Wolf whistling harmless or degrading

[CambsAlways]

Having a conversation with a couple of friends, both in thirties, we got talking about men wolf whistling etc, though it doesn’t happen quite so much now, both my friends had dif view one would welcome being whistled at, the other horrified and disgusted what do you all think

I find it insulting that a man is entitled to make a public comment on my appearance and whether he finds it attractive without any encouragement from me as to whether I might value his thoughts.

I feel no threat from the vast majority of men having never suffered serious sexual harassment or assault but appreciate for some women it is incredibly threatening to be on their own and have a man taking such an interest in their presence.

As such I think it should be considered sexual harassment and not just part of life as a woman (or girl as it started in my early teens)

@phonelock Maidstone was the worst place I've lived for it. Honestly couldn't leave the house without getting whistled, shouted at, or asked if I wanted to give the driver a blowjob. Not nearly so frequent when I moved to Cardiff, although the times it did happen where particularly unpleasant. Hasn't happened at all where I am now, but I normally have a child or husband with me.

Definitely didn't happen so often because I'm stunningly attractive, of that I am confident. It's just another example of men wanting to exert their power.

@houseforanartlover

At its best, it's a total stranger feeling entitled to pass comment on a woman's appearance which is part of a culture of patriarchy that is outdated and offensive. At its worst, it's used to intimidate, humiliate and control. So never acceptable IMO and i dread my preteen daughter having to deal with this kind of thing, as I have vivid recollections of whistles, noises and comments made to me when I was a teenage girl that were absolutely abhorrent.

This 100%

I don't like it. I used to feel embarrassed when I used to get wolf whistled at. I used to put my head down and scuttle past as fast as I could

Not so "harmless" when you're 14 being whistled at by a group of grown men.

I think it’s objectifying at best, and usually threatening and intended to be so.

To be fair it hasn’t happened to me much. I get ‘smile’ etc sometimes which I ignore with a stony face.

A little boy stopped me in the street last week to say his younger sister liked my skirt. That’s the kind of street interaction from strangers I enjoy!

I wonder how many of these men would be happy if their daughters were getting this unwanted attention?

If I ever see/hear one do this to my almost 12 year old DD in the next few years I will publicly tear them a new one. Loudly.

Why do so few women feel the need to do this to men?

It's embarrassing, happened to me once with my parents and I was only 14.

It's humiliating.

I think I saw a stat last year that said something like 8/10 school girls in uniform have had sexually explicit comments said to them by men.

How is that ok or harmless?

Degrading, humliating and intimidating. It is never intended as a compliment only as a way of objectifying a woman and making her uncomfortable.

Stop telling people to be offended or upset by stuff that doesn't offend or upset them!

This. If you’re offended by it, you’re offended by it. That’s fine.
But it’s also fine for me to not be offended by it.

I hate it, I always have, also catcalling gets right on my nerves.

Can you imagine if a woman did it to a man? They would be furious

[quote Babymamaroon]@Dilatory or a woman who is comfortable enough in her own skin, to not be perpetually offended by everything [/quote]
How passive aggressive of you

Never liked it, even when young.

Why should my self esteem depend on random male strangers?

Is it a compliment? I started getting wolf whistles from around the age of 11/12 onwards and I certainly was not attractive as a pre-teen/teenager. Quite the opposite in fact; I had greasy hair, greasy skin and was skinny and odd looking. Somehow I doubt all of those men found me attractive and I doubt they were all peadophiles...

Women aren't there to be gawped at and objectified and neither are men. Admire beauty but if it belongs to a stranger then keep quiet about it.

Exactly Bercows. No matter how 'hot' I thought a man was I wouldn't for one millisecond feel that he needed to know, from me, loudly, in public. I could not imagine in my wildest dreams think this would make anyone feel better about themselves! The mentally of the men who think otherwise or do it in a sarcastic way is beyond me.

@tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz

I think I saw a stat last year that said something like 8/10 school girls in uniform have had sexually explicit comments said to them by men.

How is that ok or harmless?

This is why I don't understand the whole 'it's a compliment' thing.

Also why is it nearly always men wolf whistling at women? Surely if it's a compliment then it would be more evenly split. I have never been wolf whistled at by a woman before .

It’s not a compliment. They don’t know you. It’s done to intimidate us. Funny how they never do it when you walk down the street with a man by your side.

Harmless towards girls in their school uniforms

Think about it for a second...

Making loud noises at members of the opposite sex who are strangers to you a compiment? More like a type of animal behaviour Attenborough would describe on one of his programmes...

compliment I mean!

When I was a girl at 15/16 is was scary and I hated walking past building sites - sometimes in my school uniform.

Now at 40 plus I would be amazed if any wolf whistled 🤣

It’s not a compliment. They don’t know you

That is absurd! You can give compliments to strangers. I do it.