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Original poster

Does this sound fair re: school run

65 replies

gonesolo · 16/07/2020 18:15

My DD starts at secondary school in September and I am friends with a mum whose son also will be going there. She will be driving him there and I am thinking of asking her if she would be interested in taking my DD as well (we live close to each other). I would be happy to pay her. Do you think £1 each way would be fair? The school is just less than 1.5 miles away. She might not want the hassle but I thought I would ask her.

OP posts:
PippinMeriadoc · 16/07/2020 18:16

I think it’s fine as an occasional thing but asking her to do it daily is unfair unless you offer to take it in turns. What about if one of them starts an after school club?

catbellz · 16/07/2020 18:18

Can you not lift share between you? If she'll accept payment then that's fair but if not, and you don't offer to lift share to take on some of the work, it'll just breed resentment and your friendship will suffer. No matter how nice things start off like.

BaseDrops · 16/07/2020 18:22

£1? Are you serious? Are you also expecting your child to be chauffeured door to door at both ends of the day? It’s a huge commitment.

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chloworm · 16/07/2020 18:24

I would only ask for one way i.e. take not collect. For 5 one way journeys a week I would offer at least £10 per week. Collection will be too awkward with clubs etc.

TeenPlusTwenties · 16/07/2020 18:24

1.5 miles is what, a 30min walk or 10 min bike?
Is it unsafe for your DD to make her own way?

VimFuego101 · 16/07/2020 18:24

A pound a trip does not compensate for the annoyance of having to round up an extra child, check they have their stuff, communicate with you if their child is off sick, being tied to having to come straight home to drop off your child when there may be errands they want to run after school.

NerrSnerr · 16/07/2020 18:25

I think it's too much to ask everyday and will quickly become a burden. Can your daughter walk to school?

PickwickThePlockingDodo · 16/07/2020 18:25

How much would a bus cost, just for reference?

ILiveInSalemsLot · 16/07/2020 18:26

These arrangements can be tricky. What if the kids join clubs or they’re running late.
I have an arrangement with a friend for activities where one of us does the pick up and the other the drop off. Is that something you could offer?

PickwickThePlockingDodo · 16/07/2020 18:26

Mind you if it's less than 1.5 miles, can't she just walk?

missnevermind · 16/07/2020 18:26

It's OK to ask. Just make sure you tell her it's fine to say no. And if she says yes tell her she can change her mind at any time just tell you.
Don't offer her £1. Ask what can you pay or get her, offer her a bottle of wine on a Friday

Mumtumwobble · 16/07/2020 18:27

I wouldn’t want the commitment of taking someone else’s child to school everyday. Things crop up - appointments, illness etc.

Original poster
gonesolo · 16/07/2020 18:28

I was thinking of lift-sharing. I don't have a car right now but hope to get one sorted soon.

DD would walk to friend's house if she accepted.

I know it is a huge ask and if she didn't want to do it all the time it would be fine. I would hate for her to feel resentful hence i wanted to know how much money would be fair to give her for this.

OP posts:
BarefootHippieChick · 16/07/2020 18:28

My dc walk 30 minutes to school every day. Will she see other people she knows on the way she can walk with?

Murraygoldberg · 16/07/2020 18:29

Is there a reason why they are not walking? It's no distance. I wouldn't want to take someone everyday as would be too big a tie and would be a bit put out with being asked

Standardy · 16/07/2020 18:29

You could ask, I would say thought it would be reasonable to offer that DD would walk to their house rather than be picked up, and if she was late then that's her problem- also one way, probably in the morning rather than both ways is more likely be something to consider. I would do that for someone, but I wouldn't go out of my way to be honest aside from occasionally.

Mightymurphy · 16/07/2020 18:30

Yeah don’t do the £1 thing. That’s just poor. Ask what she would take and make sure she says something.

FilledSoda · 16/07/2020 18:30

£1 is worse than nothing tbh.
I wouldn't ask any all , it's a hassle for her and the school is so close anyway .

MsJaneAusten · 16/07/2020 18:31

Secondary school? 1.5 miles? They should both walk!

NerrSnerr · 16/07/2020 18:31

Why doesn't your daughter walk? Save all this hassle with lift sharing etc.

TinyGringotts · 16/07/2020 18:32

I really hate the idea of 'well you're going anyway so take my kid too'. The school run is time I want to chat to my child. Lift share is the only way to suggest this without looking like a dick.

xolotltezcatlopoca · 16/07/2020 18:32

I think it's too much to ask to take her everyday. If you have responsibility for others, it can cause some hassle.
I wouldn't ask.

SaucyTrout2k · 16/07/2020 18:32

I used to walk further than that to secondary school, could she just walk? I wouldn’t want to give another child a lift every day. It’s a big ask!

Original poster
gonesolo · 16/07/2020 18:33

She will walk once she has a bit more confidence.

OP posts:
labyrinthloafer · 16/07/2020 18:35

I think this is cheeky tbh, I would not agree to this as would mean I could not be spontaneous.

Also you are not supposed to go in others' cars yet!