Anyone have their last baby at 41? Did you feel too old?

[40hello]

Can’t stop thinking I want another baby have been trying a while and it isn’t happening. Would be 41 by the time the baby was born, if I managed it.

Anyone else have their last baby at 41? Did you feel older?

We’re also about to move areas (one part of London for another) and am a bit worried all the other people with babies will be at least 10 years younger than me and I won’t feel like I belong!

Anyone?

yes I was a couple of weeks off my 42 birthday when she was born. It's fine - she's 8 now.

I also live in London and am not the oldest in her class - most mums are in the second half of their 40s.

That’s good to hear, Anna! How was the pregnancy etc?

I was 42. I love her more than the world, but wouldn’t choose to do it again at that age. Mainly for her.

If you have your kids at 30, they have you for a long time. At 42, you have less time left. I’d like to be around her and useful to her for as long as l can.

If she has children at 30, then I’ll be 72. I’d be ten years younger if I’d had her at 39. So would be more help and support for her. My mum at 72 was quite frail.

I meant 30 not 39🙄

I was 42 and a half when I had my first and last. I had a lovely, uneventful pregnancy, and I most probably am the oldest mother in dc’s class but I don’t care and I don’t think people really notice or know. Go for it.

Im 41 and currently having my first baby. I think it's become more normal as women have been working on careers to start families later. I had two miscarriages when I was younger but feel I'm in a far better place now to raise this little one.

I had my last baby when I was 41. She is now 8. I don't feel too old and most parents of children in her year are mid 30's to mid 40's. The only problem I had was that it was just so much harder to look after a baby at 41 than it was in my twenties! Now that was a shock.

Last dc at 43.2.
No harder /more tired.
He is nearly 6...
Age at the school gate is matterless to me - far too busy to care!

Six weeks off my 41st birthday, was an easy pregnancy apart from the nausea. Lots of my family have babies into their 40s so I'd grown up with it being normal.

I had DS at 41. My other two were both under 5 when he was born. I was a pretty average age, we live in a very middle class area in the north.

I'm not worrying about dying young, all my grandparents lived till their 90s and DM is showing no sign of slowing down in her mid 70s. DH's family are similarly long lived. Apparently there is a link between longevity and fertility in your 40s.

First at 42 - was not a problem, but then I’ve never known any different!

pregnancy was no harder @40hello but I had hyperemesis as I did in all of my pregnancies. Birth was easy.

It was harder dealing with the lack of sleep , but I was a single parent afterwards and had to look after my older children too and also she didn't sleep until she was 18 months old. I don't feel any tireder than I did with the others, and in fact have more energy.

Honestly, she's been an absolute joy and still is. We all adore her.

Not quite the same but I had my third and final baby at 39 and a bit. He's now 2 and I feel about 87

Bloody love him though so it's ok mostly

Apparently there is a link between longevity and fertility in your 40s that makes me feel pretty good! (Well, assuming I am fertile still! )

Haha Impatientwino - must admit, the lack of sleep right now would definitely age me more rapidly

Women have had babies in their forties and even fifties forever. Had my last at 43 and am exhausted... but may well have been if I was younger! Different benefits as an older mum and I certainly wasn't the oldest mum at the school gates in London (I am where I live now though... )

Yes I had my last at just shy of 42. He's just turned 9 and is Autistic so a bit of a handful but also a wonderful little boy who brings me joy every day!

My age has never been an issue. I don't feel out of place at the school gates even though I'm probably the oldest one there. I found the pregnancy and birth to be a lot easier than my first one (at 29!). I have a lot more patience and I'm a much better parent this time round I think! I've never felt too tired or that my age is against me. The worst part of it was my now ex-h leaving when DS was 2 and is barely involved with him now. It has been pretty tough as a single parent. However, we've muddled through! I wouldn't change a thing. Good luck OP!

My Grandma had my uncle at 44, she lived to 89 so this was a while ago! She was fine, a few raised eyebrows but nothing much and it's so much more common now for women to start family's later.

Of course the raised eyebrows could just have been surprise at the age gap between her kids rather than her age. It was a big gap!

Had my daughter at 46! Bit of an accidental baby but was pleased.

Didn’t really feel old. However I will be 60 when she’s 14 and I guess I will feel old. Can’t change things though.. She keeps me young and I plan to stay fit, healthy and active for as long as I can. I would have preferred not to be an older mum but that’s just the way it worked out!

I had my first at 41. Last at 43. Two teenage stepsons at the same time (one lived with us full time).
I had a strict bedtime routine and so do not remember much sleep deprivation after first two or three months. I found the adjustment from career woman to mother very hard, if you have kids already that wont be an issue.
In London I was one of the oldest mums, here 70 miles outside there are plenty my age.

I'm still TTC by 1st!!! Now age 42 and been TTC almost 10yrs and 3 losses. Yes, I would have liked things to work out years ago, but it hasn't so IF we ever do have a baby, I will be a geriatric mother!

I had my last baby two weeks before my 41st birthday. I didn't feel too old at the time but I definitely wouldn't have wanted another.

I've found a new batch of baby group friends with my last DC, but did have a slightly wobbly moment when I realised the youngest mum was closer in age to my eldest DS than me!
There is so much pot luck in things like ill health, being older does swing the odds one way, but it's certainly not the only factor.
I admit being totally biased as youngest is a joy, who has brought immense happiness (despite making life a bit more complicated).

Last one at nearly 44. Was an ‘older’ mum for all of mine. Not what I would have planned, but I was very lucky and pregnancies were fine. And I have more energy now than when I was younger. I was really quite slothful looking back. Still busy all the time, but it’s getting much easier. I am not even the eldest at the school gate! I too have read about the longevity study. Specifically, I read that you’re 4x more likely to live to 100 If you have a baby over 40. The study may need to be replicated! But I’ll take it. The idea was that you’re aging more slowly if you can carry a baby when you’re over 40. No regrets at all. Good luck to you.