Does life really begin at 40?

[Vintagehearts]

Or so the saying goes..

I'm a few short years off of approaching 40 so just for fun, I'm intrigued about this saying?

If life begins at 40, how so and did it begin for you?

I'll let you know in a few weeks

Seriously though, what is it you are wanting from life that hasn't happened yet? What are you unhappy with? What are you waiting for?

I suppose in a way it did.

I moved a considerable distance when was in my very late 30s to be with my then DP. We got engaged when I was 39, got married at 40, had DD at 41.

Nah.

I've just turned 40. Life is good but I wouldn't say it has 'begun'. I can see a next phase coming in about five years or so as out children become independent.

I hope so. I'll be 40 next year and am desperate for more excitement and adventure in my life. Feel like I'll go insane if things in my life don't take a turn soon.

Living life giving fewer fucks definitely begins at 40!!!

Why is that DD?

I'm 29 so a way off. But I expect life will change big time when I turn 40 as DS will turn 18 the same year and may go off to university.

I'm 47 and my forties have been way better than my 30s!

Yes that's my view. At around 45 I'll become a (youngish) adult with adult children and surely that's when my 'next stage' begins. I've just been out with my children and they are great company :) looking forward to getting to know them as young adults.

Emotionally and personally, yes.

Career-wise - nope. Am completely done with my chosen career (teaching) and have no idea where to turn next at the age of 46.

Life satisfaction in the UK is lowest around 50, rising again until 70. I'm 51, I've had teenager issues, parents issues, health issues, I've given up a lot of my own plans for other people, it's pretty crap. I'm starting to feel younger people think I am irrelevant and stupid and getting the rage that they don't appreciate what our generation fought for. I'm realising my pension provision is pathetic and desperately saving. But I mostly feel much more confident in myself. I think it very much depends on your situation, if none of the crap stuff happens it can be great!

When I'm 40 my dc will be 16 and 18 so maybe the saying is more about that; you're life begins when your dc grow up. The saying is from the days where it was common from women to have their children in their early- mid 20s, so they are grown by 40 and hence the saying?

Tabby when you say "what our generation fought for," what do you mean?

Career wise yes, I got promoted.

Health wise, hell no. I developed a condition (TN) and had to have a hip operation.

I mean lesbian and gay rights, rights for women, anti-racist stuff, better employment conditions, more flexible working, environmentalism etc. - lots of younger people seem to think those sort of things only started recently.

No, life continues at 40! It's just an age like any other. I'm 48. Nothing magically good or magically bad happened when I turned 40. Like many people, I find it quite liberating to know myself better and be less bothered what others think of me as I get older, but that's a gradual thing, not specific to turning 40.

Tabby I think that's quite common in most generations as in the younger ones don't appreciate what the generations before went through so they could enjoy more freedom etc...

I think life begins when your children are old enough to leave home. I am 55 and still have one last one left at school. This time next year, I really hope life is going to begin for me.

Oh, and not to put a dampener on proceedings, but I found my 40s quite a difficult time

When I'm 40 my kids will be 25, 22, 20 and 18 so I imagine I will be having all sorts of fun by then 😂

Each decade has good bits and bad bits.
For me 40 meant new friends as we moved for a school and met an amazing group of lovely people. This led to a better social life than we’d had in a while.

However physically things have started to hurt a bit, not recovering from injuries quickly, beginnings of insomnia and acid reflux etc.

I turned 40 1 week before lock down.

At the age of 39 I’d finally got a job I was proud of.

I’d spend my twenties and early thirties looking after my DC and ill relatives alongside a part time job I enjoyed but wasn’t going anywhere. I finally took the plunge in to a new full time job and in that first year I was doing brilliantly, I’d been promoted and was just about to receive another pay rise so I booked my first ever holiday abroad.

Then Coronavirus.

My job is unlikely to exist after the end of June as the company have struggled to stay afloat and have warned of extreme measures to cut jobs.

So no job, no holiday and that perfect career I was hoping for has been ended.

and I’ve put on 10lbs of lockdown weight

So no, not for me, so far 40 has been fucking shit! 🙈

I think the saying comes from a time when your kids were generally becoming independent around the time you turn 40, so you kind of get new lease of life, and usually you're more financially secure than you were before you had kids. So you have more time and money to enjoy life.

It's probably more like 45 now since on average we're having kids later these days.

Tabby I think that's quite common in most generations as in the younger ones don't appreciate what the generations before went through so they could enjoy more freedom etc...

I don't know, I feel that we had much more of a connection to 1960s/70s feminists than there is between Gen Xers and millennials. I wonder whether that's because there was a richer written history, we still had feminist magazines as well as possibly read more books rather than social media, but also there were more places for women to meet - women's centres open to all, lesbian bars, and lesbian and gay centres that don't exist in the same way now. Although it may also be because a lot of this imploded in the 90s and there's been a bit of a gap in activity.