In a hypothetical future when I live contentedly on my own ...

[Chicchicchicchiclana]

I will not have to put up with the following ...

sopping wet, not just slightly damp, bath mats

jars of things like tartare sauce that have been put back in the fridge when virtually empty so you don't know you need some more when you do your shopping list

pee on the toilet seat

everyone crowding into the kitchen at once when I've decided to start cooking

things that aren't recyclable being put into the recycling bin

Agree with all your points op.

I also would not have to put up with:

teaspoons being left on the worktop after making a cup of tea (instead of rinsing and putting it on the draining board or in the dishwasher)

Shoes being left randomly in the middle of the floor

Jumpers being left strewn on the furniture

No one replacing the toilet roll / toothpaste / mouthwash / washing up liquid (delete as appropriate) when the current one is empty

I could go on!

why are we so much better at these things than our fellow inmates hector?

No more teabag mounds that get added to until it is unfeasible to add more.
At this point you would think that the pile gets thrown away, no?
No, it becomes invisible to its maker/s and another mound is started instead.

I pretend it's also invisible to me, mutter "not my circus" and throw mine directly in the bin.

I also dream about being able to watch or listen to whatever I want without anyone feeling the need to pass a disparaging comment.

No piles of stuff waiting to be sorted.
The cushions staying where I put them on the sofa.
Eating what I want when I want.

Minecraft on the bloody telly

Be careful what you wish for.

The only reason you have these things in front of you is because you let them in.

Get a quiet and subtle grip.

I think not letting my children into the house would be frowned upon.

My favourite daydream!

No beard/ nose trimmings in the sink

No sticky jam/ honey jars without the lid put back on properly

No need to hide chocolate/ biscuits etc

All of the above 😆

everyone crowding into the kitchen at once when I've decided to start cooking

OMG this!!!

I went out for a long run tonight so I was out around 1hr 45mins then spent 20/30 mins getting showered and dressed when I got back.

DH had the house to himself THE WHOLE TIME but waited until I went into the kitchen to make myself something to eat to decide he wanted a cuppa and some snacks.

JUST WHY???!!!!