What advice would you give your 20 year old self?

[turquoiseglanville]

Title says it all really - I'm 20 and would love to know what you'd advise yourself and/or me. Could be anything!

Chill out.
For the love of god, stop what you're doing and train in what you actually want to do, not what society and your parents look down on for not being a good enough career path Your 38yo self will thank you for it!!

Be confident.
Don't settle.
Work hard.
Make time for people.

Oh and make time for yourself.

Don't get into credit card or loan debt (student loans fair enough, but otherwise save and be wise with money).

Don't try and seek validation through relationships or hook-ups - a lot of the time, casual sex just makes your self esteem worse.

Try and get onto the property ladder as soon as you can. Find a career you enjoy because you'll be working for a very long time!

Change your degree course.

Get formally trained in something so you'll always have that to fall back on / develop.

Invest in a flat as soon as you can.

Wear factor 50, you’re going to get patchy pigmentation from sun damage in ten years

Enjoy your life more. Take advantage of every opportunity (including the chance of an Army Commission). Things will all be ok in the end.

Drop out of university, your degree will actually harm your jobsearch and the opportunity cost is obscene.

It's 1997 and houses will never be this cheap again. Did you know you can buy outright for like £2k in some places? Did I mention it will never be this cheap again? Also you have No Idea how expensive rents ars about to get.

Ok, you may have missed the boat with house prices... BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER SAVED A SINGLE PENNY. Save some money so that when opportunities do come up, you can take advantage.

Babies are great, but you don't have to get married. Btw the previous observation about house prices also applies to the availability of council houses.

That dotty old dude you were all (politely) heckling over at the European Affairs Society the other day, the one who just started some crackpot "UK Independence Party"? The future belongs to him and his ilk. Get out while you can.

Ditch the boyfriend and go to university.

And you're absolutely beautiful - you don't need to lose weight.

Don’t dismiss male admirers just because they are not that good looking. Look for kindness.

This, times 100!

More fun and less work might be a good idea.

Buy a house while a 3 bed semi still costs under £100k. 😕

Stay away from strong drink and strong drugs. Don't cut ties with your family. Don't expect your friends will be there for you always.

Don't settle down (I was married very young).

Go and see the world.

Meet new people, eat new foods, be kind.

Remember you'll be a different person at 30 than you are at 20 so think long and hard about who you want to spend time with and what you want to do with your life.

Don't treat life as a tick list or a race.

Enjoy your 20s!

Have a career that you can always financially support yourself. Never depend on a man for that . Save some money for the future , but enjoy life , travel when you are young. Don't take your health for granted , try not abuse your body. Your sexuality is precious , don't throw it away to indiscriminately. Always maintain your female friendships.

Don't worry about things so much, just get out and live your life as you want to.

Spend as much time with your Mum as you can - mine died in my 20's.

Think/plan long-term with your career. Don't wander from one job to another, think about what YOU want to do and go for it. I've been lazy at times and just do what DH thought best (because I was too lazy/dithery to make a decision). Make your own decisions or you may end up following someone else's dream, rather than your own.

Not that I'm unhappy in my 40's, just slightly annoyed with my younger self.

These ones about taking opportunities over boys make me sad for my 20 yo sister who is totally wrapped up in a crappy boyfriend who spends all day playing computer games. She could be having the time of her life and taking advantage of so many opportunities but instead she’s stuck in a dead end job in our home town.

Although I know at that age I’d never have listened to anyone older and wiser either

Don't forget you can do this and it will work out ok in the end however unlikely it seems. You will finish this degree and get the job that it leads to even though it feels impossible sometimes. Never give up. And definitely go to Romania. It will be an amazing summer.

Thanks everyone especially about the boys advice because I'm a bit boy crazy and feel like my whole life revolves around having a BF.

Raise your standards very high for a bf.
Better no bf than a shitty or inadequate one

That I should have gone with my instinct and picked neither bloke.

Believe in yourself

Buy any type of property as soon as possible even it was a 1 bed flat. I passed up buying a three bed semi in Nottingham at around 22k when I was 25. What a utter div I was back then!

contact the civil service with a view to careers.
note that they give you a higher grade for having 4 a-levels, more money and prospects than currently earning.
but will have to travel further to work. well worth the effort. good pension.
get out more and meet more people, find sources of support, encouragement. do not get stuck in a corner. do not buy all the food etc shopping for the family without some acknowledgement. ask that the freeloader also makes a contribution.
keep a diary. find out about how the world works, eg that you can have a deposit account as well as a current account. i had no idea. be bold to ask things, politely; don't worry about sounding foolish. be yourself. don't let people push you around. just say no and walk away.