Madeleine McCann - new suspect

[KatherineJaneway]

A 43-year-old German prisoner who travelled around Portugal in a camper van is now the focus of Scotland Yard's investigation into the disappearance of Madeleine McCann.

[https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-52914016]

No surely it wasn’t commonplace to leave kids at that time- I think especially at the age, two one-year-olds and a three-year-old is very different to say an older child. I remember at the time most people were quite astonished two intelligent people would make that decision. But as others have said they’ve paid the ultimate price and no doubt regret that decision every day.

I also think that in a situation like you describe NietzschePeachPearPlum, it takes a brave person to stand up in a hairdressers full of people, after a child has been abducted, and happily admit to leaving their child alone. I haven’t ever done it, but my mum has said to me a few times, why can’t you just walk down to the corner shop for the milk (top of my road), why do you have to wait for her to wake up. People do. They aren’t going to shout loudly about it now though.

It was common, that's why listening services existed. The service wouldn't have been running if there was no use for it.

So when this thread disappears, and it will, in fact I’m amazed it’s still here, will people complain that they weren’t able to discuss MMC in light of recent developments?

Because let’s be honest this has moved beyond discussion of what is actually in the news right now into the realms of playing a blame game and offering personal judgements as to whether KM had difficulties conceiving and whether Gerry had shifty looking eyes.

Seriously.

Yes, but @SisterAgatha no one would need to be “brave” in that situation if it were a question of doing something common and acceptable, would they?

The thread got derailed by the haters. It's not a time for this now our thoughts should just be for the family. End of.

When I was little, our next door neighbours would ask the people living each side of them to have a drink on New Year's Eve. Nobody could get a babysitter on that night, so my parents and the friends on the other side all spent the evening together, taking it in turns to pop next door each hour and check on the sleeping kids. Looking back, it was not great, but actually quite common if you were "only next door ". Things are very different now.

@NietzschePeachPearPlum

I completely disagree with the assertion that it was common to leave children unattended at that time. I had my first DC in 1991 (and last in 2008) and would never have dreamt of it. Nor did anyone else I know leave ever their children.

I heard about MM in the hairdressers. Hairdresser and I both also had little girls. She was early 20s, I was late 30s and there were some older ladies in the salon, too. Every one of us, mothers of all ages, couldn’t believe the children had been left unattended. It’s never been acceptable.

That said, I feel so sorry for the McCanns and hope this new development brings some answers for them.

And I disagree with your disagreement.

I had young children at the time and went on more that one holiday, admittedly in the UK, where it was absolutely common to leave children in the room either with the hotel reception listening in or for the parents to take turns in popping back to the room to check.

The most you can say is that you weren't aware of it but it was something that people did, amongst my circle it was acceptable

The German police seem to be coming across as quite certain to having their man. I don't believe Germans would be so flippant as to be so open in the media if they were not sure. We will see in the next few days. If they solve this case we should be really embarrassed. We have spent 12m on this and got nowhere and they will seem to have sorted this out quite easily. I know he is German, but this guy slipped through the Portuguese and British net a few times.

Well they do need to be brave in the face of the worst possible outcome. If the story was “I left my child in the hotel room and had a lovely uninterrupted tapas dinner” no one would need to condemn or justify it at all.

It doesn’t really matter what any of us would do anyway. The McCanns did it. And were the victims of a crime. The rest is just a distraction from that really.

I just can’t stand the sanctimonious ‘I would never have left my children unattended’ comments, as if these paragons of parental perfection are skilfully preventing any sort of risk in life because they have superior judgement to others.

Have some compassion for god’s sake and if you can’t stop criticising people you’ve never met and know nothing about then keep your mouth shut. We don’t all need to hear your nasty toxic opinions about whether or not a mother and father caused their little daughter to be abducted and possibly violently murdered

I'm not sure that leaving kids in such circumstances has ever been commonplace.

Listening services-but a more secure site overall iyswim?

@Casino218

Your comment about personality disorders was discriminatory, ableist and says a lot about you as a human being.

It’s great that you are 100% certain it’s not the parents (my gut feeling is that it wasn’t them but that’s incidental) you should let the police know of your confidences, maybe you can help!

I heard about MM in the hairdressers. Hairdresser and I both also had little girls. She was early 20s, I was late 30s and there were some older ladies in the salon, too. Every one of us, mothers of all ages, couldn’t believe the children had been left unattended. It’s never been acceptable.

Impressive. Must be true then Super field study!

The thread got derailed by the haters. It's not a time for this now our thoughts should just be for the family.

Yes, the mob is out in full force. "I'd never have left my child bla bla bla".

Well, the McCanns obviously did leave their children. They misjudged it badly, maybe due to peer pressure or maybe because they felt that it was safe enough in the circumstances, or maybe they just didn't think it through properly. I would have thought that they must have been pretty sleep deprived with 3 children under 4 and both of them working in busy and pressured careers.

They made a big mistake and have lost their child as a result. Do people have no empathy? Clearly not.

It's a "burn the witch" kind of mentality. Plus ça change.

@Haenow Hit a nerve have I? Given your empathy towards grieving parents I don't value your views.

@Port1aCastis

Didn’t Kate McCann have difficulty conceiving?

What a foul comment and it is none of your business none at all!

Why is that a foul comment?

Surely if you have had difficulty conceiving, then the children you do manage to have will be even more precious to you?

I am not a hater. I just can’t understand the parents actions on that holiday. If they had wanted an adults only piss up sort of holiday, why not leave the kids with their Grandparents? They seem to have spent very little time on that holiday with any of their kids.

As for it not being any of my business. The McCann’s themselves chose to drag all of the rest of us into their business.

Looks this thraed isn't about them leaving their kids, it sounds like the Police believe they finally know what happened and now need the proof to back it up. Let's focus on that or this thread will be pulled.

@egfd2557

I just can’t stand the sanctimonious ‘I would never have left my children unattended’ comments, as if these paragons of parental perfection are skilfully preventing any sort of risk in life because they have superior judgement to others.

Have some compassion for god’s sake and if you can’t stop criticising people you’ve never met and know nothing about then keep your mouth shut. We don’t all need to hear your nasty toxic opinions about whether or not a mother and father caused their little daughter to be abducted and possibly violently murdered

It's not sanctimonious at all. It's just a fact. I haven't ever done it. I wouldn't ever do it. Yes things were different then.

I'm absolutely not perfect and I can't prevent all risk but it doesn't take a genius to realise that situation was dangerous even if you take intruders out of the situation entirely.

I don't have superior judgement at all I just wouldn't have made the decision they did. Many others wouldn't.

It's not a toxic opinion to say that leaving 3 small children in an apartment no matter how common was foolish.

However I don't believe they caused her abduction. The only person who caused that was the person who did it.

I have a lot of compassion for anyone who's lost a child. I imagine they hate themselves for it.

I hope they get some closure. I hope her siblings get closure too.

@Casino218

I’m cringing for you and your ableist attitude.

Show me where I’ve demonstrated any lack of empathy or criticised her parents.

You’ve not hit a nerve, I actually defended her parents up thread, if you bothered to read.

Surely if you have had difficulty conceiving, then the children you do manage to have will be even more precious to you?

It took me two months. But are you really going to tell me my child is less precious because I conceived relatively quickly?

Really?

I’m confused by the poster who asserted upthread that the twin siblings ‘live life fully’ and no one is allowed to mention MM to them.

Quite apart from how the hell you police that among teenage kids (I know the McCanns are highly litigious but c’mon, you can’t legislate against people talking facts!) it seems odd because I know I’ve seen in interviews that they made a point of talking about MM and keeping her bedroom, leaving birthday presents etc.

I hope to god this wasn’t something they did when the twins were younger but then decided it was better to ignore her existence. Goodness only knows what it’s done to the twins psychologically anyway, it doesn’t bear thinking about, but I’m sure it’s way more messed up to try to erase a sibling from ever having existed

@Casino218

I made not a single trolling comment nor have I been negative about the McCanns’s, in fact, quite the opposite. I have no idea what your problem is but MNHQ agreed and deleted that part of your post.
Report me if you think I’ve said something nasty and trolling. Please quote me and show me too and I’ll apologise if I inadvertently was unpleasant about Madeleine, her family or her parents.

I don't particularly like the McCanns, mostly for their poor decision making. Also the arrogance of Gerry. He always acted as though he had a bad smell under his nose.

Jesus F Christ.

Let's be honest though, he does doesn't he. All this crappy perfect parents spiting their shit about them on the internet and how they look shifty and she had her hand down. Stinks really.

'Hair done' not 'hand down'

This stuff stinks. Little wonder if he looks like there's a bad smell.

Honestly who gives a fuck about who would or wouldn't leave their kids where and when. It's ridiculous and adds nothing. Like a rosary or a mantra to keep your self safe. If you say it often enough nothing bad will happen to you.