Experiences of racism

[nikkijr1990]

I've been following the BLM movement over the the last week or so. I live in a predominately white area (am white myself) . I obviously am aware of racism in the form of name calling etc but I really want to educate myself in some of the more underhand/ systematic forms of racism people experience that may go unnoticed to someone who hasn't had their eyes opened to it and just gain more understanding on the subject. Any experiences welcome

I'm reading 'The New Jim Crow' at the moment. It's enlightening, fascinating, and utterly fucking infuriating.

The book Natives: Race and Class by Akala is a good book to read.

Mixed (white passing)
"I didn't realise your dad was a full on paki"
"She's the exotic one"
"Who's your real mum?"
Man comes into the shop I work in and walks out 'nah it's just curry in here'
If I mention any other cuisine or culture people start saying 'is that a... personal connection to....' no I just like falafel.
I actually prefer the overt stuff. It's the being told that you're not allowed to wear your hair down at work/ being judged if you get angry/ being stereotyped as a bad kid at school which gets to you.
I still don't know how hard it must be to be black or Asian, or a non British national.
On a side note, the parents of the only black classmate of my dc's class told us they were leaving the school this week and wished us all the best. Two parents (I was one) wished them good luck. The previous post about a fucking woodwork class had sixteen different responses! Some white middle class people really need to look at their own social circles as well as posting the black squares.

I remember being a rather shy teenager in school uniform and standing on my own at a bus stop.

A black couple in 20s maybe were walking along and I noticed his very bright trainers. I kind of went into a daydream and was looking at his trainers but without really looking (if you see what i mean).

Anyway, she came marching to me and started shouting really close to my face that she was sick of white girls trying to get with black men and I wasnt attractive enough for a black man to ever notice me. I was really shaken up and upset and ive never forgotten that.

Years later and when I started dating my mixed race husband, i remember a couple of incidents where we would be walking along and I would get glared at for being white with a black man.

Ive also heard things said to my husband which have been said as 'banter '. He generally doesnt take offence other than when we were at a party having a conversation with a south African guy who let the 'n' word slip. He apologised but it was the fact he said it so casually that was so shocking

to add, i only mentioned fact was south african because he used a south africa term for the 'no word and my husband is from zimbabwe.
I didnt know the term until hubby told me

I look white so have had experienced far too many racist comments/remarks/banter for many many years from people who assume I'm white British. Even just in passing from someone fixing my car, someone quoting for work , new acquaintances. Such a quick way to root out which companies I will not give business to and which people I pretend not to see during social interaction. It has changed over the years too because it's often less blatant now and so can sometimes still shock me with regards to what someone just said leaving me sometimes wondering if someone realises what they just said. A recent example was on gransnet!

Thank you everyone for sharing your experiences! ! I genuinely am shocked at these stories. I will openly admit when I saw the protests etc that I thought we don't have the same problem with racism in the england then they do in America' it may not be as out in the open but this thread has certainly opened my eyes. It's made me feel rather silly and completely clueless. Thank you for opening my eyes!

@Squidgyflump, I worked with a woman who was quite firm that she was 'Rhodesian'. I get where you're coming from. (I had to talk hard and fast and very apologetically to get our cleaners to not walk out en masse after they took extremely understandable offence at the way she talked to them. And promise that I'd muzzle and tazer her to ensure she never spoke to them again. Revolting woman.)

I'm happy to be corrected but I think a big problem with racism in the U.K. is that it's moved on from the really overt stuff that's easily spotted and to something more insidious that's harder to call out and much easier to deny.

@nikkijr1990 how could you possibly know that there is racism in England. It is everywhere. I visited England for one month last year and I saw racism everywhere. One example: I got talking to an Indian man at a bus stop and he told me that he was told to"fuck off back to Pakistan every week"

*possibly not know

@Annamaria14 I didn't mean that we don't have racism in the uk . I just meant compared to America we don't have police killing people in the streets etc... and also I haven't been exposed to much racism out and about ! But it has opened my eyes to a much bigger picture of racism in this country and just because it's not so out there for all to see doesn't mean it's not there. Clearly you don't have to scratch much below the surface to see it x

@OutComeTheWolves I totally agree ! This is what I was wanting examples of . It's there in plain sight but it's very hard for someone who doesn't experience it to call it out or even in some situation spot it at all.

I’m Mediterranean, Been called Paki and Spic. Asked where I originally come from because London isn’t apparently the right answer.
Had a Saturday job in a bakers years ago where it was acceptable to ask not to be served by the brown girl.
I’m more of a yellow tone now, but tan very easily, it hasn’t stopped.

I've seen it a lot, some examples.. my childrens dad (black) came home from work one day and 30secs later the door goes and it's the police asking me if they could speak to the male that just entered the house. Asked them what it was about and when my ex got to the door they said there was a robbery in the town just now and a ladys bag was snatched. I questioned why they were at my door and they said they suspected him as he fits the description- the robber was black.

A few months ago my children were out playing and both came in crying, I asked what was wrong and a boy on the street had told them they had to play on the other side of the road as they were black.

My son was called a paki at school recently.

These are just a few, theres lots

@AvoidingRealHumans that is just horrific!

My bf is mixed race, dad white east end Londoner and mum from Caribbean, more than one friend asked me where he was from and when I replied London, they said no but where's he really from? Yes, he's from London. He's never been out of the UK in his life !

Myself and a workmate discussing a tv programme and she referred to one of the cast as half-caste, I responded with he's not half caste he's mixed race and explained why, slightly racist conversation ensues but I persevere until another workmate piped up with "I don't know why we can't just call them N...... never used to be a problem" these women are in their 40s, fortunately neither have children to pass their opinions on to 😡

@happinessischocolate I think that is the most scary part that people these outdated offensive views are ok to pass to their children !

I think when you are white but not English (for example Welsh/Irish) and experiencing this, it is different. Nobody will know you are Welsh/Irish by your skin tone. You are not more likely to be stopped and searched based solely on your appearance.

I am not saying it's OK to stereotype any group of people, or make "jokes" or abuse people based on their nationality. I just think it's a totally different experience, although both are horrible.

We absolutely do have police brutality on the streets. A black man I know of was shot 3 times by police as he cowered in a corner after being chased for 3 hours. Another died from asphyxiation outside a shop Whilst being restrained by police after the store suspected he had used forged money... sound familiar? There are many more if you research.
I was kicked and punched as an 11 yr old girl by an older teenager who called me a little black bitch.

My teacher flicked my curly hair and said can't you do something with this mess... I was 8 I cried in the classroom.

As a senior manager I am constantly considered the admin minute taker or cleaner by other senior professionals. I could share at least another 50 experiences
I tire of It, but thank you for asking.

I'm white but with an ex who was black seeing people walk out of their way in the park to ask him for rizla. Taking him to a party and loads of people approaching him to buy drugs.

Loads of stories from black friends about police harassment and wrongful arrest.

I live in a Jewish area but I’m fair skinned and blue eyed so I get a lot of anti Semitic comments shared to me by non Jews. Bizarrely I also hear some bigoted comments against non Jews from those in the Jewish community. There are racists in every community

I have never in my life judged or discriminated against anybody for any reason, whether it be appearance, religion, race, gender, nationality, whatever.

It's such a comfort reading this, to know that everybody in the world seems to hate my guts just because I happen to have been born white and English.

@Easterbrook your post is hilarious. Nice attempt at a derail. Lets hope this is the only response you get 😘