Daft as a brush, and other very British sayings

[GypsyRoseGarden]

Reading another thread, a poster mentioned “daft as a brush” which made me smile - it’s so very British - expressive but not vindictive

Another saying I like is “completely trollied” for so very drunk that they can’t walk straight

What are your favorite very British sayings ?

Like herding kittens = e. g. getting Reception children to line up.

That saying "you know what thought did, followed a muck-cart, thought it was a wedding" was used a few times on Coronation Street, in the early days.

You can always bend over and pick up nothing

Suggests new partner is a waste of space

@Thisfucker
My mum used to say that expression too
(From prescot ) and one I’ve never ever heard anyone say
‘ you shape like a hen with a tin arsehole ‘
if You couldn’t do something . I don’t know if she made that one up lol

And ‘ act soft and I’ll buy you a coal yard ‘
If you were happy to let someone else do something for you

Are these old Lancastrian sayings ?

@CaptainMyCaptain

Like herding kittens = e. g. getting Reception children to line up.

I thought we were the only school to use this phrase.

All fur coat and no knickers as a pp said is used these days to infer all show and no substance. Originally though, think it had a meaner origin. It's from the second world war and in Lancashire at least, where there were big numbers of US GIs based, it referred to a woman who was doing well for herself through dating a GI, so had chocolate, nylons, and such luxuries. It meant a woman had the flashier things in life cos she was shagging a yank. My Gran grew up on a farm with Land Girls and assured me that's what it meant in her day, it was quite the insult.

As a teenager, I used to mutter "living in this house is as difficult as lifting it". I didn't hear that one anywhere - I invented it myself.

@CaptainMyCaptain My year 1 teacher often used the threat "...or you'll find yourself in deep water. Hot."

@NetballHoop

Couldn't stop a pig in a ginnel.

Although it's origins are to do with having bandy legs from ricketts.

(Haven’t read the full thread yet but could let this pass me by!)

The first time I saw this - although it was pig in a passage - was in a Terry Pratchett book. I still laugh like a drain whenever I hear it! (Mostly about footballers and their bandy legs rather than rickets)

Bugger* that for a game of soldiers

*or other suitable swearwords