If someone said your home was like a hotel would you be offended?

[MrsGrindah]

Someone who stayed with me recently ( pre lockdown) said it about my home when I was talking to them this week. I don’t think it was meant kindly either. I’m not unduly upset but I’m left wondering what that actually means, and what’s wrong with that?

I think she probably meant it’s a bit formal..I don’t do Knick knacks and cushions etc. But would you be miffed if someone described your house like that?

It is clean and modern. She definitely wasn’t commenting on my hostessing skills! But I think she meant soulless ..that hurt a bit cos there’s a lot of love in my home.

If they meant a premier inn type hotel l, I’d be miffed but a ritz style one, I’d be over the moon.

Yeah she wasn’t playing nice, that was a dig. I’d assume envy too. People do shit like that as a pp said to make themselves feel better.

If she wasn’t envious she’d have played nice and faked it even if she hated it. The fact she had a dig indicates to me she was envious so wanted to put you down to make herself feel better.

Take it as a positive op, she was jealous of your home.

She sounds mean! Fuck her!
And so rude to make those comments after your hospitality.
I like to keep my home quite simple and to what many people consider a bit too bare. I’ve been asked if I haven’t moved in yet because of how little stuff I keep. Made me feel self conscious. But it’s me who lives here so I keep it how I like. Stresses me out looking at too many colours and objects around me.

It may have been a bit snidey but I could only take it as a compliment. Not like she called it a shit hole!

By clean and modern do you mean empty of anything? I can't think of any house I've been in that I would describe as like a hotel, everyone has bits that make their home personal.

Anyway your decor/accessories aren't the problem, she is. Who is she? And why is she such a passive aggressive twat?

Now if your friend said it was like a Travelodge you should be really pissed off!!!

I live in an old listed building, We have spent a shit load of time, effort and money doing it up, literally blood sweat and tears, people always comment it’s lovely, but one friend said to me one night “it’s not just the house that’s lovely, it’s everything in it’

That’s a compliment and one that stuck with me because I could see she meant it, “I’m surprised at your place, it reminded me of a hotel” is not a compliment and was not intended to feel like one.

I’m sure your house is full of love! You don’t need wooden plaques and stickers on the wall to know your house is a home 🤣

God no, I'd be amazed and delighted! If I said it I'd mean it as a huge compliment.

I'd be pleased when I'm older and the children have left home I will buy a flat, have an enormous comfy bed and no knick knacks or stuff lying around. Bliss.

If your house looks as if all the furniture and decorations arrived on the back of the same lorry then it's definitely a dig.

Oh then who cares, she’s probably just trying to get one up on you given you say she’s PA. if it was that big of a deal she wouldn’t wait until now to say this!

I have a range of furniture..some new some old, clean white walls..few paintings, no Knick knacks, no cushions etc but fresh flowers. But it’s not pristine however there’s little sign of family clutter...we like to tidy stuff away.

Anyway , sod her I’m not changing the way I live.But like many of you have said I think it was a snidey remark.

Or post a few photos of your living room and we’ll give an opinion I love seeing other people’s homes..

My Dad had a dig about ours once, said it was like a show home and he wasn't being complimentary. He said there aren't any ornaments, it's constantly tidy and I hoover too much. Well, we don't like ornaments, I hoover once a day and yes it's bloody tidy, we do have neutral colours, what's wrong with that!!

Reading your updates, it definitely sounds a passive aggressive comment that says more about the person saying it that the person it was said to. Envy springs to mind too.

The fact the comment has “hooked” you & is rattling round your head is something worth getting to the bottom of if you can. I doubt it’s made you concerned about how your house is but maybe it’s made you realises that she treats you like this all the time?

Through my work I visit lots of homes. Many look the similar and it's the art, cushions and special objects that make them feel homely and show personality. It can otherwise be a bit like a visit to the room set ups in John Lewis! Nothing wrong with that, lots of people like it. It's your home, your comfort. Unkind of her to say anything.

@Zogtastic Yes I think you’ve hit the nail on the head there.

I like colours, cushions, books, pictures, a few knick-knacks that are meaningful (gifts and homemade things from DC etc) and don't feel as relaxed in minimalistic, neutral surroundings but I wouldn't dream of making the comment about hotels. Not nice. What's her house like?

Send her the bill!

At first I was feeling bad as I’ve said this that friends before when staying at their house! But having read the actual comment can see it was meant in a different way - in my case it was definitely a compliment along the lines of ‘your house is beautiful! I feel like I’m staying in a posh hotel.’

You admit your home it’s quite plain, so perhaps it is like a hotel - I don’t see that as insult, just stating how it is. If you don’t want it to be like a hotel why have it that way?

Your house sounds lovely! I wish mine was less cluttered and my family liked things tidy.

If I said like a hotel it would be a compliment. But you know her best. If not normally envious and rude put it down to a bad day. If she is frequently like this time for some distance.

I'd be pleased. No clutter. Clean, bright, modern and clean!