Maria had just gotten married, and being a traditional Italian
she was still a virgin. On her wedding night, staying at her
mother's house, she was very nervous. Her mother reassured her,
"Don't worry, Maria,Tony's a good man.
Go upstairs and he'll take care of you. Meanwhile, I'll be
making pasta."
So, uppa she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt
and exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs to her mother
and says, "Mama, Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest."
"Don't worry, Maria," says the mother, "all good men have hairy
chests. Go upstairs. He'll take good care of you."
So, uppa she went again. When she got up in the bedroom,
Tony took off his pants exposing his hairy legs.
Again, Maria ran downstairs to her mother.
"Mama, Mama, Tony took off his pants and he's got hairy legs!"
"Don't worry! All good men have hairy legs. Tony's a good man.
Go upstairs and he'll take good care of you."
So, uppa she went again. When she got there, Tony took off
his socks and on his left foot he was missing three toes.
When Maria saw this, she ran downstairs.
"Mama, Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half!"
Her mama said, "Stay here and stir the pasta..."