What would you personally consider ‘man’s work’ (if any)

[Smyths]

Just curious really. I’m a bit of a feminist type and feel like I should be able to do everything a man can and be self sufficient but just means I feel hopeless when I realise I can’t. I often expect too much of myself beyond my capabilities.

What do you personally consider man’s work (if any) and would always delegate/ask a male in your family to do?

My DH is completely and utterly non practical. He does the bins and outdoor paintwork and deals with cat kill. That is literally all. But he is very very good at paying tradesmen. He also works in a male dominated job although less so than a generation ago.

This is not a cultural thing.
Note on this thread, how many women are describing their lack of interest in DIY. It’s not a coincidence

Of course it's not a coincidence - they self-selected as people who subscribe to the notion of gender stereotypes when they clicked on the thread!

Nothing.

I do delegate all the things I don't like doing though which ranges from bins to laundry.

He does some of the jobs traditionally thought of as 'male' - bins/mowing - but also does laundry, hoovering, making breakfast and lunch.

I do some of the traditionally 'female' jobs like dusting and cleaning the kitchen but also do all the finances and DIY.

@Mamette "For me it’s drilling into the exterior walls of our house. I can’t do it, they are made of some sort of double weight concrete and I don’t have the body weight/ strength to force the drill in."

You just need the right type of drill and drill bit. If it's that hard I'd say you're using the wrong one.

In our house Man's work includes hoovering, cleaning the bathroom, washing the pots, dusting, cleaning the kitchen, and sorting the recycling.

I do the woman's work of going out and being a bread winner, leaving hair in the plughole, jump starting cars, and managing the finances.

We joke that DH is my 1950s housewife 😂

These are certainly interesting questions.
It is undeniable that most men are stronger than most women, hence there is a tendency for jobs that require physical strength to be done by men. Nothing wrong with that.
Someone upthread said that in households without a man, the women manage everything fine. Do they? Really? Or do completely female households have a higher tendency to outsource some tasks to tradespeople - who are more likely to be men? The availability of power tools and the like has made it easier for women, and less strong men of course, to tackle some tasks that previously would have been impossible, but there are some jobs that still require you to hit stuff very hard with a hammer or similar, and they will remain things that are largely done by men.
I'm surprised to read that a number of people consider dealing with techy stuff and finances as men's work though. I can't think of any earthly reason why men would be more suited to any of that.
There are without doubt, still lots of roles that are considered "masculine" because they are more intellectually challenging, prestigious or better paid, and that is wholly unacceptable. Or is it the other way round at times? Traditionally female roles are devalued because they are associated with women?
I don't really like to see praise heaped upon women for taking on traditionally masculine roles. I find it pretty patronising to be praised for doing jobs that are traditionally done by men because it implies that women "better themselves" by being more like men. Putting a bit of flatpack furniture together probably isn't the pinnacle of my life's achievements but the fuss that certain people in my life made when they found I'd made a cupboard "all by myself" was ridiculous. I'd been to IKEA, not to pick up a Nobel prize.. And don't get me started on the attitude to traditionally female sports or I'll be here all night.
In a nutshell, I don't think sex equality means "women can do men's stuff" but all too often it is interpreted that way.

@Smartanimal

Heavy physical stuff such as mining, drilling and fixing roads, building scaffolding, working at oil rigs, breaking wild horses in, building roads and houses etc. Women would moan and faint in these jobs. Stop deluding yourselves that you could do these shitty jobs coz you couldn’t. You wouldn’t last a day you dainty damsels.

I’m a small woman and I’ve done a few of those jobs. The correct equipment and skills, along with health and safety requirements, means you no longer need brute force for most tasks.

See... what I do and what DP does are more or less along gender stereotypes (not completely)... but he has qualifications and a job that involves all the same skills as stuff like DIY and I did an English degree because I like books, lol.

Car stuff I ask my female friend who did mechanics, DIY that I do attempt and mess up (happens fairly often) I ask another female friend because she’s way more practical than me.

So it’s not man’s work, just work I’m not good at and my DP happens to have a skill set that compensates for that.

I do get annoyed sometimes that it does sort of match gender stereotypes... but it just does.

I am 78,and do most diy jobs in my house, all except electrical stuff. I have lived alone for a long time now, and just get on with things myself.
I am a bit miffed,that I don't like ladders these days though,when painting a ceiling, as scared of falling off one, and breaking my a hip or leg etc.
Having job satisfaction is good though, I have just finished putting some new flooring down in my kitchen, so never going to pay anyone to do things when I can do them myself.

Nothing, really. I have spent a lot of my life as a single parent, and I will have a go at most things if they are likely to take less than a couple of hours and don't require specialist skills/tools that I don't have. If they are big jobs, or need skills or tools more specialised than my reasonably comprehensive set of screwdrivers, electric drill etc, then I pay someone to come and do it for me.

My late DH and exDP weren't exactly DIY wizards either, so flatpack furniture assembly and putting up blinds and so on were generally my jobs even when there was a man in the house. Now-adult DS is dyspraxic and probably safer not being let loose with an electric drill.

Any work that I can to do

^ cba

When out and about I always ask dh to take our sons to the toilet (we have all sons and no daughters). That's mainly because I just want to go to the loo on my own though.

I think the thread is pretty feminist in that most people just play to their existing strengths to be more efficient - with whatever they have. Most people are saying that there aren’t any jobs that are men’s or women’s but in their house x has skills/physical attributes so does it. Perhaps it does make most long term sense for both to be all-rounders in case of sickness etc, but sometimes life seems too busy.

I do the spiders but DH does the tech (as he knows more - but is keen for me to take over when I get time to learn!).

In my Dad's and brothers' households (so what I grew up with), anything to do with cars, bins, DIY, getting up in the loft, changing lightbulbs falls to the men.

In my household I do all of that. Sometimes my DP will put the bins out but he always expects me to know which bin it is. I lived on my own for several years before meeting DP and my Dad made sure I knew how to do an oil/tyre change on the car and how to do general DIY. I always fix blocked drains and replumbed in the dishwasher. DP honestly wouldn't have a clue where to start as his parents never showed him anything like that.

DP only helps with heavy lifting if he thinks that he has an audience.

Plus 95% of the childrearing, cleaning, life admin and shopping falls to me just because he thinks that his job is so important that he shouldn't have to do any of it (don't get me started). I "only" work 3 days a week as we have disabled children.

Being the only woman in my family of Dad and brothers (who are protective of me) they have voiced that they're none too impressed that my DP doesn't do his share, particularly what they view as man's work and are itching to say something to him. It pissed me off that he doesn't pull his weight but I am more than capable of doing all those jobs. It would just be nice if he shared the load.

I am lucky that my 10 year old son steps up when he sees me struggling with heavy shopping bags and offers to help carry some or will do the dishwasher and has recently learnt to do a load of washing during lockdown. He's my little star and far more of a 'man' than his father.

It wouldn't enter my other half's head to offer to lift the ladder up.the stairs so that I can get in the loft. It only enters his head after I've done it, after he's heard me huffing and puffing as I've done so "you should have told me, I would have done that for you" (yes he would have but a week later than when I needed it) or if there was an audience. Similarly, it will be my little boy who will help with lifting things down from the loft because DP moans if he has to help with being handed more than one or two items from the loft because, you know, he's busy doing his important man job 24/7.

Yes, I know. There's alot of burning resentment but I have tried to get him to see my point of view and it is a waste of time even bothering now.

Sometimes, if I'm really feeling pissed off I will say "it's ok, I'll get my Dad/brother to come and help me". That usually spurs him in to action as he won't want them to think less of him.

Serving his family well. Understanding his place is not to lead the family but to serve the family

For actual jobs, if you're doing it hours on end day in day out, I think anyone will build the strength and the skill needed regardless of sex.

No hamster im talking from experience. Years, and years of experience and research. I wouldn't still be employed as an academic if I had a fixed ideology and let that influence my research. That's not how it works.

I'm not denying biology but you are massively undersestiming the influence of social constructs

I disagree that academics are ideology free. They should be but it is well observed (and studied ) that many academics become so entrenched in their own discipline and outputs that they become unable to see the bigger picture.

Your posts show you have become entrenched in the ideology that women are in the position that they are purely because of societal norms. You’ve completely convinced yourself of the blank slate, everything is ‘down to society’

I think there is a much bigger picture, your area of research explains much less than you posit. And the evidence around biological bases for many ‘cultural norms’ is compelling and overwhelming.

I realise that most feminists on here don’t like that argument. It’s uncomfortable and implies some form of determinism. I get that.

But that doesn’t make it not true.

Nothing. I'm the practical one in the house so all DIY/ garden stuff falls to me. DH is scared of spiders and has no dexterity. He is an excellent cook though!

Thanks for your appraisal of my work hamster. It's amazing how you've managed to evaluate and discredit my research without having actually read any of it. I'll be sure to pass it on to my line manager.

I'm not denying biology but as I've said, my research specifically focuses on career decisions. These are heavily influenced by societal norms, expectations and stereotypes. More so than biology.

For example, in a female dominated profession such as teaching you will still find more male senior leaders. You may want to explain that as biology ( women having children) but societal expectations etc play a big part both at home and in the workplace.

When considering biology isn't it interesting that biology is, more often than not, a barrier for women but an enabler for men. Your example earlier regarding the building trade demonstrates this.... the world is designed by men and therefore benefits men. I'd recommend reading the book 'invisible women'. It's fascinating.

While biology can explain physical attributes such as strength women do not choose jobs in the caring professions due to biology

They sure don’t do it for the money ....

I'm not denying biology but as I've said, my research specifically focuses on career decisions. These are heavily influenced by societal norms, expectations and stereotypes. More so than biology.

Ok, but there is a vast replicable body of research that says globally women are much more likely to have an interest in people, men in things.

And this has a biological base - it’s cross cultural

That explains some / a lot of the choices people make....what they are interested in

And it’s why the inequality paradox exists... the more freedom you give to people , the more they conform to ‘gender roles’ because that is what they are interested in

No mango they don't.
It's incredibly sad that female dominated professions are so devalued and poorly paid.