Never going to buy a house

[Juiceey]

Just that, really. I feel really sad about it.

Me and OH are in our mid thirties and forties and know it's realistically never going to happen for us. We live in Herts and pay a whopping £1500 a month for rent (for a 2 bed house >not envy) and simply can't afford to save for a deposit as well. On top of that we're in an expensive town anyway, a 2 bed house to buy is at least 400k.

It's sad, considering we both earn good money, to know we're in this position. I'm trying to stay positive about it- we're SUPER lucky after years of bad luck (moving every year thanks to landlords selling etc) to be in a secure lovely let- our house is owned by a charity, they will never sell or evict us, and is about 10 times nicer than anything we could ever dream of buying. It's just small but at least we can decorate as we wish and feel really happy here.

(We really can't move away somewhere cheaper. DC are at school, we live smack in the middle of both of our workplaces, I have a grandparent who relies on me etc, not to mention endless friends and family. We couldn't/wouldn't want to live away from our people)

So how do I get over the sadness?

I'm sorry. It's so shit for the young.
My sons are the same and will be at home for years at this rate.
Something will have to give , but I doubt prices will drop somehow. :(
It is unfair.

@Yetiyoga

Instead of looking in the short term, look long term. Where do you want to be in 10 years time? Even putting away £100 each a month over 10 years would be 24k. You could buy a house. This may seem ridiculous but I would rather that than stay renting to retirement.

I think people think buying a house is impossible and those that buy are lucky, but many people aren't lucky, i don't have family inheritance or loaded parents. I've just worked as many hours as possible and saved hard. I also live my life and try to do holidays etc.. too! (Often UK and cheaper ones)

I don't want to be picky, but what about inflation? Without crunching any numbers let's be honest in 2010 24k would have gone way longer than now.

• factor in brexit, the pound could plunge, prices will go up (it's pretty inevitable) so saving will be even harder.

I am open to any ideas though as we are in the same position, but we moved here 8 years ago with half a suitcase of clothes and a contract where on the first day I had to ask for money so I could eat.
Compared to that we're doing really good, but literally try not to think of retirement age.

I feel exactly the same! I am 28 and realised that it may be a fact i will never be able to buy a house. It is just the times we live in, which is so sad. Maybe you could find a cheaper rented house? In the same area? Then save the difference in the cost of rent?

@mywifeandkids1 yes it's very subjective. I thought around £30k per person was the median income in the UK, so I'd describe it as average.

Make sure you have a good pension. Most people with their own house will pay off the mortgage before retirement so no mortgage/rent to pay when retired. That’s a lot of money to find every month from a pension.

@TheSunIsStillShining of course inflation would come in to it. My point is to save what you can and see where it leads. Their income may not be as it is now in 10 years. I have worked multiple jobs over the last 5 years (my main job and then side jobs) because buying a house is a very important goal of mine. It isn't easy and I don't want to pretend it has been easy. I've still got another year to go. But I wanted it so I am making it happen. It will have been 6 years of saving up and working extra jobs where possible. Worth it to me. I guess it depends how much people want to save for a deposit. For me id rather not spend as much on other things that other people may deem important to them? It is about prioritising time / money.

I feel so sorry for people living down south. I'm a single parent in the east Midlands and I own my home and can afford it on my own. The cost of houses down south make my eyes water.

I wished that the government would just make house prices drop for everyone! It's a silly idea and will never ever happen of course not, but I often dream of a time that the government do something for young people rather than just exploit them or just hope they have well off parents to help them ( or an inheritance of some kind)
We could afford a place at 24 with normal jobs ! It's so unfair that today's generation haven't the same opportunities as we did to buy a house.
I find it really sad.

Hi @Juiceey

Yes I can understand why are feeling a bit deflated. But it sounds like you are very lucky to have a charity as your landlord - as you say it's very unlikely they will sell. You have the stability which is why a lot of people purchase a property. What I would say, is that there is a lot of flexibility and freedom to renting, that home owners don't have. You don't have to pay for a new roof, you don't have to fix a leaking shower (plumber can come round when you're at work!), you don't have to buy a boiler every 10-15 years. Renting does have its perks. Also, if you want to move (sounds like you should stay put) you don't have to worry about stamp duty, interest rates on mortgages going up, neighbour disputes etc. Would you have to pay for new carpets / new bathroom etc? Or does your landlord do that? when owning, that cost is obviously on top of mortgage, so renting definitely has perks!

I can totally understand why you would want to own, but I do think we become a bit obsessed with owning a property in the UK and forget about all the costs. A lot of people do it so they can leave money to their children - but then the government take 40%

Please don't be too hard on yourself.

But yeah.. it's bloody ridiculous what we have to go through to buy a house!!!!

[quote Yetiyoga]@TheSunIsStillShining of course inflation would come in to it. My point is to save what you can and see where it leads. Their income may not be as it is now in 10 years. I have worked multiple jobs over the last 5 years (my main job and then side jobs) because buying a house is a very important goal of mine. It isn't easy and I don't want to pretend it has been easy. I've still got another year to go. But I wanted it so I am making it happen. It will have been 6 years of saving up and working extra jobs where possible. Worth it to me. I guess it depends how much people want to save for a deposit. For me id rather not spend as much on other things that other people may deem important to them? It is about prioritising time / money.[/quote]
Can I ask how old are you?
I think there is a huge difference in priorities and possibilities when you are in 20s or mid-40.
We would love to prioritize home buying, just as you. But reality is:

• we'll get a pension of 800 pounds/month appr, so we need to save up to be able to amend that
• we have to spend loads on kid's education (personal choice, but still a factor, even though not big as he is on a generous bursary)

And in between renting, saving up extra for retirement, because we only have about 15 more years to go is pretty daunting.

I'm not whining to be fair, it's just a catch 22 in my eyes.

And I've just read our dear government's (the idiot bunch) new idea that over 40's should contribute towards their social care on later life through some extra tax. If it wasn't for school I don't think it's worth staying in this country :(

60k between two people is not what I would class as a good income in the south east. It night be around the national average but it is far below what you need to own your own property, even with substantial.help, and especially if you have multiple children.

your rent is very expensive. Is there nothing cheaper in the area?

Have you thought about part rent part buy? It might be worth doing that. Although you have to pay rent and a mortgage, you could have a lodger (tax free up to 7500 per year) in one room which would cover the rent part, then you're at least starting to pay off some mortgage (which you could get back in a chunk) and could save the rest. I know some people are loathed to live with others, but I look at it as compromising for the end result you want.

Also look up Mr Money Mustache blog and his videos on youtube about living frugally to save money. There are some great ideas and very inspiring to find ways to save etc. If you do a budget you might be surprised how much you can save. It does involve compromise but will be worth it!

@Whathewhatnow really? That’s 4K pcm Maybe I’m just broke then 🤣

@Mywifeandkids1 where do you live?? Am in Zone 6, commuting costs of 1.7k p/a, rent on a small 3 bed house here is £1700 pcm minimum. If you have before/after school childcare costs of £20 per child per working day and also try and run a car there ain't much left over at the end of the month....

I know I’m going a bit left field here but.... would you consider moving jobs and relocating to a cheaper area?

I live literally spitting distance from Birmingham city centre (7/8 miles)
It’s a 15 minute max train ride into the heart of the city and a nice three bed is £200k

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/find.html?searchType=SALE&locationIdentifier=POSTCODE%5E4164212&insId=1&radius=0.0&minPrice=&maxPrice=210000&minBedrooms=2&maxBedrooms=4&displayPropertyType=&maxDaysSinceAdded=&_includeSSTC=on&sortByPriceDescending=&primaryDisplayPropertyType=&secondaryDisplayPropertyType=&oldDisplayPropertyType=&oldPrimaryDisplayPropertyType=&newHome=&auction=false

@TheSunIsStillShining I'm 27 :)
Yes I guess our priorities are different of course. I just want a house more than anything so spent the years saving. It isn't for everyone. But i have friends who are my age who are now at the point of wanting a house now and totally regretting wasting their money on nothing.
And i would honestly say I've lived my life in my 20s. I had a blast at uni, partying a lot, a few abroad holidays since then. But i always had a job at uni. And now at 27, I have made this year to focus mainly on saving (which helped with covid tbh as wasn't spending much)
I hope it works out for you too :)

Could you move? My son bought a detached in Oxfordshire for about £300k and houses on the road where my mother grew up near Sunderland only cost £50k!

I moved 200 miles to be able to afford a house.

Tell me more about buying land and getting a pre fab house, is that a real thing?

Renting is soul destroying.

First time buyers have been shafted in this pandemic because the only mortgages available are 85% LTV. It is surely infuriating for those who have managed to save a deposit while renting, only to now be in the position where the deposit is no longer enough.

Who knows when 90% and 95% mortgages will come back onto the market???

Land with planning for a house in the south east may be marginally cheaper than a ready made house but not much. And staged mortgages are non-standard and harder to come by. Now, if you have a relative with a very large road-served garden they could gift you a chunk of....that might be different....

I love the just save brigade! Like we haven't already thought of that.
We've been scrimping and saving for years, finally this month we had enough for a 10% deposit towards a small 3 bed in our area (absolutely essential with two opposite sex preteens & wfh) but now you can't get a 90% mortgage and prices are rapidly going up.
So we've done the saving, we've done the moving over 200 miles to a cheaper area,
but the goalposts move quicker than we can keep up with.
It's utterly depressing.

@blibblibs have you looked at help to buy? It's what we've had to do as we have a small deposit but as it's a 75% LTV mortgage it's been relatively easy to obtain in this market. We can (most likely) remortgage before we start paying interest. Just something else to consider.

@Whathewhatnow ah yes london would swallow that whole. I’m in Kent

We are so lucky we got on the ladder early . I feel for you .