Do you like "nice" people?

[UltimateWednesday]

I'm not sure if it's them or me

I belong to a club with about 100 members, probably 60 that attend regularly (in normal times). I'm good friends with maybe a dozen and friendly with most.

However, I find the ones about whom people say things like "oh he's such a nice guy" or isn't "she lovely" get on my nerves, their niceness seems fake to me, no one's lovely and smiley all the time, but no one else seems to see it.

It doesn't matter, it's just an observation about my own response to people I'm perfectly pleasant and polite to everyone but I do seem to be the only one who doesn't seek out the company of the lovely people.

My MIL is what you'd consider 'nice'. She has an abundance of friends, is generous, community-orienrated etc, yet I avidly dislike her. Her my-life-is-so-wonderful-everyone-look-at-me social media presence is a total farce. I've been with the family for a few years now and I've never been made to feel more uncomfortable, disrespected, and excluded than I have around them. I never felt her kindness was genuine - it was saved for online communication and village friends who they've known for 30 odd years.

I like genuinely nice people. I think its an overused compliment or thrown around loosely. There aren't enough truly nice people.

I have been described as "nice". I have also been found "boring" and met people who assume all niceness is fake, but that's their problem.

The reason I object to the smiley ones is that it can make you feel a bit shit.
So for example, when we were in proper lockdown, it was much more cheering to me when I met someone who said ‘jeez having a bad day today,’ rather than the people who were all ‘we’re all good, thanks grin grin’.