Small wedding (with a tiny budget)

[Purplesndteal]

Posting here for traffic. I hope you lovely MN will be able to guide me with some hoenst opinions as the world of FB groups either doesn't have an opinion or are (IMO) just being nice for the sake of it.

We're having a registry office wedding. Seating capacity is about 50. We're planning to have our reception in our house which is literally down the road. Our outside space is absolutely tiny (8x12ft) plus a decked are of 2x8ft. We have your average size dining and lounge rooms for a late 19th century terraced house. We have a galley kitchen so that space doesn't count.

How many guests do you think would fit in all areas? We think optimistically about 50 but more like 30.

Would geueata be ok so be standing for some of the time? (Realistically we can sit around 25).

It's all DIY (think afternoon tea after the ceremony) with maybe having something more filling later in the evening (kebabs / pasties).

We'd have an "open bar" (think cocktails in drink dispensers), bubbly, beer and maybe wine.

I like the whole idea, but I don't know if our guests would appreciate it TBH. What do you think?

Yes I would appreciate whatever made you happy. However, I suppose my worry if I was you would be the chaos in the house. Is there a village hall or something like that nearby? They are often great for weddings and you can make use of the space. Also very little cost.

I’ve been to a similar wedding where there were not enough seats and it wasn’t fun standing up in heels, holding a drink and trying to eat all at the same time. If you’re having a low key wedding I would keep it to immediate friends and family and make sure they are comfortable.

Thanks moonbar I don't like them at all. The house has the benefit that our children can go to their rooms of they decide they've had enough.

I would keep numbers down. If the space is small and not enough seats it’s not going to be much fun.

I would love that kind of wedding as a guest though. No stress, casual, low key :)

I would max out at 30 and I would just be realistic about how long the reception will last. Unless your guests are all young, you won’t be partying til the wee hours, at least not with everyone.

A wedding at home is absolutely lovely so don’t worry about keeping it simple.

It could certainly work, and we went to someone similar at a registry office last year. They did include a low key meal at a restaurant, then went back to their garden though for drinks and later snacks. Is there a nearby pup that would be an option or a restaurant where you could use a back room?

Some things to think about though if having it at your home:

• where will people go if there is bad weather and could they ALL fit inside the house?
• Would a marquee/tent be an option in the garden, or even in the front yard for those that want to smoke and to spread people out a bit more?
• Would there be enough seating for people? Not only elderly, but those in heels, pregnant or just who just cant stand for hours on end?
• Would you be able to remove/thin out the furniture in the lounge area to allow more space and seats?
• Could you borrow fold out chairs, so those that need/want one can use them, but can take up minimal space when not in use.
• You could use bunting across the garden, fairy lights or those home-made giant pom pom things (assuming they are still IN nowadays???)

There room for a tiny marquee/tent in the patio (though not the decking) . I partly love the idea of a home wedding becaus ei can decorate 100% the way I like it and because and open bar is affordable!

There's a pub within walking distance of the office I have thought of it as an option but to me it feels awkward to ask the guests toove to our house after that.

I got married 20 years ago, just after a good friend whose Father threw her an amazing and properly posh bash in a Scottish castle.
Mine was a bit different. In a beautiful Church but then back to my semi-detached ex LA house for food which I'd catered myself. This was not through choice but lack of funds.
I have to say, it was fine. There were about 30 of us. The elderly Aunts appreciated proper comfortable armchairs and being passed endless platefuls of Afternoon Tea.
Some of the older Uncles went out to smoke at the top of the garden.
Most of the women buzzed around distributing food (we had salmon and beef and lots of fizz). There was no stress about Big Speeches, or The First Dance, which suited us fine. The kids charged around happily, and the little ones napped / set up camp in my bedroom when tired.
People could peel of home easily when it suited (most by about 11pm as it had been a 3pm wedding) but a small group of us broke open some single malt and ate homemade snacks at midnight in the garden under some fairy lights I'd wrapped around a canvas gazebo from B&Q.
My posh friend stayed in a local BnB and, perhaps simply very kindly, told me the next day she'd enjoyed it far more than her own glamorous day which had been fraught with timings and protocol.
It was hardly what I'd dreamed of as a younger girl but actually it was fine, and relaxed and nice, and that's the main thing.

(I am divorcing now though, so maybe ignore me!)

What time of year will it be? Agree with a PP that maximising use of the outdoor space would be helpful. Nice bench in the front garden with picnic stools for the more nimble/less drunk? Gazebos front and back.

We don't have a front. It's just the small patio that we have available as outside space. We're an end of terrace and one of the streets leads to a dead end. I think the party could potentially overspill there but I know that's fairly rude to our neighbours.

OldLace that was beautiful to read, sorry about the divorce.

Oh and it will be mid April

How many toilets do you have? 50 people and 1 bathroom won't be ideal

Unfortunately only one toilet

I'd only invite the amount of people you can seat inside. If it's raining no one is going to want to sit outside.

I think the one loo is going to be your sticking point! I don't think you can really have more than 20 with only one loo and that may be pushing it. If I were you I would be looking at a church hall or pub with function room. You can still decorate how you like etc.

I think max 25 guests to make it comfortable for your guests really, you’ll need to make sure there’s plenty seats as PP it’ll be uncomfortable standing up for a long period of time in wedding attire!

Ive been to a similar reception after a registery wedding...but the guest were in the tiny country pub, max 50..There wasnt enough room to all sit, not much room to maybe have a bit of a dance, only 2 toilets.
It was tbh, pretty awkward the 2hrs I stayed as simply not enough room...and it was mid summer and raining haha.
I'd definitely consider a little village hall or maybe a pub ?

Good luck in whatever you decided

The dress code is casual (we'll be wearing trainers although I don't know if that makes any difference to our guests).

I genuinely don't like village halls. All the ones I've been to look fairy grotty.

You could hire poseur tables (bar tables around 1.10cm high) for people to place food and drinks on. If you have excess furniture on the ground floor that you could move upstairs to make space. Many hire tables are suitable for indoors and outdoors.
Bar stools take up less space than chairs and sofas.
designedforhire.com/collections/parties
Or a vintage style long table in the garden with lightweight wooden crossback chairs would seat a good number.

What is the most you have hosted in the space before? After lockdown, why not do a trial run and have friends/family over for an informal BBQ/luncheon so you can see how the space gets used with so many people?

Even if you asked everyone to bring a plate or their own BBQ meat/veggie options, it would certainly help you plan max numbers for your wedding.

Thanks Diana those look amazing!

We've never hosted before we've just moved in

I genuinely don't like village halls. All the ones I've been to look fairy grotty.

There's a lot you can do to jazz them up. I know you would prefer it at home, but with limited space and one toilet it isn't going to be a pleasant experience for your guests.

I think you need to make sure everyone can be seated or accept that it will be a very brief party.

We did almost exactly this 7 1/2 years ago. 1880 house, one toilet, we catered.

We went to the registry office in the morning leaving my brother and his now wife in charge of greasing jacket potatoes and cutting up cheese etc.

We only had parents at the registry office and we got home to meet our 35ish guests who had been given tea and cake by my brother.

We then took everyone on a walk through the woods near our house (we had warned people and asked that they wear appropriate footwear).

When we got back the jacket potatoes were cooked and we stuffed ourselves with those, cheese and other bits while getting sozzled.

We used paper plates and eco friendly disposable cups and cutlery. Everyone had a good time (especially us) and we were pleasantly surprised at how little tidying/cleaning was needed the next day.

If it's what you want it'll be fine. Enjoy yourselves and stuff what anyone else thinks (including me). After all, if it goes to plan you'll only have 1 wedding

Oh and we borrowed chairs and a folding table from parents and the neighbours.