not happened yet!

One of my dc from age 10, now at 13 says it most days.

My teen has never said it - I probably said it to my mum but I can't remember a specific instance, so there is still plenty of time for mine to use it!

You sound absolutely beaten down, @DDIJ. I’m sorry. Is there any chance of some outside help with it all?

My 4 year old tells me all the time... usually when I say no to something.

Neither have said it yet......

But 11yo dd did shout ‘Help ME’ over and over again in Tesco when she was 2.....I had to pick her up under my arm and she carried on screaming it until we left. Awkward.

Never.

DD8 has never said it. DS4 first said it age 3 but he's very emotional and goes for the jugular when he's upset I don't believe for a second that he means it and he always says sorry

My 7yo regularly tells me 'you're the worst Mummy ever!' When I make outrageous requests like suggesting he has some breakfast.

When DS was 5 he brought me a piece of paper on which he had carefully and neatly written, “I hat yoo”.

DD1 did something similar when she was very young. Except she signed it 'Luv DD1'.

It's completely normal for children to tell their parents they hate them, it's part of establishing their own identity separate from their parents. When mine tell me they hate me I always say 'that's completely normal, and I will always love you'. They still need to know your love is constant.

They haven’t even though I’m sure at times they’ve probably felt like they did.
They’re 16, 14 and 8.
None of them are very dramatic sort of children, I expect a lot of those whose kids say it are just in a dramatic heat of the moment. I’ve never told anyone I hate them. I don’t think I actually do hate anyone (that I know) although there are certainly some people I don’t like very much!

@DDIJ

No amount of help would make me a decent daughter.

I was referring to your situation with your children really.

My two year said the other day that 'mummy is all bad' the other day if that counts!

Never from DS but DSD said it plenty. Do not take it personally!

Count fosco, good strategy.

It's just so sad it's happened so early for me.

12, I think, and regularly since (whenever I make an unacceptable demand, generally ‘put your phone down’. Decreasing now after 2 years of it.

I think I was 11 first time i said it but I did hate my parent and am no contact now

My husband and I got a letter that contained a list of our crimes and ended with firing us as parents. He would have been ten ish.

Not as bad as what my sister got from her daughter. A drawing of her, complete with stink lines.