Our lollipop lady is a strange one, too. She’s a bundle of nervy paranoia, and insists all cars for a km have fully stopped before blowing her whistle. Anyone daring to put a foot over the kerb pre-whistle gets a right dressing down.
We veteran school parents provide a service for new kids and parents by putting out an arm to stop them crossing early and incurring her wrath.
Last year I suggested it to a lad in his early 20’s who was crossing early (like a normal person). He shrugged, looked at me with pity, and kept going. She had such a go at him at the halfway mark that he jumped a foot in the air, then scuttled off red-faced down the street. He was 6ft something, and big. She is 60 something, 4ft nothing and built like a frail sparrow.
The kids think she’s marvellous, and all say thankyou profusely. She kind of waggles an impatient hand at them and says ‘Yes, yes. Move along’ in a cross voice. Most of the little kids have a skewed view of her power, and often draw her when asked what they’d like to be when they grow up!
I saw her ‘off duty’ once, at a shopping centre far from her post. She was dressed to the nines with sky-high red heels and full makeup. I nearly dropped with shock. I’d never have guessed her private life was so glamorous (and somehow she looked very vulnerable?). Note to self not to judge.
It is a right strange job though.