My cat's a dickhead

[DangerousMouse]

So today alone he has brought into the house a dead squirrel and half a pigeon, I've just had to break up a fight between him and a fox... he was winning, fox fur all over the road. I know it's what he's designed to do, but enough already!

Wow, your cat is hardcore!

Is he ginger?

No, not ginger, he's a tiny black and white lad. Currently laying on my bed washing the fox blood off himself

Foxes are evil so actually you cat was performing a civic duty, in fact he's a hero.

I saw a tiny tabby chase off a fox the other week, couldn't stop laughing. Fox was sprinting away panicked and this teeny cat was fuming

At least he's not as bad as my dog. Left him for a few hours today. First time he's been locked inside since lockdown started. Four pisses. Separate pisses. One up the sofa. AND ONE MASSIVE SLOPPY SHIT.

The little cunt is lying fast asleep in the conservatory while no amount of bleach will cover his piss smell.

Which is in the living room. Where we are all sitting.

Wake up to my other cat puking on my bed... jeez what is it with my cats at the moment! Dickhead Hunter Cat has just gone out without his bell on his collar, he'll probably bring home a dead horse or something now

All cats are dickheads, it's their thing.

A dead horse 😂😂😂

Mine is such a dick too 🤣🤣 brings me dead rats mice birds ...I tell him I'm ok but it never stops him

or the neighbours Sunday dinner that has been known!

At least your gifts are dead. 90% of the gifts my cat manages to bring though the cat flap are alive but maimed. Last week alone, rats, mice that run behind the bookshelves or cabinets and yesterday a starling that was bleeding but still able to fly resulting in a lounge that looked like a chain saw massacre had taken place.

My cat has brought home a sausage from the neighbour's bbq. And one of their very large pond-living fish. That was embarrassing.

I remember someone on MN talkubg about how they had one of those roomba hoovers which they programmed to come on at 3 in the morning. And said how fanatstic it was to come down every monring to a nice clean floor....... until one time when their labrador had diarrhoea in the night.........

Wake up to my other cat puking on my bed...

Was it the other half of the pigeon?

I had no sleep last night due to dickhead cat who is, shall we say, carrying a little extra lockdown weight and finding the cat flap a bit of a squeeze. So he prefers to use my bedroom window to come in. Obviously this requires him jumping onto my car in a way that makes me want to check for dents, climbing up the porch roof as the tiles cling on for dear life, then howling on the windowsill until I open it. Then, obviously he could go downstairs by himself to eat the food I know is there - but what if he got there and there was no food and he had to come back upstairs to get me to come down and feed him No, best to get me to go down first time round so I can show him the full food bowl that I knew was already there. Then, of course why use the cat flap next to the food bowl when you can come back upstairs and demand to be let out of my bedroom window? Except by then it was raining, so I was expected to open up all the windows with outside access so he could inspect them all for rain, listen to the whinging about how I should be able to stop the rain etc until he accepts it is raining everywhere and decides he'd rather not go out. And of course just as I've got back to sleep he then decides it must have stopped raining and we have to go back to window opening again, and then the food bowl inspection on his return.

Mine are indoor cats, they have never been interested in going out so rather than keep trying we decided to keep them in as felt if they weren't interested they wouldnt be safe. They are now 3.

The other night my eldest left his window open. One of the cats had obviously gone out of it and DH saw the other nosing around the window so shut it. The cat walked across the flat roof to the wall outside our kitchen window, looked at us sadly then went back up to the window crying so loudly till someone let him in. No idea why he bothered going out in the first place

@uncleshady I feel your pain, one of mine has got fat in lockdown, he was big anyway but I think he is pissed off we are in his house constantly so is eating and sleeping more. The other cat is skinnier so I reckon hes stealing his share too.

The vet has already said we should get a chopped food bowl but I have yet to find one we can work with a timer when we are out at work so I havent bothered.

Urgh, have been slagging my cat off to anyone who’ll listen this morning. He slept on my legs last night so I couldn’t turn over without performing a complicated manoeuvre, couldn’t have the window open as he tries to climb out and it’s a drop onto the driveway. He woke me up at 4.30, then 5.30, then threw up in the middle of DS’s bedroom. He’s a furry embuggerance and I’m heartily sick of him already today.