A bottle of wine every day

[biscbek]

Been doing it for two years now. I don't even get drunk anymore . It's a habit . I work from home so it doesn't affect me driving or anything . No kids at home. Partner works away mostly .
Is it really bad ? Do others drink this much ? Don't really know why I'm posting . I don't even know if I want to stop

OP how does the thought of stopping make you feel? I never even entertained the idea of giving up alcohol until my GP said she thought I had a problem. I thought alcohol was the answer to my problem. But I was wrong!!
I was like you, drinking at least a bottle a day and tipping over into more. I was obsessed with how much was left in the fridge. If I went out for dinner I would be thinking the whole time about how much was in my glass, in the bottle, when was the next one coming.
I didn't get to a messy rock bottom like many sadly do but I did become aware that I wasn't in control of it any more, it was controlling me, and I was at the supermarket buying bottles of wine after work like it was Groundhog Day, every day the same.

Anyway, the good part of the story is that I stopped 3 years ago and haven't drunk since, with the help of AA. And it has been wonderful.

That’s a lot of alcohol OP. Not judging at all as it’s your life and no ones business, but it is excessive and about 5 times more than the average recommendation.

Could you drink some alcohol free beer or something to get the taste if alcohol but without the negatives?

OP how does the thought of stopping make you feel? I never even entertained the idea of giving up alcohol until my GP said she thought I had a problem. I thought alcohol was the answer to my problem. But I was wrong!!
I was like you, drinking at least a bottle a day and tipping over into more. I was obsessed with how much was left in the fridge. If I went out for dinner I would be thinking the whole time about how much was in my glass, in the bottle, when was the next one coming.
I didn't get to a messy rock bottom like many sadly do but I did become aware that I wasn't in control of it any more, it was controlling me, and I was at the supermarket buying bottles of wine after work like it was Groundhog Day, every day the same.

Anyway, the good part of the story is that I stopped 3 years ago and haven't drunk since, with the help of AA. And it has been wonderful.

I know someone drinking less over a similar period and they have done irreversible damage to their liver. I’m not saying the same will happen to you but i was surprised at how easily you can damage your liver and it not recover.
They are now completely sober and certainly didn’t have an issue with alcohol, it was just boredom and habit.
I wouldn’t take your health for granted and seek help now.
Some really good advice on here from other PP.

It's really not unusual - so many women, myself included, turn to wine in the evening to "relax" or "take the edge of the day" etc - but it is a lot - and if you're posting here, you already know it's a problem.

I've stopped (despite my moniker) for nearly a year now and feel so much better. I don't feel remotely deprived - rather liberated. I've lost around a stone (because yes, it is a horrendous amount of calories - plus all the extra eating that happens when you're drinking or hungover) but more than that - I have more time, I sleep well, I have more energy and my anxiety has gone. I also don't miss that nightly fight with the wine witch in my head that says "go on, just have one, you deserve it" - so utterly draining...

Take a look at One Year No Beer (OYNB) - it's a great organisation that helps you take a break from alcohol and redefine your relationship with alcohol. No AA victimhood or claiming that you have a disease. You sign up for a 28/90 or 365 day challenge - there are daily emails/ videos but the best part is a really really supportive FB forum. Really worth checking out. Also take a look at Kick the Drink Easily by Jason Vale which is great on busting the lies we tell ourselves around alcohol - and Alcohol Explained which is more scientific about the effect of alcohol on our bodies and minds. Good luck!

Both my parents are alcoholics/drink dependent . Growing up and seeing people drink alcohol was just 'the norm ' which I don't think has helped .

For a more harsh perspective - you are slowly killing yourself

My dad is an alcoholic, he can no longer physically drink alcohol and is in a dreadful state

It's not just your liver (which I am sure in the back of your mind you're thinking of the "fact" that it can repair itself)

It's every organ, every part of your body, it rots it from the inside out inc your brain.

My dad was an intelligent, articulate and capable man, he can now barely string a sentence together and is in constant and severe agony all day every day, even breathing or blinking hurts, which the strongest pain relief barely touches.

Is that how you want to be? I wouldn't want to be like that ever!

I actually wish I could send a video of him to you with his sallow, grey skin, unfocused eyes and shuffling agonising walk and permanently slurred speech.

I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Please please stop - with help and support from hcps as quitting without support is mostly unsuccessful.

@Graphista I'm so sorry for your situation.
My first marriage ended because he was an alcoholic and is in a similar situation to your father . You'd think I would learn from this but it's so hard 😔 x

Yes, 7 bottles of wine a week increases your risk significantly of female cancers, Weight gain, estrogen dominance, candida, congested skin, poor sleep (reduced REM which increases risk of other health issues), bloating, and anxiety.

I’d really recommend the book how to control alcohol by Alan Carr- it’s brilliant and will totally change the was you view alcohol.

I have plenty to be busy with but let’s face it; none of it is very scintillating. Work, cooking cleaning, ironing....and maybe a walk round the park? Woo-bloody-hoo.

Stop it @Nomorewineever, you’re making me want a glass of wine Seriously though, that sums up most people’s lives and it’s no wonder why it’s so easy to get on a slippery slope. The past 4 days I had 2x bottles of beer, the next night a glass of wine and double G&T, same again the next night and last night a double G&T and half a bottle of wine I now feel shit, no energy and generally low so I’m reigning it in until the weekend and then will only do Fri / Sat.

That’s heartbreaking, @Graphista. I’m so sorry.
My dad’s also an alcoholic - a bloody nightmare.

I’m just surprised at all the posters saying they have half a bottle at night, or 1 bottle lasts all day!

I could easily get through a bottle in an hour- 90 minutes. Not every night or even every 2nd but once I started I couldn’t stop, which is why I stopped completely.

Alcoholism comes in all shapes and sizes.

I'm sorry about your family and first marriage OP, I think counselling could help.
You will think about it if you think "I won't drink tonight " but you're thinking about drinking all the time anyway!
Please do something positive for yourself, you deserve to be mentally and physically well.

Habits are so hard to break. I agree with @wishing3 about setting yourself a time that you reach before having a drink. This helped me cut down too. I found it harder to cut out complete days but I literally took it one hour at a time until I achieved a day. Then try to take it from there, maybe every other day or whatever you feel is manageable

Could you start with one day off a week? Get yourself something nice to drink like a Coke Zero with some lime and ice or something, some nice juice you haven’t had before? I like those Cawston Press drinks. You could put it in a nice glass with ice, still make it feel like a treat. I know it sounds silly. I used to drink a bottle a night myself, I was lonely and depressed at the time. But I got fed up of never feeling fresh, and the health repercussions aren’t worth it.

I have plenty to be busy with but let’s face it; none of it is very scintillating. Work, cooking cleaning, ironing....and maybe a walk round the park? Woo-bloody-hoo

Yeah but the point is, drinking a lot doesn’t make those things suddenly fascinating, even if it does momentarily it doesn’t last longer than about an hour. Then you’ve got the same boredom PLUS weight gain, poor sleep, feeling like shit, bloated and anxious. I’d rather take just the boredom thanks!

It’s a really difficult thing to manage. Our lives are dominated by drinking and alcohol, it’s so normalised. Hope you find support if you feel you want it. To be honest I’m not sure any amount of threats and warnings really help you to stop, you’ve got to decide for yourself. Good luck.

My DH stopped drinking a few years ago and I’m so grateful he did. It changed both our lives, but definitely made his much much better.

It’s very easy to get stuck in the alcohol trap. It’s very easy to be in denial about it. I’ve recently read Alan Carr’s ‘the easy way for women to stop drinking’ after seeing it recommended on MN. I was sceptical all the way through the book but since finishing it I haven’t had or wanted to have a drink. It’s completely changed the way I view alcohol. I’ve already lost weight and look and feel so much better. I look forward to weekends filled with enjoyable activities and hobbies rather than a temporary feeling of being a bit drunk fri/sat/sun night, followed by the next day feeling grotty trying to convince myself my drinking was totally acceptable and normal. I just wish I’d realised earlier that quitting can be so easy and positive and the power is totally in my hands. (I know this sounds like some kind of advert but it’s genuinely been life changing for me).

It’s very easy to get stuck in the alcohol trap

Yep- the pitcher plant! Such a great analogy

Hello OP x just to say well done for posting and for being thoughtful about your drinking. You are battling a lot of normalising in your drinking habits - socially (if you're in UK), as well as in your family and relationships.

You answered yes to some questions earlier about patterns of drinking/thinking about drinking. I also wondered if you ever minimise/lie about your drinking.? Is there anything you've said here that is maybe not quite the whole picture?

@dontbitetheboobthatfeedsyou.. I think you could be me.

It can kill you. Alcohol killed my very intelligent Cambridge educated sister - she had a stroke.

I'm not going to drink tomorrow ,
Can I keep checking in on here ? Thanks for all your kind relies x

Maybe have a plan biscbek, make sure you have displacement activity, and alternative non alco drinks. Take a walk, phone a friend, tidy out the loft. Write down how you’re feeling. I’m glad you want to make a change.

OP, you may find you need some help getting to sleep, for the first few nights after you stop drinking. I would recommend an over the counter sleeping tablet called Sominex.

Are you on Reddit? There are a couple of subs on there that are full of support. r/stop drinking is a busy one.