Does life really begin at 40?

[Vintagehearts]

Or so the saying goes..

I'm a few short years off of approaching 40 so just for fun, I'm intrigued about this saying?

If life begins at 40, how so and did it begin for you?

I think life begins when your children are old enough to leave home
I disagree with this. It sounds like such a wasted life, especially if people are,I general having children later.
I think every decade has sopportunties and challenges.
I too am 55 but if I waited for fun and excitement to begin when my youngest left home I would be putting everything on hold!

I think life begins when your children are old enough to leave home

Lord no! I had my first at 22 and I’m pregnant again at 40 - if that was the case, I’d never have had a life from 22 to almost 60!

I hope so as there ain't much happening now at 39

I had DCs in my early 30s so while they are still children, they are less needy than they were and their independence will increase. During my 40s, I will get to the point that DH and I will be able to do radical things like going to the cinema together without paying the other arm and leg for a babysitter and having to plan yonks in advance.

I think @Couch25K articulated well how I feel in my 40's, it's 'contentment'. I got married at 21 and then I feel like we spent all my 20's and 30's striving to achieve the life we have now.
We moved countries on expat contracts several times, with an end of goal to live permanently where we are now, building up savings on the way so that we could have the quality of life we wanted.
I was in my very early 40's when it really hit me how contented and happy I was. We have a happy marriage, a healthy, happy teenager and feel like our futures are secure in a country we love.
So I guess that I finally feel the pressure is now off to keep pushing forward, and now I'm in my 40's I can relax and enjoy what I have.

I had a newborn at 40 so life changed. It didn't begin.

30's were good, 40's a cycle of rubbish, now 52 and feel a fresh new start coming along.

I'm 47 and my forties have been amazing so far, lost my best friend two years ago when she was 46 and decided to live my life to the full, left my 20 year marriage and have a new career, and I'm having fun!!!

It did for me! My youngest was 10 and I started on a totally different career path at 40.
With both DH and I working in well paid jobs, we could at last take DC on foreign holidays, go out for meals together etc
My confidence grew and life was good, still is.
We were not too stretched when supporting DC through uni, wedding, house deposits etc.
That change meant we could both retire at 60 (18 months ago) and although not rich by any means we enjoy life. We do lots of voluntary work and help out with grandchildren in school holidays - up until covid of course!

It totally did for me. I left a job where I’d been for 15 years and took the plunge into a different but related field. Best decision ever. I have my dream job now, I love it, it pays well, quite flexible, good colleagues.

I joined a gym. Lost weight and got fit. Made 3 amazing friends. Dd was 16yo when I turned 40 so think it coincided with her being more independent and me having more time.

DS will turn 13 when I am 40 so I am hoping to have more time. I am 31 now and already caring a lot less what others think and am embracing hobbies. Hope to do quite a bit of travelling with a teenage DS too :)

I don't think so to be honest. I had a lot more fun in my teens, 20s and 30s. I'm now 45 and always knackered.

For me it all came at both sides . Had 2nd dc just before 40 , lost a parent at the same time and have ended up caring for elderly parent with dementia which is still on going . Career fell off a cliff. Trying to claw back professional career now youngest 7 and eldest just starting secondary . Anticipate elderly parent is not far off residential care . I am determined that my 50’s which are still a little way off are on an even keel with fewer responsibilities will be the trade off I hope . It’s been unbelievably hard juggling it all with no family bar husband to help . So so tired . Coronavirus has just made the impossible even harder. Watching a relative decline does depress you and make you fear for your own health .

I agree with you OP DC are more independent and will be leaving the nest soon.

I am finally comfortable off and content and confident.

I didn't miss out on anything 😂 how many years do you need getting pissed, partying, travelling, before it's just boring.

I'm GenX so was out at pubs, raves, clubs, gigs and festivals from 15/16. I tried out different careers and courses. bought a house at 19. Travelled around a bit met DH, and had DC1 at 23.

life had thrown us curve balls and we've lived on a shoe string for a quite a few years. But I still had a life, friends and fun.

40s now just feels so settled (fingers crossed) kids are out the way, money ok, lots of time for DH me.

It is a new chapter with less responsibility.

I never wanted to hold off having kids as I'd seen my mother and her friends make fantastic careers for themselves towards their late 30s, with no little children to worry about any more.

But even at that time in my 20s, there was a general feeling in society that us women should get the career first and wait a while before DC.

Can I ask the PPs who started a new career in their forties what they do?

I’m at the point of needing a change and I just don’t know what I’ll do. I need ideas.

Yes, I have only been 40 for a few months but in that time I have had a baby, bought a convertable and am in the middle of a house extension that has been planned for the last 10 years. A wierd combination of a mid life crisis and finally growing up!

@LunaNorth. I’m now a university lecturer.

Il be done having children by the time I'm 30 so I bloody hope so as I've given up my youth to parenting lol

@JacobReesMogadishu thank you. Do you like it?

I love it. Love teaching the students. And it’s a really interesting job.

Maybe the saying is out of date... I mean people have children at all different ages now, not like in the days of early 20s as standard.

Or the saying could mean by 40 you are more relaxed about who you are and more confident etc. But tbh that ideal seems a bit indulgent for people from a past era...

Can I ask the PPs who started a new career in their forties what they do?

Digital marketing & I love it.

Thank you. What is good about it, please?

Yes, life changed radically.

Thank you. What is good about it, please?

I work for an agency, so there’s the variety of marketing different websites & a range of skills I get to use - copywriting, data analysis, reporting & coding mainly. And lots of interaction with people. There’s always a new challenge & something new to learn, which is exactly how I like it.

I'm 40 in a couple of years. I'm currently re-training to be a teacher, so by the time I'm 40 I should hopefully be working full time in a new field. I haven't full time in about 10 years so a big change. My oldest dc will be in secondary and my younger dc will be out of infants so think my life will slowly start to feel a bit like my own again!!! If it all goes to plan of course!!