DH 50th this weekend, and we invited my mum, siblings and husbands and their children and MIL and FIL - 17 people in total to BBQ to celebrate with DH.
Backstory - our family parties are always this size and have always been a bit of a nightmare as no-one offers to help at all. So we end up making endless cups of tea, cooking and serving food, picking up plates and glasses, refilling drinks on top of caring for our DC. We are so busy playing host we barely get time to talk to anyone, and when my DC were really small, it really stressed me out because no-one would even help with them if we were busy. Now my DC are a bit older, the parties have got a little easier, and I started borrowing an urn from work and saying to guests that they were welcome to make themselves tea etc to try to lessen our load. To be fair, we know what we are letting ourselves when we invite the family around, my SIL does offer to help and I have now started asking people to do things e.g. DSis can you serve deserts for me which all help.
Anyway on to my dilemma. Lovely BBQ last weekend, everyone started saying goodbyes and leaving. MIL and FIL were one of the last to go, and FIL asked if we wanted a hand to tidy up. I made some crack about "would make a change" or something like this, and MIL left in a huff. She absolutely is the type of woman to hold a grudge.
DH noticed that she was in a mood but he doesn't know that I suspect my comment set her off. How should I tackle this with her if she brings it up when we next speak - likely in the next few days over the phone? Normally I get on well with her, and I would hate to have come across as rude particularly as they are not the only relatives that don't lift a finger when they are round.