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ADs deflower male cucumbers for the Greater Good. All phallic aubergines welcome .

983 replies

BogRollBOGOF · 14/08/2020 00:27

Because bitter male cucumbers don't bring joy, but phallic aubergines can raise an irreverent smile.

AD chat continues about life, the universe and everything. We know the answer is 42 but what is the question?
6x7?
How many roads must a man walk down?
How many unsadly reincarnations have PHE put into the database?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
28
AllPlayedOut · 21/08/2020 13:58

@Reedwarbler Try antihistamines if you haven't already. They can help.

justasking111 · 21/08/2020 13:59

Today I went back to our new Lidl made a pigs ear of it the first time but it will hereafter be known by this family as Lidrose. It is so posh food wise, clean spacious, parking a dream. The aisles of god knows what, clothes, tools, etc. I swerved past today successfully and enjoyed the food shopping. My SA friend begging me to buy SA wine so I obliged.

AllPlayedOut · 21/08/2020 13:59

Did the Dr prescribe you antiviral medication?

Reedwarbler · 21/08/2020 14:05

@AllPlayedOut yes thanks, I have got anti virals. I will check to see if I can take antihistamines - I'm already on a battery of pills for other conditions. Feel like I'm falling apart!

AllPlayedOut · 21/08/2020 14:06

Poor you. I hope that you get some relief soon.

countrygirl99 · 21/08/2020 14:09

@Reedwarbler I was on mat leave when that happened. All in the course of one ironing basket. DH came home and he had only heard about the first rate rise.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the z key on my laptop isn't working. I have had to think of multiple alternatives to size this morning and had to open another file to copy paste Leighton Buzzard. I think I might have to bite the bullet and call IT support.

RobinHobb · 21/08/2020 15:23

@CruCru
Excellent article
Very well written

InsaneInTheViralMembrane · 21/08/2020 15:44

@Dowser I think a google reverse image search would do it.

I thought the rock formations looked west coast but the colours east coast. So beats me! 😂

InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud · 21/08/2020 15:47

I present

Willy Tomato

ADs deflower male cucumbers for the Greater Good. All phallic aubergines welcome .
ADs deflower male cucumbers for the Greater Good. All phallic aubergines welcome .
InsaneInTheViralMembrane · 21/08/2020 15:53

My kids are loving the rude veg pics.

WouldBeGood · 21/08/2020 16:09

@InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud oh my! 😂😂

InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud · 21/08/2020 16:10

[quote WouldBeGood]@InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud oh my! 😂😂[/quote]
I thought it would cheer folk up

The greater good

Ibake · 21/08/2020 17:04

That's a sight to behold @InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud!

Taswama · 21/08/2020 17:35

Impressive tomato @InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud !

Agree about knock on effects to other people in the house. DP's company are now splitting people into A, B and C teams. A does 2 days in week one, and 3 days in week 2. B team do the opposite. C team do not have any office space at all. He would like to go in just once a week (and I would love him to!) but that doesn't seem to be an option with no space allocated for hot desking. So he is staying at home for the foreseeable as he doesn't want 3 days allocated and someone who needs to go in to miss out.

Dowser · 21/08/2020 17:56

@justasking111

I remember 16 per cent mortgages too 😱
I also remember that the house we were buying cost the same price as this car
£8k
and if this car had been bought brand new it would’ve been 2.5 times the cost of the house

DominaShantotto · 21/08/2020 17:58

Still trying to get sense from Uni about face masks in lectures... was assured I'd be updated this week - that's not happened.

Just replied to their "wooo we're keeping you safe" tweet asking about it - so I'll get masked warrior shamed pretty soon no doubt.

justasking111 · 21/08/2020 18:05

[quote Dowser]@InsaneInTheViralMembrane
Oh my lord
Look at this

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8650799/Boriss-Great-Escape-PM-flees-tent-moves-Old-School-House-remote-peninsula.html[/quote]
If my OH had dragged me up there with a baby we would have had words. Looks way too isolated for a first time mum.

TheOrchidKiller · 21/08/2020 18:41

My money's on Boris being far away from those photos. They're a decoy. I think he's gone to some- or all- of the places on the quarantine list because he knows he'll have the beaches to himself. He was booked for 2 weeks in Bournemouth but with a bank holiday weekend coming up & after the recent "flocking" he had second thoughts.

I have counted my blessings all through this that I don't have a baby or a toddler or a child at primary school, or one doing exams this year. I feel for all of you. But this week we've (mostly me, but I've made DH be more involved) dealt with the teenage end of parenting & covid, & it's not easy.

To be fair, they've both been pretty uncomplaining & responsible, & the eldest is legally an adult so we have less of a hold even though she lives with us. But they've started to resume their social lives, and I'm stressed. I want them to be out doing normal things for their age, meeting friends, having fun. But as well as the usual worries about what even fairly tame teens might be getting up to I know that they are probably not sticking to the social distancing & limiting who they meet.

There's been some threads this week where parents of teens have been slaughtered for suggesting they might let their kids out socialising in the middle of a pandemic. That the kids could spread covid & shut down an entire school when they go back, & no decent parent would ever allow that behaviour.

I feel very mixed about it & what to do for the best, & whether "the best" means "for the greater good" or for the mental health of my children. We've had lots of discussions about risk & responsible behaviour- whether that's about covid or alcohol or generally being a dick. We've always had rules and boundaries but parenting a teen seems to involve also letting them go. So we've let them go out.

Perhaps I am a terrible mother, but keeping them locked at home isn't an option. There's been a spate of teens meeting secretly in woods round here after their parents have gone to bed, which I think is far more dodgy.

I love & hate this stage of being a mum.

MagdaS · 21/08/2020 18:58

I got my T cell immunity test result today. It’s positive. That means I have almost certainly had it, and, although there are dire warnings about not changing your behaviour, am now probably immune to it.

TheOrchidKiller · 21/08/2020 19:01

Congratulations, MagdaS! The "don't change your behaviour" message always makes me wonder what they think people will do- rub up against other possessors of T-cells? Lick door handles?

Ibake · 21/08/2020 19:03

That's fab @MagdaS did they say where they're up to re wider availability of this testing? Could be a game changer

MagdaS · 21/08/2020 19:27

Those interested in the T cell stuff there is more detail on our other place.

SirSamuelVimesBlackboardMonito · 21/08/2020 20:06

Great news about the t cells Magda, it's fascinating stuff.

Finally got the info from dd's school. It's all sensible and non-d so far as I can tell from a first read. I'm so relieved.

MxEWeatherwax · 21/08/2020 20:54

Well I’m a bad mother because I let my year 11 DD go to a little garden party with her 5 friends to celebrate her GCSE’s. The friends parents stayed in house and only came out to light the fire pit so they could make s’mores. She had a lovely time.
Agree that all the unable to wear mask people are struck in house. The other day our local radio had a report about mask wearing and the feedback from the charities like Asthma UK was people are too scared to not wear a mask, so are staying home. Because other people can’t mind their own business.